Seeing the light

Life goes on. It's been a harmless but predictable week, a little work, a few photos and the usual arrangements in between. The news has been a little better inasmuch as Newsweek (a great mouthpiece for the IPCC until now) has now stated 'The connection between the sensitivity to CO2 and temperature increases is no longer clear enough to know we are affecting the climate'. Well no shit Sherlock, if they have finally given in and said what many other scientists have been saying all along then regardless of the momentum continuing elsewhere this is more or less like Al Gore making a sequel called 'A fucking inconvenient mistake'. Honestly. The beginning of the end.

I'm in no mood for stress, and at least not actually that worried about the dentist now, it's not a major construction this time and a nice place so just have preferred a quick resolution but am ok with it for now. My nerves have been all over the place for half my life and tablets have helped a lot but had to be changed and never found anything as good when the side effects forced the issue. I have no problem with my normal life, currently panic for unusual arrangements but nearly always go, and just distance restricted for now which is probably the commonest symptom of agoraphobia there is. But although 40 miles seems nothing compared to the past it's a lot more than most can do. Still a damn limit though and would be nice to lose at least some more of it.

Alex Jones explained the Bilderberg Group on the radio last night, the people who rule the planet and sole aim to turn the human race into their slaves. An article today said due to the internet people are finally waking up and may ruin their plans. Thank god for that eh? Even my small efforts (I know how many people read this and my other messages) have informed at least a few people that global warming isn't what they tell us, and authorities deliberately try and hurt us to get what they want, they are not there for our benefit, never were, never will be. They see themselves as a superior elite who want to control the world (hence now released plans for a world government) and stop us being free and spoiling their fun. But now everyone can share and network it can't last much longer. A few thousand people may read David Icke's books, but millions read the internet every day. Each single person who learns the IPCC are only using information which supports the conclusion they have decided they want, or people are giving their carbon offsets to big businesses to do with as they please means we are doing our job well. For instance in 5 years when we have the next election, if enough people realise this then they'll want to vote for a party not collecting green taxes as they know they are going to big business worldwide. With five years freedom to do so our energy prices will rise so much (as Bilderberg planned) people will be so poor they will only care about survival. And realise it was the green taxes and no recession that did it.

Back to this life, my ex from the north is in London and threatening to turn up tomorrow but I don't think it'll happen now and I'm not in the right state to be pushed around all afternoon at the moment. Absolutely no other plans now, ideas or much else, but that's half my life. This week was fine really and I suppose just one major shift on global warming made it a profit. Do I expect too much? Seeing everyone else with their friends and family while I am privileged to see mine when I do I probably don't. The Emmerdale plane has crashed on Kingsbury, killing off 80% of the cast and only leaving a handful of old originals too spread out to form a community. A rare guest appearance from the few who survived but moved away and that's it. The rest is pretty much the same as everyone else- I'm not famous and neither are most other people, I'm trying to be, or at least get some more media work, and so are many others. That's a luxury, friends and family never should be. Things can always change but I'm not in charge there.

Week's roundup

As my energy returns I'm gradually able to do more and more I could before, and have been the last week or so as well. That is a relief I can tell you. Nearly all business rather than pleasure but have been able to wander round shopping centres again which is not easy with little energy or balance. Youtake nothing for granted again in your life when you were barely able to do anything.

So, life is going on regardless. I've got a lot done and out of the way, small media possibilities later on, and the rest is down to fate and inspiration. More business chores to do but less urgent at least. Where it is heading, if anything ever does, is anyone's guess. Like if I settle for a retarded girlfriend as she is attractive and harmless, that is assuming she ever decides she wants me? Not technically retarded but functionally, meaning that is the actual impression her problems give. That won't change as far as I know, but fate again will step in and make the decision for me, well she will and the fact there isn't anyone else. But better than a kick in the teeth should it actually happen.
Inconclusive events continue as well, my hypnotic regression to see if I'd been abducted by aliens has been carried out and I was fluent and consistent. Rather than focus on the very basic and unconvincing event, not so much a memory as a vision of one, but whether it has connected me to a higher source of intelligence. I was answering questions of a pretty technical nature, often as if being told the answers and it all held together at the end. I'll see if it continues now and report back.

