In the last couple of days I've had not only more evidence of remote viewing, but stories from people I know (rather than from books) about seeing the future and being protected from disaster that hadn't yet happened. All this paints a picture of a world quite different from what it appears, the problem being the higher level only appears to most once in a blue moon against a background of banal normality.
We have choices, but given in order to learn which is the right one, and suffer the consequences to avoid us making them again, like enjoying yourself when studying for a degree. These are the self created problems, my only beef being the severity of consequences I would probably have changed without such loud messages. For instance suffering for months rather than hours from a poor decision doesn't teach you any more. You realised your mistake so extending the punishment is more earthly than heavenly. If you create a system (assuming a creator) why make the system tougher than it needs to be?
On the other sides, I still see what could be called piles of manure in the road ahead, and am either ploughing right through or round them when I can find a way. Until this week there was little pleasure to balance, but if my TV programme is on after all that is my good news. After today the only crap ahead is the tax inspection which was delayed for a few weeks and not by me. Crap that I know of anyway. I am realising my reluctance to go out is a physical thing as well, as recovering from chronic fatigue I am using the effort to go round a few shops it would have taken for a day at work. I am limited by my energy and that is low. My brain works perfectly though so I take it back home and create. Photo prints, essays, discussions, networking, all from here. I have visitors, do psychic research and meditate.
Typically Big Brother starts tonight and I have to go out so am recording it, I just hope it works as seeing the new arrivals is a unique programme and sets you up for the rest of the series. My priorities may be all fucked up but they work for me. Meanwhile I see other people running around going out to cinemas, meals and meetings and wonder how I ever managed them myself. I am now able to do limited activities for about an hour and then return home. Better than nothing for sure and it's a lesson not to feel inadequate as a couple of years ago (with the help of tablets I can no longer take) I was like that as well, though not like 20 years earlier. As so much going out is driven not by interest but boredom I see a virtue there, as I'm content nowadays at home, especially with friends or family. I may well have experienced more than the current people my age travelling the world as I crammed it all in to about the first 25 years. Making the lists I am still probably ahead on theatres cinemas and football matches as I used to blitz them when I was interested, and still do with the football health permitting. 4 games in 5 days I think is my record. Driving 50 miles on a Saturday to see a new ground and then drive home was actually good fun and I always bought a little souvenir from the club shops if open, and have a teddy from Southend, a ruler from Oxford, a car from Wycombe and had I not thrown it an empty paper cup from Reading. My version of tourism.
I think the delayed high from last year from the TV programme will carry me along for a while as at the time it was the only thing keeping me sane, was then removed so I had to survive unarmed, and have now got it back. Until you're enlightened you can only get most of your pleasure from outside, and that's how it's designed to work or we'd never bother to do anything. Once you've worn out these avenues (women excepted) you work on inner pleasure as I did in 1996. OK, I'm still waiting, but trying legal drugs which only ended me up in a & e were my only attempt to speed the process. Bad move, seen the error and never again. Many try and many fail that route, not worth the risk but I was desperate and totally uninformed. I suppose the fact LSD was unavailable at the time is one help as people can live with that for life after one trip. Soon after I was offered some and said I'd already tried that route and stopped. Good timing there at least, it may enlighten a few people, and drive the others insane.
Well, that's the news from NW9, it's a relief to have net access but hope the laptop is fixed so I can keep the quizzes up over the weekend. But I still have to look at the cheese and not the holes. Not always that easy. But nothing wrong with a good hole either.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
A trip round the supernatural.
Despite having sod all to report (rain and shit) I've been challenged to return, plus my laptop lost its internet connection so couldn't get on over the weekend.
So what can I say? There are a few shafts of light mainly the announcement my 3rd TV appearance appears on now, July 7th. Watch this space once I see it in writing on the schedule. That was really a relief. It's not only a third of my total speaking parts but on a channel with 10 times more viewers than the other two. I have also taken a pile of photos in Mill Hill, partly inspired by a request to add a pond photo I just took to their group, and realised there were many ponds in Mill Hill. So from running out of ideas I ended up with many new pictures besides the usual buses and a nice view of the M1 from the shopping centre.
