The purpose of dreams

There are a few times when things stop altogether my life can be pointed back on track by dreams. These overlap the ordinary type but contain what's more like a real person or experience designed to show me what's possible in reality. Where they come from is another story but I know now all supernatural events should be taken advantage in with no need to understand how. People used to have no choice but to live this way but now people think if they don't know it's scientific it can't exist. Well I can say different.
My own intuition is the same as everyone's except I realised fairly quickly there were things I knew I'd always known despite not having an experience of said issues yet. Like food. I can look at anything and know if I won't like it, and if some gets in by accident I'll say there's whatever it is there and it's revolting. Never tried it but always knew. Same with most women I meet. So I am now working on using this more, I've long finished studies where I needed to give references, now I can let go of all that and just go on to higher knowledge, the sort we know without learning it.

I really need inspiration as there's fuck all happening at the moment. When the peak of your life is a backward but attractive woman telling you she's got a boyfriend (after seeing you first) but is fed up with him and may keep you in reserve when she gets back from holiday in 2 months you know there is something very big missing. I'm at a stage in life where I should be using the freedom, but as it was in 1976 when I'd finished my exams early and had to wait for the next school year for A levels I had all the time, transport and no one around to share it with. I'm back there now except I'm now living alone, back then my parents were at work all day but at least came home later on, and I knew I'd be back at college in September. For the first time in ages I plan to meditate more than just weekends, and having lost my regular sex partner of about 20 years to an older man that yawning gap needs dealing with as a priority. She wasn't my type or even free, but insisted on seeing as many men as possible all her adult life whatever her status so I wasn't interfering with anything. It was my safety net which even now is the last thing to go.

Without the dreams I'd forget what I was missing and it was worth having, until it happened by chance. I'm old and wise enough to know I can't just go and get it without paying (which I don't do) but at least am in a positive frame of mind if it does find me. The week ahead is unknown, one job tomorrow and that's it. I'll be hanging round busy roads taking people next, a sure way of becoming unpopular but as total strangers who cares. Random people in the street are some of my best photos and most popular. In my daydreams a woman from the past or present will come and sort me out, just as in my other dreams, and at least of all the rest this is the only one which can happen in reality, although with a lot of work by me first. They come to me about once a decade and even then most are only accepted as they are available, I'd never have gone near them otherwise. Women rarely realise most men will accept them if they throw themselves at them as it happens so rarely they are very grateful. I've turned down a few but they were the real frights and didn't want to be put off it entirely. One I did accept put me off till I saw my girlfriend again when I got back from holiday to see they weren't all that bad. Now I know I won't be put off again by anyone but that was when I was 15.

There are some women who are clearly interested, but being American their culture allows them to show it, and location stops them from doing anything about it. All I can say is if any woman reading this who wants to come to London and offer to shag me is almost definitely going to be accepted. If I had been a woman I'd be calling my ISP tomorrow to have the cable rebooted as it had overloaded overnight. Being a man it's the old way as usual instead. And people believe in God?

Bollocks on Friday

Another week of freedom, which is good. My post reflected this exactly as for the first time since having my own place I didn't have any for 3 days. This was the same as life in general as most post is bad, but a little is good, and if you get none you have nothing.

So the nothing continues, I've emailed Christine, the ex from long ago, another ex who replied after years, another hasn't called back after giving me her number and only having a few minutes to talk. I added to the list by emailing Will Self at last after finding a contact, someone from Big Brother and someone's sister from school. That's a perfect 6/6, and it's not that always happens, but instead either most reply or don't. Always in bunches. Search me how.

So what have I done with the freedom? Two days taking more or less every nice road in NW11, followed by Pinner and Kentish Town. One almost girlfriend visited telling me should she actually dump her boyfriend she wants to dump I'll be next. After a 7 week holiday. Could be worse. The thing about my 'after 40' rule is that if someone has a couple of really good qualities I overlook the others, so rather than an ordinary and uninteresting type I get those with all sorts of major problems and enough good qualities to live with them. Like me I suppose except many women say I haven't got the good ones.
I've had more accounts to do, no other work and that was more or less it.

So with a clear day ahead I just manage to think of enough to do with each one, and had a couple of people who wanted/needed to see me as well which made a lot of difference. There are always elements we don't mention on the blog, in my case I don't want to put people off reading, but when I get rude comments I reckon if they knew why things were a certain way they'd leave off. I've had a selection of health problems that slowed me down for years, and although they are lifting you take some time to get over them, if you ever do. Without the camera I'd have had no reason to go out besides the park when it's sunny, as why the hell go to Kentish Town on your own after Pinner just for the hell of it? I don't go to the shops or anything, I don't need anything there and they don't have anything I can't get round here.

So more empty days lie ahead, indefinitely, like shadows defined not by the presence of good but the relative absence of bad. Like everything in my life this should be a phase but what the next one is could be up or down. Don't wish for change when nothing's wrong as destruction is always easier than creation. I can understand why I used to watch the news in case any predicted or unpredicted crisis ever happened, and basically they haven't and even when they do they only affect the people in the immediate vicinity (eg Iraq) and not us in London. Except being bombed which wasn't on my list of possible excitement. Life is bog standard and normal most if not all the time, I do have some evidence of psychic power, albeit of little practical use, and the only other action has been in the form of females and meeting the odd celebrity. Now I want to be the celebrity the next step in my career needs to happen to allow that, which is basically on the edge.

The lower part of my mind still pops up sometimes imagining something will suddenly happen to improve everything, but we are given such mental weaknesses only to overcome rather than use, which is why I'm not religious, which is just a larger version of the same thing.
There are definite patterns in life, but no happy endings.

Will it ever happen?

So many of my posts are about what I'd like to happen I expect some people are wondering if any ever will. Especially me. So here's a list of some and then some which have come to pass.

Firstly ever since attending a lecture in 1996 I've been told there's a thing called enlightenment. I can now just about accept this having read accounts of people on LSD who seem to be able to create it artificially. Of course if you do it naturally and it's possible then I can, especially as I've worked my way through a number of teachers to show me how.

Marriage. This is out of my hands and is far less important than simply finding a compatible sexual partner, ie one I actually want.

Fame. That is the best of my bunch, something I was determined to have all my life and on the verge now, having missed like Lee Westwood in the US Open golf last night by a hair's breadth when the article I did via interview for The Sun wasn't used. I know the rules to become famous, use them religiously, and this would have done it. Not on its own but would inevitably had started the ball rolling. I'm currently in the penumbra, or whatever the astronomers call it, just on the edge. It can't be long before someone lets me finish the job.

Finally I want to return to where I lived for 28 years, Hampstead Garden Suburb or Temple Fortune if not, just across the Finchley Road.

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I have of course in 48 years covered many ambitions already, although the time taken was at times way beyond what was planned. My degree took me till I was 24, and my final professional qualification was at 41. But I got them.
I bought my first flat at 28 and house at 32. They taught me business is the easiest, any spiritual development in between, and people the hardest. You can't herd people like you can sheep, or rely on them like you can with money. Not even your own family can be relied on at all times so basically you can't arrange a fucking thing when it comes to living with someone, who your friends are, or marriage. People who never had to try think it's mechanical. If you join a group all your problems will be solved. Bollocks. Since I left college full time in 1984 I've joined:

Psychic development groups
Meditation group
3 1/2 years of part time courses
Voluntary work in a community theatre
6 years as a volunteer counsellor, split between a youth club and community centre
5 years at a gym (ongoing)
and any more I may have forgotten.

In that time I met at all these:

One woman I saw once on a date, one more as a friend.
One woman I shared healings with.
One woman I could have met had I not met someone just after I called her.
One visit to see a fellow youth worker who may have fancied me (not mutual).
One good friend I wanted more from for many years.
Been to a couple of parties (no success).

So in all those activities which covered almost 20 years, I only gained one new friend who I wasn't even successful with the way I wanted to, and basically joined those places to do the activities, anything else was a bonus.
Prior to that before my degree I'd been to a few years evening classes in drama, 7 years art, including pottery and sculpture, 5 years horse riding, and any others I may have missed.
Not to mention all my jobs.

There I met:

Two people I was invited to about twice
One au pair who turned me down

and that I think was it. I think it was mainly the type of people, as wherever I was with people like me I met lots of people who remained friends for decades. But school and the music holiday I went to for 22 summers are over, and there's nothing to replace it. So I try and pull at funerals, cafes, people I see on TV, the internet, women in shops, and domestics who work for my family. Nothing.

