I really shouldn’t be doing this. It is OK to leave gaps in my writing rather than do it regularly regardless but there’s nothing else to do. If it was a business I’d just have spent a fortune on marketing as the numbers are not good and I need some advice on content. I have considered turning it purely into a themed blog based on rude words and bodily functions. I reckon the numbers would drop even more but I’d get a few cult followers. The trouble is it’s a very limited area and how many ways can you rearrange poo pee and farts before you repeat the whole thing altogether? I have probably tried and done it without even realising it already. I have discovered that after many years they found snowflakes that were the same, but is every fart different in sound? All similar but could two be exactly the same? That’s one area of exploration- and makes them all the more interesting as each one is a new musical experience. Yes, when all else fails this is where my minds rests. Possibly explaining my lack of friends and partner but then again Beavis and Butthead made millions. Maybe if I want retarded teenagers as friends I could have hundreds, but not anyone with a brain.
I am in the anticlimax zone between work and more work, where all has been done and you find yourself with absolutely nothing. Today was spent watching football on TV, internet and the gym. OK, I think Sundays are allowed to be like this but my guess is tomorrow will be little different and don’t really care either way. Without friends or a girlfriend I will be bound to run out of activities eventually and this has happened till my next photo trips when I get the chance. Back to toilets for a minute, do rude words sound funny because of the meaning or would they be funny anyway? The sort of questions Goethe and Spinoza (whoever he was) didn’t spend years pondering. Turd, faeces, anus, rectum, they all sound like the sort of words clowns use. Faeces the clown and his dog rectum. There are probably at least one pair without me even realising it. That or I need to be put away, I can’t tell. Spike Milligan did OK with such observations so something tells me good old British public school humour is alive and well. Now technically I didn’t go to public school as mine was prep school, and I left instead of graduating to public school when I was 12 as I hated it. I would have gone there and even if I left after a day I’d still be a public school pupil, but somehow I may have just missed the boat. Big deal. I never went to university either. Only about a third of degrees were from universities when I did mine, and I went to a polytechnic and an institute of higher education. Technically all were identical so all are now thank goodness recognised as universities, but not when I was there. But I’d rather do well at a poly than scrape through a dodgy subject at the university of Barra. You have to look through the packaging to look at the product underneath.
Ahead I see the usual nothing. I can’t even imagine any good possible stuff as it’s so far from my current reality I have had to forget it all. Socially I am as isolated as if I’d arrived in London from the third world and didn’t know anyone and speak a word of English. Besides family I have a few hangers on (through their choice) and that’s it. The cat has more friends than me now. She sits outside with the black cat opposite, who likes sitting with all the local cats, and the awful stray tabby who eats all her food and pisses everywhere. Becoming a recluse is only ever partly through choice and usually through circumstances which don’t change. So as long as I’m producing something I’m reasonably happy, and anything more is a bonus. I see the great comedians who either produced all their lifetimes or were cut down suddenly younger than me and have determined to produce all the rest of my life so nothing is wasted. If I ever got a penny more for what I produce again it would help and eventually allow me to drop most other forms of income as that pays the best and is more fun. It’s certainly possible, I can keep learning and improving and eventually find an employer. I’m looking at ways to frame and sell photos now and am speaking to a printer to try and get a sample lot done, and then like my book will need to try every gallery on earth to try and get them displayed. One way to get me out of the house anyway. Well I think I’ve covered everything before I start rambling properly, I’ll stop before it’s too late.
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