Besides that and the rain and freezing weather (when it reached 4' last night my boiler went off) life is pretty routine. I am now more convinced in more psychic powers than I was, although that doesn't affect my immediate life. My grandma told a story of their friend's brother who went to a medium, and their mother said she had an argument with his wife, she pulled her hair and she kept it in a drawer. He went and looked and there it was. Now after a 16 year career as a researcher this hardly surprises me as all information can be tuned into, but is one of the clearest pieces of evidence if one message is good then however rare it is a reality. We can all do it, just some better than others and need practice like any other talent.
Now I just read a very sad philosophical description of existentialism, describing the universe as a cold hostile place and we're on our own here. Now this is surely the impression it gives, but the psychic messages we get contradict some of the view as we can't be alone. But all the information and help I get is neutral, doesn't improve life but just means we can see more. More of the same crap basically. God, love and all that isn't really evident as the true current behind everything. Even a few enlightened people I met say it's no better when they are aware of their true natures, just accurate. Many say it is better but I wonder what the deal is if some claim it to be just a different view of the same things.
I'm still scanning blogger to find other blogs but all I find are the editor's choices, none tagged or linked by interest. So all these labels we add here appear to be totally pointless so I just summarise mine with a few variations as my subjects rarely vary.
On a final note no internet allows me to meditate again, and that is the only positive route I know of. Had my move been in miles rather than millimetres since I started I'd be a very happy person by now. It works by moving us towards feeling pleasure and grows with use. Some eventually feel it constantly and have basically become enlightened, one of who I met who reached that level through a different method to mine. But they all work as others have as well as mine for me. But slow is the word and before I cut down I did it daily for well over 2 years but little happened except for the odd go. I know what it can do but rarely actually get there, and know if I don't do it I can't any other way. And it's not dependent on life outside or anything else, just a way to feel good which is something we can all do naturally as we are designed to. How nature designed us to not feel something unless a teacher tells us how is one of life's mysteries I can't start to understand, but am glad whoever discovered it did and then told me. After my qualifications that was the most important course I did, and the others are business, this was the best pleasure one. It was a weekly hour video for at least 5 months, but as the teacher didn't come here more than every year I had to wait about 15 as the first time I hadn't done my quota. Then a one or two evening selection process where they check you understood the course and then a weekend course (in Brighton Centre for us) to see him talk one day and teach the methods the next. Despite little sleep that was one of the proudest days of my life. For over a year knowledge, as it is called, was the most important thing in my life and now I'd sat in a big armchair and within 2 hours knew what it was. I've 'been there' for a few minutes or so a number of times, so will carry on doing it for life, and hope one day I break through like so many others to the higher levels. And it's not even practice, people often get there quickly but it may not last. Beyond me to fathom out, I just persist and hope.
So what can I say? There are a few shafts of light mainly the announcement my 3rd TV appearance appears on now, July 7th. Watch this space once I see it in writing on the schedule. That was really a relief. It's not only a third of my total speaking parts but on a channel with 10 times more viewers than the other two. I have also taken a pile of photos in Mill Hill, partly inspired by a request to add a pond photo I just took to their group, and realised there were many ponds in Mill Hill. So from running out of ideas I ended up with many new pictures besides the usual buses and a nice view of the M1 from the shopping centre.
Besides that and the rain and freezing weather (when it reached 4' last night my boiler went off) life is pretty routine. I am now more convinced in more psychic powers than I was, although that doesn't affect my immediate life. My grandma told a story of their friend's brother who went to a medium, and their mother said she had an argument with his wife, she pulled her hair and she kept it in a drawer. He went and looked and there it was. Now after a 16 year career as a researcher this hardly surprises me as all information can be tuned into, but is one of the clearest pieces of evidence if one message is good then however rare it is a reality. We can all do it, just some better than others and need practice like any other talent.