My last women have actually come from the internet, a party, a blind date from Yorkshire, a blind date from Hendon and a friend's friend. Totally random. But never from groups. Not in my whole life. Forget it.
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So my business plans remain on target albeit late, totally due to lack of getting an Equity card which is a passport to success for those who can show any talent or effort. My career was also stopped by no O level maths, so no teachers training and many other professions.
The supernatural is based between experimenting and meditation and both continue but results are never predictable.
The rest is out of my hands as it always was. It's happened before but does that mean it can happen again?

Time and shit on my hands

Someone who may eventually read this just said blogging is a waste of time (I disagree), was giving up, and simply carried on at another address. Go figure. Maybe it was a denial of an addiction, but this is therapy and can't be overdone as long as the buggers keep it free.

My freedom continues, and it's a real test after 3 days with no one at all around. That's what not living in a family does to people, and if you're borderline weird beforehand then the isolation can make any tendencies into full blown complexes, which I'd be unaware of as it seems normal from here. If I didn't have this to fill the gaps I guarantee it would be even worse, even though I haven't had a comment added for months. I have hardly read any blogs since then either but when the people you used to read stop writing or change topics to focus on one area then it's hard to find new ones. I'm going out soon and have been pretty busy this week but it was bound to run out of steam eventually. Either jobs I needed to do have been done, put off or forgotten altogether. The people I'm emailing drop off day by day as it becomes less likely one will reply, and I've virtually run out of people to try in all the years I have been trying.

The results haven't actually been so bad overall. One girlfriend from a dating site, two old friends and various new people I'd met on the internet including my new friend from Big Brother. So basically the only gap was the old girlfriends, which although many have succeeded in reviving all but one of mine that was single again (only a few) had got rid of me and clearly didn't want any more coming back to haunt them. The other was divided by distance, and has more than got her own back since I decided it was too far for me to travel all those years ago. Most people move on and if not gain, at least don't lose too much. My friends all but vanished since 2002 and besides the girlfriend who spent most of two years in mental hospital before it all went rotten that has been it more or less, plus the TV work.
I expect the letter I wrote about the Tesla tower will be published and get the cause nowhere (they always do when money is required, even when it's for someone else) and the others will just be eliminated from my list as always.
I'm off to take some photos now, still keeping occupied.

Filling the vacuum

The hoovering can wait, this is the vacuum of freedom but nothing actually happening besides my own resources. No other people involved from one day to the next.
I know freedom is a blessing, you never forget that when you haven't got it, but is it enough? The camera means I visit places I've known most of my life just to get photos of them, and if I'm lucky I find something else to do while I'm there. I finally made it to the cafe in the park in Hendon on the way back today and had a nice walk around it after.

Many things have been eliminated from my list as usual, the newspaper article being the biggest, the women having failed already haven't been lost as they were already, but I keep trying new things, often through sudden inspiration. Of these few ever make it, but gives me a chance. I've written to a couple more celebrities, one who I actually knew at primary school, and am still promoting the Tesla Tower, my positive contribution in exchange for doing all I can to destroy the myth of global warming. Greenpeace and Friends of the Earth, who I sent this to first, clearly proved they are interested not in the environment but in destroying capitalism by showing no interest in genuine alternative energy at all. At least they had the chance and blew it. I'm now looking for backers to build a small working version and see finally if it works or not. If it does and anyone who knows can see it doing so then all the oil barons will lose their power overnight. Having come across someone who can run an engine on water I have little doubt all these energy sources are genuine.

I also visited the perimeter fence of the Big Brother house on my travels today, and looked around to see a few people who'd got in as media hacks and had proper photos inside. I'll do that next I'm sure. It's quite different inside now but still the same place.
So, I keep getting inspiration to get me to the next day and no further, which is good enough, like a penny in the black. You could have a lot more but you're still just in profit.
If anything is ever developing behind the scenes we never know until it's revealed, but on global warming the news against is now outnumbering the news for, simply as there's nothing to actually report in it's credit. A tree cannot offer fruit any different from what it has, as the bible says, and this is a nothing tree. One that needed the rebels to prove the fact as the illusion was a very good one (for the sheep, you know who you are) but no different from the Wizard of Oz or The Matrix. Once you're unhooked you wonder how you could ever have believed it.

I may not be enlightened in that I see no more illusion in suffering than many people do in global warming, but it's only the esoteric final step that currently eludes me. Within the illusion of time and space the gurus claim is false I do see the illusions for what they are, and when you've caught one out the rest become a lot easier as they all have the mark of the devil. In biblical terms that means a lie can only bear a lie, and the signs are all the same. Facts don't need to be shouted or exagerrated, they speak for themselves. Liars shout or overelaborate. Just study police techniques and you'll see the same signs in everything. Al Gore probably needs to take a shot of Botox before he gives a speech to stop his body twitching like a spastic as he's telling so many whoppers.
If I ever get any personal credit for sharing the truth it'll be a bonus. What I really want is people to see through the illusion before we all return to poverty not seen for centuries in the west. This is armageddon, the final showdown. If they can catch us on global warming (and terrorism) they'll finish us off. No cars, no electricity (except nuclear) and travel permits. That is where it's heading. I said in 1975 vote no to the EU as they'd take over and no one listened. Now they make 80% of our laws. I have a track record in this area. Use your own senses. Is the climate really any different? Can you tell?

Monday again

There is no known future, and the present is taken up filling the time there is. One single project remains alive, the TV programme I did a couple of years ago which is now almost ready to go on air. No idea when though. Otherwise I plan a day or less ahead, and the next plan is a trip to Marylebone with the camera. As I'm working till tomorrow that covers me till about Thursday and that's basically how it's happening at the moment.

Ongoing projects still continue, my one man effort to disprove to enough people that global warming is an issue, my work with alien abductees and my plan to promote the Tesla tower, the only proven method to transmit cheap energy. The two big environmental groups took no interest, as they are interested in destroying capitalism, not helping anyone. That's now been tested. Plus no doubt (like Al Gore) they hold stakes in their own version of alternative energy which is a way of ripping people off from another angle.

So for now my blog has to be more entertaining than reality. If I can pull that off. So there's the rude angle (pulling off, jerking off, jacking off, having a wank etc) and any other. I will admit to not reading any blogs for a few weeks, let alone commenting, but why it should have to be a mutual affair as I comment on blogs I search out, not ones who comment on mine. But my small group of followers seem to disappeared to be replaced by who? And when I go out of my way to be controversial (although totally accurate) not a squeak. Only when I dared to say women were less interested in sex than men I got the PC brigade on my arse, and that was by an old friend (admittedly who'd forgotten me completely since then). So either no one's read it or they all agreed with me (which is difficult not to do as my argument was pretty watertight). But I do tune my knowledge doing this, and also the 30,000 plus scientists who signed the petition man made global warming is not proven need as much help as they can get. As the media refuse to bother then it's down to bloggers to fill the space as they can't stop us. I know this to be a fact as Youtube (which is meant to be moderated, unlike this) has the worst Nazi propganda all over it, all of which is regularly reported but has never been removed. So compare that with a totally free site and you can't basically surpress the internet (outside the communist countries anyhow).

Interestingly there are only a couple of people now who bother to disagree with me on global warming. They simply can't. Their case involves data which is either out of date or proven to be false. They have nothing to show us any more. The robbery continues as, like the equally odious Robert Mugabe, no one cares to stop them. Yet. The difference is Mugabe has almost total power over a weak and poverty stricken country, but the world order can only last while the truth is surpressed. Now we have all the facts we need they can't scam us on climate any longer, as new data has now filled the place of their made up cack and cannot be dismissed by anyone with nothing to contradict it but fears for the future. That is not a basis for policy.

Global warming- the enemy

Seeing as a British bishop just said people who deny global warming are as bad as the man who screwed his daughter and kept all the children locked up for 30 years, I'd include myself as an incestuous kidnapper. Or not. Which of us would you call sane?

Anyway, the case is nearing the close, and there are basically as usual two types of the global warming brigade, the leaders who know the truth (and profit from hiding it) and the majority, the followers whose only crime is being too trusting and not checking the facts, which alone can be found on my other site www.kingsbury.tk if they want to look.