So, looking ahead, various things are possible and others the usual daily plans like a trip to Hanwell for photos of local features. I've run out of many places but Hanwell probably has its moments. I'm also simplifying my global warming message to a list of claims and truth which shouldn't take to long to create. They are the enemy as they are diverting resources from genuine causes and costing the ordinary people (you as well) a fucking fortune. What exactly are they spending the money on to stop global warming once they get it? Mainly to pay for Iraq. Problem-reaction-solution. Once you learn their methods they become totally transparent. I repeat them as until the majority believe it they'll win.

Religion and more

Firstly, two observations on religion. One, we pour scorn in tribal religions and sun worshippers, but what on earth difference are they from our modern or popular ones? Are the bible stories any less outlandish or have I missed something.
If you compare the delusions of the average schizophrenic there is little difference besides the huge number who accept the religious ones.
Next, the comfort God gives to his followers is no different to a sugar pill. If you look close enough at religion it's founded on nothing. There's nothing there. If people have found a way to feel good for no reason then just use that without the nonsense.

Now back to reality. My neighbour pissed around on the computer yesterday and it's running around 250hz now. No idea why but something's got in. I can't even do a virus scan as it's too slow for that. I cleaned the disk but no effect. System restore next step.

Otherwise it's been another busy week, and got a few essential jobs out of the way. One was returning a library book to my school after 37 years. I knew it was here but hadn't got round to taking it until I had to contact them about something else. The secretary was pretty nice as well. A good reason to return for the full tour I turned down today (nowhere to park for starters). I've really narrowed down my list of awaited news to two items. The rest are irrelevant. All that's happened so far is my 3rd pair of Status Quo tapes arrived to replace the lost or damaged ones from the past. I already heard last week why my 4th TV programme hadn't been shown, the firm went broke before completing the series so totally down to them to fix it now it's been passed along. No more plans now, none. OK, two minutes on Monday to fill a prescription. Two visitors couldn't make it midweek, one being a relief as has now become a pest, so I've completed all my work virtually alone, as usual for the current period of time.

Of course timing is irrelevant in my career, if a project is completed when is not important. What is important is the current one is the biggest ever and my first newspaper job. Meanwhile after thinking I could catch up with last year's series of Grange Hill after I discovered there was one came to a halt on the second day when they stopped it as it was about suicide. Pathetic. No idea if they will show it now, or if before the new and final series in April.
I can't see ahead besides having to wait in for the cleaner tomorrow. More than that I cannot say. The week was fine really and I just hope the rewards are next. It's been a long time coming if it is.

It's not happening

Thursday is over, and just realised I've written this on February 29th. And it's the year of the rat, and I was born in a leap year and rat. That means every 4th sign must hit a leap year. More or less as for whatever reason Chinese years don't match ours exactly.
I was about to talk about something but that just occurred to me.

I'm actually incredibly busy. It seems the lack of outside news has forced me to make my own activities, and each day despite often not having a clue what I'll do have now covered miles of places taking photos and videos, and bough a few little bits and pieces as well. The only contact I've had with the media was an email from one place telling me not to keep emailing them (in a nice way) as they were still waiting for the information. From who- God himself? Fuck me, if my business was organised like that I'd be quite eligible for excommunication. If someone phones you and asks a question then you usually answer, but use email and you can put it off till retirement. Now one trail I followed was correct, a production company I worked with (for an afternoon anyway) did go bust, but the good news was my project was taken on with a few of their staff by another agency. Who don't even answer their fucking phones. For weeks. Had I been a paying customer I expect they'd all get their cocks out and ask me if I wanted a lick, but ex-client (unpaid) and you may as well be a typhoid carrier. Bastards.