Now I just read a very sad philosophical description of existentialism, describing the universe as a cold hostile place and we're on our own here. Now this is surely the impression it gives, but the psychic messages we get contradict some of the view as we can't be alone. But all the information and help I get is neutral, doesn't improve life but just means we can see more. More of the same crap basically. God, love and all that isn't really evident as the true current behind everything. Even a few enlightened people I met say it's no better when they are aware of their true natures, just accurate. Many say it is better but I wonder what the deal is if some claim it to be just a different view of the same things.
I'm still scanning blogger to find other blogs but all I find are the editor's choices, none tagged or linked by interest. So all these labels we add here appear to be totally pointless so I just summarise mine with a few variations as my subjects rarely vary.
On a final note no internet allows me to meditate again, and that is the only positive route I know of. Had my move been in miles rather than millimetres since I started I'd be a very happy person by now. It works by moving us towards feeling pleasure and grows with use. Some eventually feel it constantly and have basically become enlightened, one of who I met who reached that level through a different method to mine. But they all work as others have as well as mine for me. But slow is the word and before I cut down I did it daily for well over 2 years but little happened except for the odd go. I know what it can do but rarely actually get there, and know if I don't do it I can't any other way. And it's not dependent on life outside or anything else, just a way to feel good which is something we can all do naturally as we are designed to. How nature designed us to not feel something unless a teacher tells us how is one of life's mysteries I can't start to understand, but am glad whoever discovered it did and then told me. After my qualifications that was the most important course I did, and the others are business, this was the best pleasure one. It was a weekly hour video for at least 5 months, but as the teacher didn't come here more than every year I had to wait about 15 as the first time I hadn't done my quota. Then a one or two evening selection process where they check you understood the course and then a weekend course (in Brighton Centre for us) to see him talk one day and teach the methods the next. Despite little sleep that was one of the proudest days of my life. For over a year knowledge, as it is called, was the most important thing in my life and now I'd sat in a big armchair and within 2 hours knew what it was. I've 'been there' for a few minutes or so a number of times, so will carry on doing it for life, and hope one day I break through like so many others to the higher levels. And it's not even practice, people often get there quickly but it may not last. Beyond me to fathom out, I just persist and hope.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Home truths
Besides the last news on not only synchronicity but for the first time someone appeared to be having a conversation with someone who is dead. This totally shakes every belief I have, and add to that the scientific proof people can apparently see the future plus these coincidences mean what we see as random free will is actually arranged from a higher level.
The trouble is the actual details of the life guided by these principles is mainly cack at the moment. I get bits and pieces of good in among a background of darkness. I have just been on the phone to a live example of transcending our suffering as he has a natural ability to overcome pain and related suffering by telling himself it isn't that bad. That could be taught to others and save the medical profession a lot of work. It's a rare ability and one that is a high yogic achievement and of course some people have these things naturally. I have my own but it doesn't include immunity to anything besides anger. Not having much anger means others can see life can be lived without it, and it really isn't a necessary emotion. No use to me really and if it comes it goes very quickly.
Today was almost wasted, I didn't sleep for ages so got up later than usual and besides cut the front lawn used the spare time to almost do nothing. There's a bit of time for more, I also saw the European Cup final on TV which was almost as exciting as the semi finals, and more than the FA cup final, and now I'm back here telling everyone just how little I did. Naturally doing nothing in a family is fun, it only sucks when you're on your own. I found many people who go out and away a lot are so bored at home they try and find excitement that way. I have in the past but agoraphobia aside am now at 47 perfectly content in an environment I spent years creating, and have done enough exploring to find whatever's out there isn't as clever as here. A representative sample of events, countries and other activities, and now my focus is on spiritual development and creation, all of which can be done right here.
