Deedee's got VD and Dot's got the trots. Sally and Bob are on the job and Gail's in jail. Sue's locked in the loo and Ted's off dead. Hiram's in the asylum and Kevin's gone to Devon. Monique's up the creek and Zeke's gone for a leak. Ben and Jen are in the pen and Howell's got loose bowels. Bella's got salmonella, Vitus has got colitis. Lou's got the flu and David's got covid. Phyllis has caught syphilis, and Lydia has chlamydia
Jeff's gone deaf and Jock's got the pox.
Baby Spice and Pat Rice have pubic lice
Darren Gough has whooping cough
Jack's got a bad back and Zack's had a dhansak.
Ernie's got a hernia and Rhona's got a stoma.
Ursula's got a fistula and Una's got a tumour but that may only be a rumour.
Darren's wife is barren and Steph had IVF.
Guy's got a UTI and Si's got a broken fly.