I'll summarise the 2008 research situation: The research links are all on my other site.

Carbon dioxide has been shown to increase with temperature increase rather than before it. Therefore the fact all life on earth requires it we really should give it a break and not waste our time cutting emissions.

The latest research conceded extreme weather events are not likely to increase with temperature.

Sea level has risen very gradually for over a century as it continues to do. The current increase will not make any difference for a very long time and there is no way any melting ice could increase it for hundreds of years as there isn't enough to do so.

The ice has been melting and freezing as it always has. When winter comes much has frozen more than before after melting more than before. Creating space for winter ice by summer melts is nature's balance and although the ice has shifted worldwide hasn't actually decreased overall whatever they tell you.

So, with all the commonly held beliefs not actually real, here are a few more points.

Global warming, based on the same figures used to show it was when it was, has stopped. There has been no increase in average world temperatures this century. This was admitted by IPCC and added it's not likely to increase for ten more. So people are being taxed for... what? To stop climate stability?

The sort of temperature increases threatened, whether happen quickly or slowly, are within normal ranges over history. Extinctions normally took place in cold periods not warm ones, and if sea does rise it does it over centuries, so even animals are able to move away in time. It's not a tsunami. Most increases in deserts have been from intensive farming and not temperature.

So with oil running out, food shortages, and overpopulation to make these happen drastically faster, people are banging on about something that has the power of a basket of kittens. What would you prefer, a warmer world or nuclear waste from the 'clean/carbon neutral' nuclear power, and worry about this instead of issues that are actually here now and affecting everyone equally? You notice there's no UN action to educate people to breed less and bring down the prices of world resources, just rob us of the little we have.

More celebrity action!

Anyone in the UK with an interest in aliens and UFOs will know of Nick Pope, who was the government's UFO officer in the 90s and is now his full time career. I've been working for him as a volunteer since 2001, and this is the first time I've met him (today) since then as we live at opposite ends of London

Gender dysfunction

I've always been confused by people who wanted to change sex, and it just occurred to me that besides sex changes, then why can't people change every other quality they were born with as they 'feel different'? I used to be embarrassed about being Jewish as the English kids (back then that's all there were where I lived, not now) belonged and looked clean and white while I was a dirty tan colour.

So if I rejected my race and religion and decided I felt Christian or Buddhist would it make any difference? No, they'd see me exactly as I was before. Change your features on the outside, people will still tell, trust me. And inside it's always you whatever you do to look like a gentile.
Now had I been black, then what? Would I become a millionaire like Michael Jackson and have my whole body bleached (had it been possible) as well as drastic surgery, after which I would look just like a black person who had had surgery? Or if you just feel white but wouldn't change your appearance would have lived in Sout Africa, and assured the police who were about to beat your brains out for being in a white shop that you may have been born black but you were really white inside?

So how do men and women genuinely want to switch from who they unavoidably are? You are XXor XY. Every cell (billions) has the signature and cutting your cock and balls off may tell the world you're a fucking lunatic (my opinion anyway) but won't make your DNA different. As a therapist I would hope that anyone with gender confusion should have therapy to find why it's there and fix it than let it dominate you and ruin your life. You have XX or XY, you are a man or woman just as Michael Jackson is black. Realise that you have no more chance of becoming the opposite as he has. Be gay by all means as that is a desire not an identity, but there's no need to pretend you are something you can never be.

I've been tested

Freedom at last, I've spent 4 1/2 months playing 3 sets of quizzes a day plus a daily one, and it's now over. 8th in the world! I never expected that, and until it looked like I was doing well didn't plan to play them all but had to when it was clear my position was stable. And so glad I did now. So free, and technically nothing more. No fame, at least not yet from the promised and almost expected newspaper article. So although there was the potential for fame (as many others offer work from these articles, rather than being instantly recognised) I may still spend the rest of my life in obscurity. With no woman or income to speak of this was the one door to success that could make my life decent again. Not this time. So just freedom at the moment, and no other projects at all at the moment. Although most projects are sent to me, I can't actually initiate them myself so totally out of my hands.

The women are no better but that's been the same for years. The last one (boring and psychotic) went back with her old boyfriend, and probably the best thing. Three from Friends Reunited are unanimous in ignoring me, all sent messages one way or another and none have returned. Two are very distant which is what stopped much happening the first time, and one more of a friend who clearly doesn't want more now either. But so hard to meet anyone new dragging the past is the only method that could work for the handful of women who are currently single there. But I'm used to that now and fame brings everything else with it. But that's not here either so just the freedom.

No plans now, no need either. Having thought more and more about making sure the computer's working since January to play the quizzes, it won't matter now. I can go to bed whenever I want and the only useful project to follow would be to have another IQ test to join Mensa, but besides the practice I need to try not to be caught out like I was last time when I didn't (they ask you to but charge a fortune) there's no guarantee I'll pass of course. You can't get higher than your best but can easily get lower. I may have a go if the dry run tests get better results. Mensa is the other best way to meet women and friends, and opens the door to a good many jobs as well (no, I won't be looking) if you have it on the form.
So, a week ahead with a few work bookings and little else known. Nothing new there. And more potential for aggravation I needn't bore you with here. I will see.

Back again as usual

While I'm here and at a loose end (in more ways than one) I may as well return. It's been all sorts of chaos recently. First the bad news about my article (it was The Sun, 4 million potential readers probably down the drain) and then my grandma has a heart attack (but is recovering well).

In between I've had more work than usual, been in touch with more people from Friends Reunited (probably because it's now free so people can at last reply) and got a date for one of my TV programmes to be repeated (DMAX, 30th May 7.30am) in the UK that is. If anyone's got it set it to record Mystery Hunters and you can see me in action.
I've had to make all my own amusement this week, I see my grandma twice a week usually and that was of course not possible so I've also had to make all my own food and keep occupied. The friends I'd go and see in the past are nearly all gone or busy so no alternatives offered, I walk in parks, went food shopping today and bits of housework and gardening. The stray cat who ate and sat here when I wasn't here ran out of food and waited till I came in and asked for it. He now realises he'll be looked after and has decided to behave like a normal cat but really needs a bath.
And castration but I'm not up for that at the moment.

So with the article stillborn I'm back in empty nothing, the 4 1/2 month global quiz comes to an end next week so I'll be free to go to bed earlier so something, but all the women and media are currently non existent. My teacher said not to rely on the unreliable, and however its potential, the media are the most unreliable of the lot, worse even than estate agents. That was a massive lesson in non-attachment and I didn't get it the first time. But I'll never rely on the sods again until I see the stuff on TV or in print. It actually makes getting women look easy in comparison. Far more opportunities.

Well no more actual projects on the go now, I am arranging for someone to regress me to see if I've been abducted by aliens, but expecting very little there. But of course you can never see the big stuff coming, good or bad. Even when someone tells you you will.

Photos again

It's been a while so here are some more photos:


Isabella Plantation, Richmond Park

View from Horsendon Hill, Greenford.

More assorted shit

Life as usual is good in parts. The article is now in permanent limbo, officially shelved and unlikely ever to see the light of day except when sent to the bin. That's the media, and That's Life, in capitals, is because the same thing happened with a piece I did for them in 1992 or so, for BBC. They called me to come the same day when I was out, so as I wasn't available to film they sent a photographer the next day instead as the film crew was presumably on a tight schedule. Nothing followed. Shit happens when you work for the media.

Otherwise in my 4th global challenge quiz I qualified as immortal for the first time, the top 30 qualify and now the ones not including past immortals which is around 40. I came 9th already! I have to keep playing to keep the position, but a week or so from tomorrow it should be over. These are the top standard of players worldwide from leagues and TV quizzes so no poor competition but the best.
It was a busy week, more work than usual (usually happens in bunches) and that included a little gardening and dumping rubbish for someone I know without a car. From the 4th floor and 4 trips in the lift to do so. Not as simple as being on the ground floor like most of our rubbish would be. Never mind, it kept me busy. The week ahead is currently free and not one specific plan besides housework and gardening. I'll do some photo trips including Horsenden Hill which is a park in Greenford, although I suspect the photos will look like all the others it's an afternoon out. My days will still be scheduled for the 3 rounds of quizzes a day, split in 3 sections of 8 hours to play them plus a daily one. Then my time will be free for whatever else I want to do but well worth the effort put in so far.