As Maharaji says, people travel across the world to find enlightenment when the whole time it's always been within them. You can be right where you are and do the right thing, where you are is irrelevant and any problems always follow you across the universe, as when I found I had to resit half my first year exams when away, I still had to do it and couldn't escape the realities of life by being elsewhere. Better to fix your problems and not care about runnig around once you've checked it all out. I also had the chance to blitz every aspect of entertainment by 20, living in London when everything was very cheap. In the end I switched from the cinemas and theatres and discos to football and psychic events. And whatever my family think this was not where I met friends and partners, just learnt things. So my conclusion is once you're content where you are no one (girlfriends in particular) shouldn't condemn you for doing so, as how many people are actually happy in and around home? Not that many I suspect.
The trouble is the actual details of the life guided by these principles is mainly cack at the moment. I get bits and pieces of good in among a background of darkness. I have just been on the phone to a live example of transcending our suffering as he has a natural ability to overcome pain and related suffering by telling himself it isn't that bad. That could be taught to others and save the medical profession a lot of work. It's a rare ability and one that is a high yogic achievement and of course some people have these things naturally. I have my own but it doesn't include immunity to anything besides anger. Not having much anger means others can see life can be lived without it, and it really isn't a necessary emotion. No use to me really and if it comes it goes very quickly.
Today was almost wasted, I didn't sleep for ages so got up later than usual and besides cut the front lawn used the spare time to almost do nothing. There's a bit of time for more, I also saw the European Cup final on TV which was almost as exciting as the semi finals, and more than the FA cup final, and now I'm back here telling everyone just how little I did. Naturally doing nothing in a family is fun, it only sucks when you're on your own. I found many people who go out and away a lot are so bored at home they try and find excitement that way. I have in the past but agoraphobia aside am now at 47 perfectly content in an environment I spent years creating, and have done enough exploring to find whatever's out there isn't as clever as here. A representative sample of events, countries and other activities, and now my focus is on spiritual development and creation, all of which can be done right here.
As Maharaji says, people travel across the world to find enlightenment when the whole time it's always been within them. You can be right where you are and do the right thing, where you are is irrelevant and any problems always follow you across the universe, as when I found I had to resit half my first year exams when away, I still had to do it and couldn't escape the realities of life by being elsewhere. Better to fix your problems and not care about runnig around once you've checked it all out. I also had the chance to blitz every aspect of entertainment by 20, living in London when everything was very cheap. In the end I switched from the cinemas and theatres and discos to football and psychic events. And whatever my family think this was not where I met friends and partners, just learnt things. So my conclusion is once you're content where you are no one (girlfriends in particular) shouldn't condemn you for doing so, as how many people are actually happy in and around home? Not that many I suspect.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Supernatural events
I was about to carry on talking bollocks as that's all there was, but having just at last been caught up in a psychic web at least that was the first message for a very long time the system is still there despite whatever crap it's been turning up lately. OK, it wasn't all crap, I have a few nice female friends but with the ones I like no physical contact, extend back to around 1983 and you get the picture.
The psychic stuff is another level of the highest type of phenomena I've found, coincidence. My friend has been hiding since his divorce, and I decided it was time I phoned him after not speaking directly for over a year. He said 'you got my message' when I called. No, what message? After well over a year he just left a message asking me to call him back. And what about? He'd just wanted someone they knew to call his mother after losing touch a few years ago and the same day she did. Then I did in response to a call about the same thing happening, only it was a coincidence.
This is how life fits together, there seems a time for things to happen somehow, and even my poor health slowed me down but didn't stop me and made me test my friend's understanding when I was slow or incapable. That's little better after a good week as the ear problem returns like Ken Livingstone (our local curse of a politician) and I'm not quite sure which is easier to get rid of. The final element was he'd had a psychic reading where the first name and second initial of my stepfather came in and he was described exactly as he was with every detail correct, some which he didn't know until I confirmed it. These things freak new experiencers out, especially unbelievers, and although I expect clairvoyance now coincidences have just begun to feel normal to me as they are a part of what I consider normal life now.
Whether there's a point, lesson or good in them I have yet to see. I have survived every assault of germs and neighbours (don't ask) or I wouldn't be here now, but so much needs sorting out in my life which is either beyond my means to arrange or I've already done what I can and have to wait.