I have been told by everyone I know in the media (it's called networking and pure luck in some cases) that this is par for the course. Now OK, if they're nice to everyone until they've finished with them (like the worst salesmen) and then drop them like a used tampon what if they need you again? That is not a way to make yourself a reputation.
Please God the next job gets used and even if not, sooner or later I could reach the status where they may actually respect me and decide I'm worthy of receiving money as well. Meanwhile on a similar vein the last series of Grange Hill (they actually had it last year) was repeated this week on CBBC where it was shifted last year without one viewer knowing (including me). So I though thank goodness, I'm able to see it again. Episode 1 was Monday, oddly at lunchtime when lots of schoolkids are watching. Not. It was scheduled for every day till the series finished and by Tuesday had been cancelled. If it's on again next week I'll get over the treatment, but where the hell did it go and why? They're all at it, the third series of Mystery Hunters apparently was never shown in the USA. They're now starting filming the 4th, and as it's no longer shown here and the USA are still playing repeats then who the hell's meant to see it outside Canada where it's made?

Meanwhile I carry on driving round London with cameras and tidying the house while Rome burns, Prince Harry is in Afghanistan, other items are being used considered more important than my article, producers are losing their businesses, more series are being pulled, women are not thinking about me, new buildings are being planned for after I'll be dead, and nothing actually ever happens or changes.
I still hope to become famous, however long it takes. It's started, very slowly, but has begun. I may not be working that much now to earn it but put in enough in the buildup that it's all a delayed reaction. But a million times more likely than a decent woman. Apparently.

Reporting the news

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Stating the obvious

The mind has layers, possibly endless, and when little is happening here worth reporting IO search the depths to see what I can find instead. Up and down is one recent theme, at least I go up in between coming down and am reading a book about staying up more which may help. Anyway, so far when I look in the depths once I used up the philosophy came the scatology, but you can only rearrange poo words so many ways and I've done more than most would dare already. So I'll quickly summarise the facts so far and then see what else arrives as there's no TV and little else to do online and I like doing this.
I've been working both days this week since Tuesday, accounts, gardening and more. Makes a bloody change. I feel more useful and normal when I do as it's no longer in my experience to have a real job and for all I know or care may never be. Meanwhile I see the evidence on TV has done little to cool the heat of the global warming machine, to use terms related. Like communism an ideology has taken over a huge part of the world via the UN and lower units such as governments and massive pressure groups run by eco-fascists who have moved their emphasis from destroying capitalism directly to doing it with green taxes. Anything to stop freedom and progress. These guys have been holding us back throughout history but tend to slow progress as a slight weight rather than succeed completely, otherwise we'd already all be on horseback.

Politics and diary over, where do I go? First crime, look ahead. Well total routine, work, friend and grandma tomorrow as every Thursday though work and friend are intermittent, and little more beyond. Album arriving maybe Saturday and new photos Wednesday now they don't collect and deliver. Nothing notable there. I can't find anything interesting or funny left in these layers, I'd used up nostalgia some time ago and the supernatural can only be reported when something new happens. If it ever does. It is a challenge and looking over my entry feel like deleting it but that would be admitting defeat, and if I was reading a blog wouldn't care whether the story was based on up or down but how it was presented. And watching how someone's mind works is part of that. Do other people think like me or am I maybe more direct than most, like Mr Spock? Logical. I often mention questions and points so simple no one else thought of them, which frankly terrifies me. How can so many people apparently miss the obvious questions about anything when they are so simple? Don't ask me.