Again, with nothing else known ahead I'm forced to live in the present, the article kept me concerned (quite rightly) for 4 months as my radar told me something was up from the first day. I can do that. It doesn't mean it won't happen but all felt wrong. And boy it was. How long has an editor kept an article before using it before? Who knows? A year? 10 years? I reckon a few months and then they're binned. So as far as I'm concerned that was my chance to get in the papers and now the only way I'll make it is on terrestrial TV which is far more likely as I have a track record. Maybe (as Al suggested) if I get a unique selling point I could become the swearing hypnotist. OK, it's been done before for cooks, but at least I'd enjoy it.

'What did the alien do next?' 'It pulled down my trousers' 'Fuck me, I hope you didn't have a stiffy!' etc. Totally juvenile but look where it's got Gordon Ramsay. Sadly without his F word (Fuck not food unlike the programme of that name) he'd probably still be on GMTV (if he ever was). I personally wouldn't get up that early for anything (OK, maybe the once...).
The next victim, er, woman on my list hasn't called back since I called last week so I assume she is a) no longer single and b) not interested even if she is. One down, who's next? My cleaner? A stranger on the internet as long as they live locally? No one else so I expect I will. I tried one on Facebook and when I clicked her profile it crashed my computer. Twice! Would someone put a virus on their website just to piss people off? Sorry, I meant 'Can' someone put a virus etc, as of course many would but can they? I suspect if an email can then anything else can. If so I'm reporting her.

So, a dead or alive week ahead, sod all to look forward to (nothing unusual there) and all the nice people who commented on the blog recently seem to have vanished. OK, I've been a bit busy to comment myself recently but now you guys know I'm here it would be nice to hear some more.
I know one does pornographic stories, I used to do the odd filthy pages myself but although I suspect they were more popular than the personal stuff they are all a variation on a theme (cock, prick, wank, fart, dog's business, massive erections, tampons, rectums, back door scuttles and now wash your hands). You see what I mean. So short of rearrange the same words and phrases within varying situations to increase the viewers at least my life (and yours) can never be exactly the same each day so report that as usual. A few (ie the great minority) people are still throwing global warming stats at me but the actual figures are so easy to recall after 7 years studying them I can put away every ball for a 6. How and why they continue to believe in the face of evidence frightens me as there are so many sheep out there who will swallow any old crap if supposed to be official. Think for yourselves! Look up the sources they give. Use logic. These stories are good on the surface with nothing behind them, like the Wizard of Oz. It's all one man lying to you. And robbing you. I have no doubt, I may not be able to put a case to disprove God exists (I have tried) but global warming is a holiday. Unless it's all being done by Father Christmas- he would be ideal to use the rest of his time in the year to sit at the North Pole melting the ice. Except it's growing. Sod it, another theory bites the dust...

How the media works

As I will make things worse saying what I want to the people responsible, I'll lay it out here. After almost half a year the article in the newspaper I contributed to may well be pulled. It was set to coincide with the Ministry of Defence (UK) UFO files being released, which happened yesterday. I finally checked up and was told their priorities had changed. I saw this coming when the interviewer said it would be out in a week or two and months had passed, except they did say it was waiting for the files to come out. My career has taken 48 years to develop (if you include my early years contributed) and as any PR agent will know, a career in the media has a few steps. I took the first and easily biggest, to get on TV.

Stage one TV, small niche channels with tiny viewing figures but repeated ad infinitum. Unpaid. That was fine, it would do but would never make me famous. The next steps were either/and going on terrestrial TV with a million plus viewers/being in a newspaper. Well this year I was interviewed, the media equivalent of having an offer accepted on a house. It's half the job done but not binding or final. The bible has a little very trite wisdom in it and planting seeds on stony ground is one. They work like stink, send photographers (who do get paid) all over the country, and use a fraction of the material. I have no control over who wants me and when, and unless one of these two steps happen I will not have a proper media career. From having a firm date to know about this article (ie yesterday) not only has any timeframe gone out of the window but probably the whole lot. I felt this was dodgy from after I did it, I am very sensitive to these sort of negative vibes although not reading the future (these are picked up from the truth behind the present facades) they can change. But I felt they were not serious about the whole thing and that at least was spot on the money. Except I didn't get any of that either.

Of course you have to consider these guys get paid whatever they do. If their editors and owners are happy for them to use a fraction of what they produce and sling out the rest, in fact it's their choice to do so, why should they care? Our careers, business and pleasure, are by-products of other people's aims and wishes and like a ricochet bullet doesn't know or care who it hits. If someone walks down your road and either drops a £20 note or treads on your tortoise, they don't actually notice at the time or intend the consequences, it just happens to you by chance through their actions. The fact someone's whole career can be made by a single article (trust me, I've studied the business) illustrates perfectly how something irrelevant and everyday to one is the whole life for another. Now as people only state a positive, no one will let me know if it's not going to be used, I'll only know if it is. Otherwise I'll just be reading the signs when I've heard nothing within a month and work it out for myself. NB I rarely if ever call people cunts, but I think I'm justified in this case. Pardon me.

Current details (pun intended)

Stone me, less blogging and more living for a change. It happens. And even some work.
I seem to have this mission (along with many others) of refuting every plausible and less plausible appeal by the world's rulers to reduce our carbon footprints. In effect it means 'Please reduce your activities to those of the dark ages and pay us for the privilege'

I only have one thing to say to every propagandist who is promoting the evil lie of man made global warming:

"FUCK YOU!"

Right, now I've got that little message off my chest, I'll go over my current plans. Besides writing this on my new laptop (they really are cheap as chips now, or a tank of petrol, and the old one was dying by the day) the other little projects are slowly coming on, with end of the month deadlines. My global quiz has a week before I graduate, all things (ie computer reliability) being equal, and after 3 before the practice has raised me to 9th in the world, against some of the best players around. Three weeks maximum to complete that one, maybe less. More when it finishes.
Currently nothing needed to do this week beyond the usual little bookings, and unless a woman or psychic event takes my attention am tending to play timed quizzes in my dreams. It's an incredible workout for the mind, your memory becomes sharper and faster and your logic improves working out the right answers from four options. So not a waste of time or effort in any way.

Plans include (besides gardening) little more than waiting and hoping at the moment really. I've got more alien abductee work coming up ahead including being regressed myself, and the hypnotist is now ready. Last week dealt with most of the big admin jobs, car MOT sorted out, professional renewal sent off etc, so the work is over for now although the renewal is never automatic. I'm still promoting Tesla technology as the answer to the energy crisis (which sadly is real) and like my campaign against the global warming monster lie, will keep going and currently aiming to get a prototype generator built from spreading the word to enough people who could do it. I've seen many new technologies disproved, but no one's ever done so with Tesla. And if correct there'd be little need to invent anything else as if you can generate power by magnetic induction (not that I know how he did it but that's the closest I can make out) it's easy as piss and almost free to do as the paired generators amplify the power to more or less infinity (according to the articles I've read).

One thing that also interests me is why no one's ever tried to sell me global warming here. Most forums have their sheep who genuinely believe I'm evil or misguided, and like born again Christians must try and save my soul from the devil of disbelief. Maybe because they can't find a word to disagree with? I suspect the same reason no one's ever sued David Icke for libel when he calls powerful people criminals is because he may actually be telling the truth. There are few other defences to libel.

Why Al Gore is the antichrist

No matter how much you know the rules, don't rely on the unreliable etc as taught by my master, Prem Rawat, you still have to live with a world which is unreliable and offers far more than it can ever deliver. I have about 2 weeks left to know if my newspaper article will be used, and at 48 am pretty overdue for the successful career I've been building all my life. One of my clients has just got his first paying media job through me, and may well become a household face if the work is what I'm expecting. More when I know. Otherwise I do have my freedom currently and am using it to the best of my ability.

Unlike many, along with my personal campaign to quash the monster of global warming (the story, not the temperature rise), and such cack as 'building an house from carbon friendly materials rather than bricks and mortar' on Channel 4 just now, which tests even my strong stomach, am working to replace the nonsense with something real. I've been promoting the Wardenclyffe Tower http://www.teslascience.org/ which is the only clean energy generator known to work, built 100 years ago and stopped as soon as JP Morgan discovered the electricity was free to users, but after it was made and shown to work. Cheap oil was used since, the project being forgotten by all but enthusiasts like myself, and now oil is no longer cheap or readily available (quote, OPEC this week, who will not be increasing production to meet demand), the time has come to use the old and known methods dropped when uneconomic for the powers that be.
I'm sending a message to all who can promote this for me, and one by one each organisation will be informed in the hope one will realise the wind turbines Shell just dropped as they worked out they don't work, and solar panels are not the answer. You don't replace oil with fuel that costs even more, that's fucking stupid and causing even more poverty than relying on what oil we've got left. Or electric cars which are less powerful than the gokarts I drove in France when I was 10. And they forgot the essential point. When you plug in the electric car for half a day to get 50 miles usage out of it, where does the power come from? Er, power stations fuelled by oil. Just move the problem up the chain, like sweeping the shit under the carpet. I know the resistance to new/new old ideas, and skeptical attitudes of authority, but the Tesla tower is shown to work and JP Morgan did not invest in schemes before he knew they worked. Or he's an idiot.

So, Al Gore is the antichrist, I must be the opposite, doing all I can to reverse the damage this Nobel Prize winning liar has done to the realm of truth. Not libel god forbid, a British court showed 17 (token) lies in his film, they probably ran out of time to note the rest. And paying carbon credits for all his travels to, er, himself. Yes, a shining example of Nobel Prize material if ever we needed one. And Hitler missed out? Surely his attempt to purge the world of Jews was almost as noble as Gore's attempt to wipe out CO2? Both were mad and both had millions of followers who were, frankly, no better. Use discrimination. Don't accept some BBC twat who tells you temperatures will go up 4 degrees after your kids have had grandchildren and died, and it's your fucking fault. Don't trust the spivs who try and sell you solar panels they know will take that long to pay back the thousands you spend on them while they fire their houses by gas and oil.

As David Icke says, simply seeing through a lie makes it lose its power, and my often thankless task is to point out those lies wherever I can, until one by one a person at a time sees through it. And the opposition rarely kill us now, they just call us mad. Like that's supposed to stop us being correct. 'Don't listen to the scientists who say man made global warming isn't real, they're all mad' is all they say now. Not 'Their measurements are wrong' or 'I can show you why CO2 is warming up the planet'. They can't you see. The planet's been the same for 10 years and now they say will continue to remain the same for 10 more. Now pardon me if I don't see the urgency in switching my car for a bus.

Global warming, case closed.

My personal research into global warming has reached its conclusion and I reckon enough evidence for every neutral (not carbon neutral!) to agree. What started as a light hearted extra in the end of a few news reports as a wonderful relief to the impending ice age predicted for the previous 20 years became a man eating monster within a decade. People can, however deceived, see through a lie if it carries on long enough. It can't be maintained as evidence of the truth slowly creeps through the farago of nonsense they put up.

In the last few weeks the final nails went in the coffin. Studies showed world average climate stopped rising in 1998 (and only rose and fell for a few decades at a time prior to that regardless of industrial activity). So there is actually nothing called global warming, in the present anyhow. It's actually global cooling now as temperatures have been dropping now since December.
Then it was announced hurricanes and tornadoes did not increase with temperature, and actually went down a little. Another fear removed. And (this takes some research currently as it changes so much it's hard to find the full picture) after the great polar melts followed the great polar freeze. What melts big time freezes big time, that's nature.

Other experts are now admitting there are unlikely to be many deaths should there be global warming as the number of people dying of the cold now would more than cancel out anyone dying from heat or flooding, except the sea level figures which are rising have risen steadily at almost bugger all for over a century. And if they carry on at that level for another century they will have risen at very slightly more than bugger all, making bugger all difference even for the many generations to come that haven't yet been born the global warming promoters are warning of.
I could go on, but as a panel said on the radio, if this lot alone was presented in defence to a jury having heard the case for the prosecution none in the world could find them guilty beyond reasonable doubt. Firstly a crime has to have been committed first, and the propaganda continues to repeat old predictions of 2-10' in a century as they haven't got a lot more to go on, plus the long discredited 'hockey stick' diagram, which started this whole fiasco off and moves now under its own momentum even after the engine's gone off. I have a legal background and smelt a rat as soon as the words 'carbon tax' were mentioned, plus the fact no one had reported any of the phenomena we were told would be associated with global warming. In fact studies taken from the many times it had been warmer in the past showed few people suffered and as we all know, it costs money to heat a house and nothing to freeze in the winter if you don't. There's no historic precedent for said disasters predicted, quite the opposite.
Anyhow, one by one scientists are having to admit each guess or measurement was wrong and sooner or later the governments will be forced to stop taxing us for something that no longer warrants the payment. In legal terms that would be called obtaining money by deception and the same juries would have no trouble finding them guilty of that. Criminal at worst and naive at best, but led by criminals who knew exactly what they were up to.
But do you think they'll give our money back when the gaff has been blown? My bum they will...

I've been.

For a change I've been busy this week (well, last week now). First private tuition job for 10 years, birthday party with live band and other things too trivial to mention but included getting a matching red mouse for the laptop I'm using now. I'm free now and besides a few little arrangements ahead am down to my own devices.

Within 3 weeks the wait to know about my newspaper article will be over, it'll be in or out and that's it, no way round the result whichever way it goes. Mind you, the last disappointment when I was told I'd be on Sky One on a certain date, then it wouldn't actually be Sky One but mobile phones (give me strength...) and then not even completed I felt that would be my last shot at the bigger time (ie getting a million TV viewers). Then I was filmed for US TV although I have no idea how many people watched it (the figures aren't shared like they are here in public) it won't make me known this side of the Atlantic. Then the newspaper interview. Admittedly these are even rarer than TV appearances but just because they may never use it doesn't mean the last career chance ever.

I have a little project finally set up now which could make the global warming story fade into the background. My long search for alternative energy appears over with a long overlooked method of generating power, and have found places to distribute this information. I suspect hardly anyone in authority knows about this technology and no checks I've made have failed to demonstrate its successful applications. The plans already exist and no more work would be needed to build a prototype and see it work worldwide.

Otherwise it's a free week ahead, photos in such wonderful places as Shepherds Bush, Ladbroke Grove (if not in the charging zone) and Maida Vale. Mainly for postcode and station pictures and I'm bound to get some good random people in the crowds. The last time I took the camera to Shepherds Bush was in 2002 to get Routemaster buses before they were withdrawn, and went from Willesden Garage to Notting Hill, I don't think there was much doing when I actually got to the Bush itself. And then Cockfosters. Someone has to.
I can't honestly see a lot happening in the way of actual excitement besides a possible meeting in the near or middle future, I've virtually written the article off now after such a long wait and will just keep on with the photos and pictures and see if I can sell any more. And with enough evidence collected that global warming is now over and has been for years waiting for that news to reach the mugs who believe the crooks that tell them it exists, or may do after they've died. Many people believe the kingdom of heaven awaits them when they die and spend their whole lives preparing for it while they miss the present. My present has more holes than cheese much of the time but I'm putting all my chips on life not death thank you. You know it makes sense.

Maharaji on religion

Listen to the voice of sense when it comes to religion, this guy knows what he's talking about and offers the real thing, not the rules and regualtions.

Another week in Kingsbury

Another week has passed, and it's been a collection of random events, from taking photos in Tottenham (mainly for the postcodes from road signs for a group) to meeting an online friend who was passing through on his way back to Nigeria yesterday.

I went to a local photo shop of historical pictures to try and sell my albums, and they said they needed to be wholesaled, costing me about £2000 so I didn't bother. It would take most of my life to sell that many by hand like the first lot I did in 1995 which took me over a year and hundreds of miles. One more route eliminated. I also saw the results of the garden photography competition which weren't that different to a couple I entered. How they choose I can't tell but I'm not far off the requirements in comparison.

I've also done heaps more research on global warming simply because more facts are being released every week now. It's impossible to accept there's an issue at all anymore, the evidence has totally fallen apart and new admissions admit even if it happens extreme weather won't increase so what's the fuss about? I now have no doubts and no longer take any notice of the excuses given in reply by the warmists as I know where they are coming from, ie the imaginations of the politicians and mistaken scientists who 10 years later are gradually contradicting their findings. There is no more case and before more people suffer the consequences of criminal taxes and restrictions on more and more areas of normal life the truth has to prevail. Food prices have doubled mainly by swapping its use to biofuel thus creating an artificial shortage. More ways to cripple third world industry on top of the grants for fucking wind turbines that don't actually work. Those are given instead of other forms of aid, not as well as by the way.