If only I am the judge of my own actions then I've done OK. I refuse to do more than is considered reasonable as I've had to rise to many occasions in life and at my time feel there should be no need beyond the odd visit to the dentist. And as I lift more weight at the gym I lift less in life outside. What was easy is difficult and what was difficult is impossible. Chronic fatigue is real and though I've got over it am now learning to risk doing a little each time again in case I break down in the middle as I could do. My mind works but my body wears out very quickly and easily, and it's forced me to reevaluate all I do and how I judge myself and explain it to others. Before it was choice and option, now I simply can't do a lot of things. Nothing medical any more, but same effect as if it still was. Anyway, one person could help me out of it if around regularly but there is no such person. If anything would that would be it. Who is it?

The big con

Back again already. Oddly this week has so far mirrored last week in that I worked the first two days and then took photos. Pissing with rain but besides lowering the light can still take photos, I just stayed in the car. But go into London and there's no space to pull over and I was forced to block traffic or take views with things in the way, but got just enough worth using. Then I'll be trying to sell the albums in a few places as could get quite a cottage industry if people like the idea. I also found a local doctor my mother knew who checked my ear and besides a pinhole in the eardrum which may have nothing to do with it gave me some jollop to put in which should clear it up once I collect it. But it wasn't serious so that's a relief.

Tomorrow is free and I intend to mop up some photographic loose ends and more phone calls, including some about the albums. One picture involves stopping in a road where I probably can't park and waiting patiently for a train to pass on the side I get a full shot. The line runs along a tiny stretch of residential road and I saw a train go past and should make a nice picture. Out of my lovely landscapes and cats, what has the most views? Top three, all London Underground signs. Amazing. And the most popular views aren't fields and trees but motorways. It just shows what we like personally bears no relation to what others do.

One little theme around me is that of teacher and educator. I've heard from various sources about my wisdom, though what to me seems like commonsense combined with experiences to apply it to few others appear to have the time, patience and ability to do it themselves. Fascinating. There are two ways to become a guru, the proper way is to be enlightened, but have to know how it happened or you have no path to offer. The second which happens on its own is where people see it in you whatever you can or can't do. This is some sort of spiritual source and as if we only channel it and use a part of ourselves which they pick up and all I can say is I hope whatever I know can help people as it hasn't got me out of any current situation of my own however well I now understand them. This is partly as I've discovered how little we can do about our surroundings, as if I've drawn a map and then said the only problem is we can't get anywhere in it. Like it's a place but not here. Or DNA, this is how it is, live with it.

One thing I can do is see through bullshit. Tony Blair and global warming. If the solar system is heating up we can't worry about it being man made, where man creates under 1% of all CO2 in the atmosphere. This is easily found and no one seems to react to it besides the few, and scientists who disagree lose their funding. If someone wants to rob you you wouldn't give them your money, but if they tell you a sob story maybe you will. Same as global warming. If someone's father needs an operation in a third world country they use this one to con westerners out of their money. Global warming is a variation of the theme, and if you're going to lie, make it a whopper. By the time the plebs realise it's all a crock of shit the taxes will be in place, and guess what, all parties will agree (deja vu with the common market, as I warned in 1975).

There is a difference between being a guru and being sensible, but you need one for the other. And you shouldn't really use it to fuel your ego as you'll lose the status if you do. It's not about status but destiny and if it goes to your head then you're not up to it. It's about the message not the messenger and if even one new person gets the point they don't need to remember who told them, though they can recommend others listen as well to hear it. One test is if you challenge someone's ideas and they can answer every challenge, meaning they have fully thought it through and know the facts behind the conclusion. To this end I keep a file of science on global warming, and rely on others who do the same for Israel which is blamed for the things in the world not caused by CO2 emissions. The fact Israel has never raised a hand in war against anyone since 1948 without being provoked is something ignored by the antisemitic media, and if Israel were left alone by the Arabs another single bullet would never be shot in the country or across the border. If Israel stopped defending iteslf it would be wiped out within days. That is a simple formula and one proved every time they return a little buffer zone to the original Arab owners and get shot as a result. And then as soon as they leave Lebanon the thick sods kick the shit out of eachother in Beirut High Road in full view of the cameras. They are stupid c**ts and in the nature of enough of them to murder their enemies that if you remove one (the jews in this case) they just replace them with another (Christians/other Muslims not of their group). Sad to say it's part of the culture and if Israel wasn't there (as the loony left wish to solve the whole world's ills) the Arabs would simply start on the next victim as it's what they do. Just watch the news when they rarely show them doing it against eachother instead of Israel or the west. They hardly seem to need a reason, they are posturing like New York and Harlesden yardies and it's just a macho total lack of social status overcompensative behaviour. That means we have stone age mentalities living alongside the 21st century and naturally they do not mix.