I have an unknown week ahead really, more photo trips as per, stations this time, Harrow and maybe Kentish Town. Let's hope I get something better to do when this list runs out, one more in my album will make the 5000 mark in 2 1/2 years. I'm down to my last 2 media projects, waiting years for the final programme to come on and weeks for the newspaper to shit or get off the pot regarding my article. Articles I should way, a week's worth, including mine. That would be a lot of wasted work if they didn't use it and god forbid an insight into the world of media if so. I hope not.

So, I was so busy I didn't update here for a week. Makes a change everyone thinks, and they're right.

Latest roundup.

Things are happening one by one, here's a photo of event one. Jonty from last year's Big Brother came out with me last week after I found him on Facebook and told him our parents knew each other. That was the first person I had any connection with in it until the teenage version next with a girl I knew from when her mother was pregnant with her, Calista Robertson. If you wait long enough even in this overpopulated country you'll find someone you know when picked randomly sooner or later.



Meanwhile 3 more stories have surfaced adding to the evidence of global warming being made up crap. Originally when it hit the news it was a quaint and irrelevant bit of 'and finally' fluff. 'Oh good' everyone thought, they thought there would be an ice age and now we can all relax, at last the weather may actually be improving and we can save some energy on heating bills and have cheaper food.
Suddenly it became serious. Despite no actual warming taking place (all based on bogus predictions for after we'll all be dead so can't prove them), we were hit by policies. Tax, alternative energy (inefficient and expensive) and worst of all nuclear power. Clearly fossil fuel is running out but why make a case for global warming to poison us all with radiation which really is dangerous?

One by one scientists are leaving the religion behind, the latest being the Scrabble winning name Miklos Zagoni (127 on triple word), who realised something was amiss when NASA refused to release new data showing their guesses/estimates were wrong. He used to be a high priest of warmism, until he saw through it the way so many people do with no influence from the propaganda at all. Losing $5billion of funding would ruin the party for so many in the global warming collective anything that threatens to end it will be kept hidden as long as possible. Hence my efforts to spread the truth wherever I can.

Canada's Carleton University have affirmed what I keep saying, carbon dioxide doesn't affect climate, the sun does. With the sunspots hitting a cyclic minimum it will now get colder for 50-100 years (as it is now) and soon it will be impossible to believe in warming when there is no evidence anywhere on earth.

And finally the polar ice is refreezing faster as there was more room to freeze when it melted. This is called a natural balance and the polar bears are up all night celebrating.

If only these stories were picked up more by the big papers and TV then the politicians would have to find new ways of clipping our wings. I teach people one by one, either the don't knows or with any the luck, worth even more, the converts. Instead of believing the crap they tell us, quote the facts that show it is rather than accept a temperature taken elsewhere that means nothing. Have you noticed it getting warmer and if so do you think it has spoilt the quality of your life?

A little bit more politics

I think I can say progress is being made. My DVD from America of my latest programme has now arrived and I'm in it twice as long as any of the others. Another social arrangement has been made and Nigel Lawson has just written a book telling people not to panic about global warming.

Now I just had an email from a good friend too distant to meet in person who backed up my efforts to spread the truth. This clarified what my little political campaigning is about, it's creating a legal style case breaking the illusions the evil bastards who make the rules tell us is the case. Many other people also see through it and do nothing, I look for the facts (easy as wetting yourself now we have the internet) and make a case. I won't insult people for believeing in lies as they are being scammed, not scamming, yet many insult me for trying to help not just them but the viral effects they have passing on these lies.

It's getting late again and whether I'm free tomorrow is debatable so not sure if I should go to bed in case. I also now have a rough date for if and when my article may come out, or not at all. I suppose fame is the same as having a qualification, you can say the same thing but people won't listen to you without either. I've done with the qualifications and now need the fame to add some real authority. Unlike anything else in life it is reasonably within anyone's power to do as there are basic rules to follow and they do work. Some people become famous by chance but it's possible to make a decision as well and put everything you have into making it happen. The money and the new friends would be a bonus but not essential parts of it.

Now I was a little disappointed no one complained about my last entry, as it probably means hardly anyone read it as it's the sort of stuff likely to attract nastiness. But there was none. When I said women weren't as comfortable about having sex as men I got a right bollocking although it's the gospel truth. How many women do you know who think 'I fancy a shag' and go to a pub and pick up a man? Case closed. It just don't happen. And oddly it's probably not biological but 99.9% cultural. We both do it so why should men be free to look and try wherever they can and women pretend they don't want it? Crap. I have no idea if and when women worldwide decided to take this passive and often hostile position but I doubt it's been permanent. Probably since Queen Victoria who from the photos was extremely lucky to get it once considering her husband could actually see. She looked like a troll. I can just imagine her with purple hair and a hole in her backside to put a pencil in.

Anyway, how the mind can wonder. The last thing I expected to be writing about was Queen Victoria's appearance but once free association has been warmed up it will always work. I'm not writing a song so it doesn't have to rhyme, so there are no restrictions to work within besides good English and presentation which we can all only try our best. And behind 4 years of blogging I have over 40 of marked assignments virtually to the present day (continuing professional development says so) and if I can't write properly now I never will. To answer the critic last month, yes, it's got me about 3 lines of letters after my name. And they don't give those away for fags, not in my country anyway.

Global bollocks, as usual

Before I start I think I forgot to say, the day I got all that aggravation in the comment boxes the hit logger counted about 120 hits for that day. Every other had about 3 but for some reason not only did I get 3 (unnecessary) comments for the first time in ages but where did the hits come from? Needless to say it was back to about 5 the next day but go figure.

Well with the slightly warmer weather and much longer days I've (guess what) been out with the camera even more. I've got every NW postcode for the group now and started on BR stations for my own. Unlike the tickets which I collected country wide everyone just sends pictures of their local ones so we have a record of them all. Mind you I've got plenty on film camera from all over the place and more on video. Then I had a reason to travel around but when they axed the old tickets in 1988 all I had was another 8 years of free handwritten passes and Isle of Wight ferry tickets. I'd never been to Portsmouth so much since I used to stay with my friend there. And the Isle of Wight for that matter. I missed the queen by minutes at Portsmouth Harbour as the place was swarming with police so I thought I'd better avoid any trouble. 10 minutes later she'd been and gone. Typical. Lucky I saw her already by similar chance out on walkabout in Essex nearly 40 years earlier.

I also found what could be the world's most expensive cakes when I took a friend from Manchester to a local hotel and the bill for the only food in the bar came in at £5 each for little chocolate brownies. The only tip they would have got was the tip of my raised middle finger. Bastards.
Well the media work is slightly further progressed in that the film of my last show is now on its way so I can watch it at last. Having been told the article is to be timed roughly with government ufo files release I suspect they're waiting to release them at the same time now, although they'd need an inside leak to know when it would be. I don't care as long as it's used. And while I'm still alive of course.

Meanwhile the BBC have almost totally taken up the propaganda role for global warming, the latest programme tonight contained more unfounded pony with no balance that the actual premise may be based on nothing at all. They can't actually prove any warming we are having (currently less than a degree in the last 100 years and dropping right now) is caused by us at all, so why create a worldwide campaign to tax us and cripple third world emerging industry, not to mention promote deadly nuclear power as an alternative when there's not a shred of proof carbon dioxide (ours or from natural causes) is behind it? A geography teacher called the radio to say he teaches both sides and the kids have more sense and can work out the truth themselves. Unfortunately just like with the anti Israel crap I'm forced to learn all the truth or end up back in a concentration camp myself, and unlike that with global warming I can't just be on the defensive for the occasional anti semite but constantly preaching in advance as the warmists have all the big media pouring out their constant stream of hot (and poisonous) air every day.

It's only blogs and radio presenters who seem independent enought to dare to disagree with the blinding nonsense the other side present as graphs and projections based on future guesses and temperatures taken in city centres. Then when faced with actual CO2 figures they say a few more parts per million will tip us into armageddon. And if I fart I'll wipe out half of London. Please.

Take my word and others for it, governments and big business do not work for our benefits. They help each other and we just get in the way. That's why immigration has taken over Britain by letting anyone and everyone come here from the lowest criminal gangs or third world countries where they've never even seen a toilet let alone learnt to speak English. Few other countries in the world would tolerate these two classes in their countries if they sneaked in yet we open the borders and who do they turn away? Yes, Americans. They don't let us in so if one doesn't fill the form in dead right then they get the bayonet up the jacksie and the next flight back to Ellis Island. It proves they can do it but only with the undesirables they don't want, not what we don't want as citizens. If you can honestly say you're happy with people who come to your country and spit in the street in packs of extended families, create queues in every council and national health office while needing interpreters when they are seen to, are all given benefits despite not even being here legally and then to top it all told they can stay as they've been here too long to be deported. Not to mention the housing benefit scams where they create 100 family members and claim for them all. Many have done it for 10 years before being caught while honest claimants are prosecuted for exceeding the statutory bank balance by a few pounds and not telling the DSS as they didn't notice.

This is not right or left wing or even that political. It's just reporting the UK government policies of the last decade that have turned an average country (it was never that wonderful, not since the 60s) into one where we'll soon be leaving in droves for the very places many people came here a few decades ago from. I reckon many more people would rather live in Jamaica now than London, if they were allowed in of course.

Progress or not

Yes I have returned. If anyone thinks my stories are boring you should just try living them instead. Thinking of new things to do every day on your own while promises of media success fade into oblivion is a lot harder than reading about it. And I may start banning anonymous comments again if people haven't got the balls to firstly speak as themselves and secondly write a blog of their own.

I've actually been pretty busy since then, just little local trips but found various little things along the way including an amazing painting for next to nothing I'm now looking for a place to hang. One person I've been waiting for is now around although we haven't arranged an actual meeting date yet. Other than that it's officially less than 3 months till the Ministry of Defence release their first UFO files, and that is what my newspaper article is about. Now if they don't publish it by then it's not going to look very clever. I assume they will know before everyone else with official sources (and unofficial) so will be ready to print, although they said they wanted it done before their release. Not a bloody clue.

It's pretty clear ahead so far (including work wise). I can't think of one profession less reliable than being a therapist as you never know how many times people will come or where the new ones will arrive from. Advertising has no effect and nearly all my customers are from a national directory everyone finds when looking for someone. For those who questioned my credentials to practice I may as well present them now in case there was any doubt.

I finished my degree in law, and rather than become a solicitor after a tough year's further study I preferred to return to my original interest and took a 3 year part time certificate and diploma at counselling at what is now (as is my polytechnic) a university. I then took hypnotherapy and psychotherapy courses to reach the top level of accredited counsellor. That's as good as it gets and the jobs are still nearly impossible to get as the few there are either want women, ethnic minorities, female ethnic minorities or ex drug addicts. ie nothing that applies to me. Plus many jobs advertised are for volunteers. 6 years as a volunteer before and after qualifying was quite enough for me and you never see jobs advertised for volunteers in any other profession, but they think 'counsellors=mugs'. The government do as they haven't recognised it as a profession at all so technically you don't get anything for a qualification, hence my lack of a job.
I worked in a shop while getting the post diploma experience and extra qualifications needed to progress, I was made redundant, applied for hundreds of jobs, got 3 interviews and eventually 1 job in another shop (manager this time) which lasted a week before the place was closed down.

But the media connections I've made since then, although paid not a button or a biscuit have guaranteed three TV appearances show worldwide and another in the pipeline. The fact I've even been used for a national paper article, used or not, means the potential is there, and that would be what is needed to move from unknown volunteer seen by thousands to paid professional seen by millions. I don't know whether this is my only chance to get there, or others may arise afterwards, but job or no job it would have been impossible to do the research and travel London following up experts who claim amazing powers and ufo experiencers. It's not about working, it's about paying the bills. And if you can pay the bills without a job then you lot (you know who you are) should be worshipping me and others like me, not vice versa as you believe. Who's the mug here, you lot working 40+ hours a week with a mortgage hanging over you or me wondering what to do with all my free time?

Maybe the nasty face of jealousy has arisen...

To all readers this applies to

Interesting. I have to go over the last comments individually here as so much was raised.

Firstly I am relieved people still come here, when I added the counter I had 50 hits a day for almost a year. Then through no fault of my own blogger disabled profile links for a year and the place went down the toilet. Since they returned it's been very slow to recover.

It is interesting, however accurate the observations, how some people (and thank goodness a vocal minority) feel drawn to judge anyone not like them, and under the cowardly cover of anonymity. The old rule 'if you don't have anything nice to say don't say it at all' is as foreign to them as Australia is to me. But they also clearly haven't the balls to write about their own lives but use others who do to make them feel better about theirs.

This site was created as one of the rare free gifts in the world. Most others have paid upgrades, spyware or other unwanted catches, but blogger has none and never has. So I take full advantage of it, no posting limits, no regulation. How much better could it be? So feel free to observe people's lives who have gone in a totally different (but probably no worse and possibly a lot better) way to your own but just think, how would I feel if I was in the same position?

What a week (and it's only Wednesday)

Am I on the verge of insanity? Talking to myself (this is no different) is my last resort, if the cat's here it seems OK as there's a recipient who does listen although she barely understands. And the viewing figures here are worrying now as well, although they are higher than the corresponding comments.

So, nothing's happened full stop. I make my own news and have a list of jobs I'd rather not do and are mainly for following rules and regulations, not choice. Plus people I don't want to see really if I contact them. That has kept me to taking photos and doing housework this week and really aren't sure whether the newspaper article will be used now although it's a whole week's feature. Without that I have my minor projects, a TV programme that's a spark in the mind of the producer at the moment, seeing myself on a DVD if it ever gets here, and meeting a few new people I do want to. Plus one I have met already. Those are the possibles but only the newspaper and woman will make much difference, plus one other person. I have a huge collection of pretty good photos now, and one job is taking the albums to a local shop to try and sell plus more to the library. Then the next album is ready to create, in fact probably the next two as one is a different theme.

So tomorrow has got me to the point of having little else to do besides this job which will be good if works, even though they do sale or return and even a sale is at cost price as I pay retail already, my work is being seen. They're in two places so far and do get good feedback the rare times I get any. I can only plan ahead a day at a time as it takes all my resources to get enough for one day before I do the next. That's good as it's living in the present, although the lack of good news is not making it the quality it could be. I've had no work for 2 weeks but don't mind, although one person is pissing me around majorly and that is unfair. Beyond the call of duty. I've done little bits of tidying although how larger items like trousers and filofaxes can vanish along with smaller like pens I'll never know. The five people here on New Year's Eve were honest enough when my Parker vanished although I was warned one was not what she seems. I hope she didn't take it and still can't imagine what else could have happened to it. Not a personal favourite but a Parker is a Parker.

Other than that next month the results come out of the photo competition I entered but have slightly more chance getting in the finals than I would in the lottery. There are more articles coming out where top scientists are slowly beginning to stand up against the global warming con, and they all go in my file and website. Think about it, a few more parts per million of a natural and essential gas causing slightly higher temperatures like we had thousands of years ago is not something to get worried or excited about. But it provides a fantastic excuse to tax us and persecute third world economies who are catching us up. And divert us from real issues we could do something about. Even in Darfur and Rwanda before it the UN keep their distance as they wouldn't dare touch their fellow Muslims when they are ripping people's heads off. No, far more important to stop westerners using their cars and stop us throwing away our toxic rubbish for two weeks. Those are real policies compared with saving lives where they might get hurt and suffer in trying to do so. Like the police, always go for the easy targets.

So, after 20-30 years the world has become a really nasty place. When I remember the relative innocence of the 60s and 70s where you had the bad guys (Russia, Cuba, Vietnam etc) and the good guys (everyone else) we knew where we stood. A few politicians were crooked and lost their careers as a result. Now it comes with the job. Not to mention the overpopulation which is the real cause of oil and resource shortages. Will they do a thing to stop that? The hell they will. Only China tried to keep their population down and were widely condemned for doing the only sensible thing they've done in my lifetime. Sometimes the truth hurts and for some reason I am more aware of it than most. My gift and my burden. But truth is the most powerful thing there is, but means the liars will try and get you silenced and their victims will believe it's you and not them who are lying. But you can't pretend you're not pregnant for long and you can't pretend the world climate is going down the toilet either when after so many years nothing happens.