Apart from a few maniacs no jews when faced with injustice set fire to cars or bomb shopping centres. They complain and nothing happens. It's what we do. We talk a good job and do relatively little to change it physically. Just like the British except they really don't know how to complain. The French however put their balls where there mouth is and kick shit if petrol goes up 5 cents. They might be arrogant bastards but they won't lie down and be used as a doormat.

This is an antidote to political correctness. The British police were banned from reporting the huge proportion of violent crime was committed by black people (despite being the true findings) as (regardless of 99.9% of citizens working it out) as confirming the bitter facts would fuck up the whole lie they try to feed us about multiculturalism, unchecked immigration and all the other shit we are now suffering under what is more or less a totalitarian socialist regime (what else could charging people per mile to drive be?). He says it's to stop congestion rising 40% by 2020. The fact curbing immigration by 40% by 2020 will keep it at 0% is not mentioned, he'd rather flood the country and then price us off the roads, except many foreigners whose cars won't be registered here anyway...

Bored as hell...

Today's theme is bored. Not just now but looking ahead. Probably an illusion and if I see it improve will show me it was. I hope it won't rub off to my reader and will be inspiration to my writing not a damper.
Only routine activities recently, nothing really happened besides just making a top 100 list in the soon to end funtrivia quiz. These are kept for posterity so hope to maintain it for the week or two before it ends. These are some of the top quizzers in the world so some achievement.
Meanwhile hoping for a few coming forks in the road it only takes one person or possibly event to improve my life, it certainly takes little enough to fuck it up, and having completed a 60 day self development course (only a short CD per day basically) I am now meditating again, the only thing within my power to help myself. I've been watching Maharaji video clips again and it looks even better than before. Not many teachers have the insight and material to offer he does and the thousands of people who have learnt his meditation have often had huge improvements in their lives. I certainly know what it can do even though it didn't happen as much as it could for me.

So, I am almost lost but not quite as I have a few tricks to keep me sane, mainly only planning a day ahead as I described. I will be going to take pictures of more paths in Highgate next, then picking the best of the lot for another album. Technically if you take your eyes off the news, like they have to in Big Brother, it's a lot easier to focus on real life. The news isn't our life and isn't relevant, trust me. Most would have no effect and we are only aware as the media selectively tell us what is happening. Iraq can look after itself and just as people abroad don't give a fuck about our problems why do we need to hear in incredible detail about theirs? It's all a device to take our attention away from real problems we don't need the TV to tell us are happening. So the news can silence itself, the day Wembley Stadium opens I'll see the parking restrictions so no need to be told, and people elsewhere don't need to know unless they're going to see something there. Real news is what changes our lives and there's little new in the world and what gets on the news isn't what affects us. Now they're talking about the Falklands. Obviously a quiet news day. 99% of Brits couldn't find them on a map and we really don't need to care about the place. If they worked to reduce the price of the ferry to the Isle of Wight I'd be interested but no, they spend it on a country almost as far as New Zealand.

Anyway, hopefully my words of wisdom can pull a few readers back down to earth, and remind you to focus on local reality not nonsense far away which is none of our concern. Well, the next lot of quizzes are ready to play so I'll put everyone out of their misery and piss off. Goodbye.