Insulting times

I am running out of things to do. Leisure is great especially if you're still paying your bills, but there's only so much you can do on your own. Believe it or not my latest trip is from a group which collects photos of London postcodes. So I'll drive round as many as I can until they have them all from the members. Otherwise I'd have nowhere at all left to go. I've been all over the place taking photos and videos, and found a Beatles shop with all their old pictures (copies) this week at the station for Abbey Road, and may now spend a packet (for me) on posters from the company who made them.

How your life is shown up under a spotlight when you're relying on one thing to happen to change your life (which usually doesn't, as in this case) makes you realise how little there actually is. OK it's flexible, people do come and go all the time and having decided having dubious people around is far worse than no one as you can do as you please has meant currently all I see is my family. I really wonder now if the newspaper will use the article or it was just another possible project if they decided people would like it enough. Tragic really if so. Now I know my programme for Sky TV (which wasn't going on TV) was not shown as the production company went bust it does explain their reluctance to communicate with me. I assumed it was Sky who were pissing around but they told me they have to wait till the series is finished, which is currently being done, so they tell me. I've still had no DVD of my 3rd TV showing in America, that's after being told they didn't even want me to have one. I am working with some total spastics here and no mistake. At least in the blog world you're still able to use words like spastic, cretin and mongol and the worst that can happen is someone makes a comment, which would be the first for months so please do, it means someone's actually read it.

Anyone over 40 will remember the innocence of the playground where we had spastic and racist jokes and people freely called each other morons, imbeciles, cretins, mongols, spastics, cripples, and anything else from a Victorian medical dictionary. Now it's non PC you can easily go to a primary school in the poorer parts of Britain and instead of them you'll hear 'fucking cocksucker' 'motherfucker' 'retard' and 'your mother's a whore'. Now can anyone honestly tell me these American and Arabic imports are actually better than innocent medical terminology for the mentally ill from the 1800s? No you can't. If you create a hole something else will fill it, and if you decide to criticise one of the little darlings on a bus for vandalising it or having the music on too loud you'll discover exactly what I mean. "Go fuck yourself loser" is a lot worse then someone waving their arms around making spastic noises. You can't stop kids being nasty, all you can do is change the nature of how they do it.
Political correctness is for the totalitarian dictatorships and not the once free boroughs of London now under the gulag mentality Ken Livingstone and (restricted) Transport for London. They are the true fascists and by restricting what normal people say and do, ie speak and travel, they are demonstrating who the true arseholes are.

Makes a change

Oh christ on a bike... Big Brother's on TV in advance now, from America. Total crap but means I have to stop it taking over my life again. One which, through living 20 minutes from the house, has overlapped somewhat with my own in the last few years.

Anyway. My first year at college was spent training to be an accountant. Although I switched due to lack of technical ability, my desire to organise and represent everything in life remains. My current week is very much a debit and credit list. On the debit side not one of my media projects is in contact with me so I have no idea if they'll happen next week, next month or not at all. I have now reached the stage where they literally may lead to fame so bloody important ones now. I also found someone who paid me compliments way over the top of reality finally told me what a cunt she's thought I was for some time (my paraphrase, hers was worse!), which came as no surprise, the only surprise was that she kept coming back for more before she finally cracked. Big deal.

On the plus side I got both my mail orders from abroad today and now have two little model rabbis on my windowsill. I've got a book from the 70s probably arriving tomorrow as well I used to read constantly at school but never bought, although I bought another in the series. They probably cost the equivalent of £20 each at the time so probably explains why I could only stretch to one. I have pretty little to do this week so far, business or pleasure, but always make the most of the freedom whatever the potential. I'm planning a tour of the cafes that have sprung up in the local parks, although I recently gained 2 inches round my waist. Being underemployed and single means you have to make the best of very little for a very long time.

In the month or two since I did my newspaper interview I've kept extremely busy and forced myself to compensate for having no hope besides a single issue, which is competely tragic. No newspaper but my life has been dragged into near normality by sheer effort and making something out of very little things like riding the bike and shopping in Golders Green. The small collection of old TV videos I've also picked up along the way has helped, so they are no longer distant memories but available at any time, and whole episodes unlike Youtube. In the 31/2 years since I started here few posts have been positive, and probably with good reason at the time. So today is, although fairly neutral I am trying to be the balance between neutral and positive. Just shows what's possible. I just hope a few people read it here to find out.

Religion and more

Firstly, two observations on religion. One, we pour scorn in tribal religions and sun worshippers, but what on earth difference are they from our modern or popular ones? Are the bible stories any less outlandish or have I missed something.
If you compare the delusions of the average schizophrenic there is little difference besides the huge number who accept the religious ones.
Next, the comfort God gives to his followers is no different to a sugar pill. If you look close enough at religion it's founded on nothing. There's nothing there. If people have found a way to feel good for no reason then just use that without the nonsense.

Now back to reality. My neighbour pissed around on the computer yesterday and it's running around 250hz now. No idea why but something's got in. I can't even do a virus scan as it's too slow for that. I cleaned the disk but no effect. System restore next step.

Otherwise it's been another busy week, and got a few essential jobs out of the way. One was returning a library book to my school after 37 years. I knew it was here but hadn't got round to taking it until I had to contact them about something else. The secretary was pretty nice as well. A good reason to return for the full tour I turned down today (nowhere to park for starters). I've really narrowed down my list of awaited news to two items. The rest are irrelevant. All that's happened so far is my 3rd pair of Status Quo tapes arrived to replace the lost or damaged ones from the past. I already heard last week why my 4th TV programme hadn't been shown, the firm went broke before completing the series so totally down to them to fix it now it's been passed along. No more plans now, none. OK, two minutes on Monday to fill a prescription. Two visitors couldn't make it midweek, one being a relief as has now become a pest, so I've completed all my work virtually alone, as usual for the current period of time.

Of course timing is irrelevant in my career, if a project is completed when is not important. What is important is the current one is the biggest ever and my first newspaper job. Meanwhile after thinking I could catch up with last year's series of Grange Hill after I discovered there was one came to a halt on the second day when they stopped it as it was about suicide. Pathetic. No idea if they will show it now, or if before the new and final series in April.
I can't see ahead besides having to wait in for the cleaner tomorrow. More than that I cannot say. The week was fine really and I just hope the rewards are next. It's been a long time coming if it is.

Pugh, Pugh, Barney McGrew, Cuthbert, Dibble, Grubb

Yes, I've just found a Trumpton video, with my favourite songs and episodes. Felt just like the first time I saw them in 1967 again. You can't return to the 60s but you can bring it here.

On other business I've got a little further on one TV programme, turns out the company got into difficulties when filming and had to pass it along so still hasn't been completed. Nothing to do with the TV people but the producers. I guessed as much and very lucky they haven't dropped it as well. So really three projects on the go, this is taken care of, the other is done but I haven't seen it and the third is the big one should it come off. All I will say for now.

Little work jobs this week, more than usual. Slightly. One delivery came today when I wasn't there but I'm trying the redelivery service online for the first time. Worth a try. I expect it's my 3rd set of Status Quo tapes, having lost or melted the last two over about a 20 year period. Don't leave tapes in the car outside the glove box as they will melt in the sun. Money down the drain. I'm even going to bed a little earlier as I want to do a delivery before my first appointment if possible and can't get up late if I do. I have two more mail orders coming from abroad who knows when and only Uri Geller's more clairvoyant guide knows when anything else on the list will happen. Actually no one can see the future, and even when someone has planned a date they rarely bother to tell the others involved as I've discovered when my TV programmes have been shown before I knew about them. Or in one case put online without telling any of the participants. I was only mentioned in them but nonetheless the people in them would never have known had I not found them by accident.

Little else from day one of week whatever it is 2008, except two people said they'd be seeing me last month and being now this month did not happen. That's the one big problem with the internet, we meet loads of interesting people but almost impossible to meet them. So meanwhile I discover new cafes in parks in Golders Green and Hendon, take photos of stations in Willesden and even now tidy my house. I've lost more things than I've found or put away and doubt anyone pinched most, mainly as not many people come here. Well not ones I'd suspect anyway. Where the Parker pen went the night I had 5 of said people over is still unknown and none of them are like that but it's now vanished from the very room we were in and no answers yet. And my new trousers from my bedroom. Happened all my life really and some reappear years later.