The week ahead (so far) is clear, same as the last one was really, and so far the same sort of plans as there's nothing better and my health can limit the scope as well. So I work my way round London NW11, finding more and more details, rather than look to places unknown just because I've done everywhere else. Or known and not worth taking. I was pleased I made something from such pearls as Willesden and Acton, but there's really nowhere clever left. Swiss Cottage possibly, but Kentish Town, Southgate, Barnet and all places beyond are as photogenic in the main as Cherie Blair but less intriguing. I just read a few comments about her somewhere else and if nothing else that face sure generates interest. All the money in the world can't change that... But we all have a cross to bear, including those who don't, who tend to imagine it. I've already described mine, which put me at the 'has to try extremely hard' level of life for good, until you get married anyhow.
Last week was almost free of earache for a change, so it had to come back yesterday, although as I said I don't stop living with these problems, just seem to do it differently. But who wants pain and dizziness? But whatever lessons I may need to learn and changes make they need a little less to generate them. Why suffer to be a better person anyway? Well, I still see around 10 people a day visiting here, so thank you for your persistence, I suspect I know who left the comment yesterday and they clearly have issues that are being transferred to me by projection. No idea what their problem is, but it certainly isn't shared by me. That site has kept me going for much of the last 7 years and the only pratt or wally is the person who sent me the rude message there, and whether or not it's the same person the one who left the comment. Why these guys who know you choose to go anonymous when they know me is cowardly and pathetic, and at least it means some people have worse problems than me, mentally I mean. My mental is quite good now, just the physical.
The psychic stuff is another level of the highest type of phenomena I've found, coincidence. My friend has been hiding since his divorce, and I decided it was time I phoned him after not speaking directly for over a year. He said 'you got my message' when I called. No, what message? After well over a year he just left a message asking me to call him back. And what about? He'd just wanted someone they knew to call his mother after losing touch a few years ago and the same day she did. Then I did in response to a call about the same thing happening, only it was a coincidence.
This is how life fits together, there seems a time for things to happen somehow, and even my poor health slowed me down but didn't stop me and made me test my friend's understanding when I was slow or incapable. That's little better after a good week as the ear problem returns like Ken Livingstone (our local curse of a politician) and I'm not quite sure which is easier to get rid of. The final element was he'd had a psychic reading where the first name and second initial of my stepfather came in and he was described exactly as he was with every detail correct, some which he didn't know until I confirmed it. These things freak new experiencers out, especially unbelievers, and although I expect clairvoyance now coincidences have just begun to feel normal to me as they are a part of what I consider normal life now.
Whether there's a point, lesson or good in them I have yet to see. I have survived every assault of germs and neighbours (don't ask) or I wouldn't be here now, but so much needs sorting out in my life which is either beyond my means to arrange or I've already done what I can and have to wait.
The week ahead (so far) is clear, same as the last one was really, and so far the same sort of plans as there's nothing better and my health can limit the scope as well. So I work my way round London NW11, finding more and more details, rather than look to places unknown just because I've done everywhere else. Or known and not worth taking. I was pleased I made something from such pearls as Willesden and Acton, but there's really nowhere clever left. Swiss Cottage possibly, but Kentish Town, Southgate, Barnet and all places beyond are as photogenic in the main as Cherie Blair but less intriguing. I just read a few comments about her somewhere else and if nothing else that face sure generates interest. All the money in the world can't change that... But we all have a cross to bear, including those who don't, who tend to imagine it. I've already described mine, which put me at the 'has to try extremely hard' level of life for good, until you get married anyhow.
Last week was almost free of earache for a change, so it had to come back yesterday, although as I said I don't stop living with these problems, just seem to do it differently. But who wants pain and dizziness? But whatever lessons I may need to learn and changes make they need a little less to generate them. Why suffer to be a better person anyway? Well, I still see around 10 people a day visiting here, so thank you for your persistence, I suspect I know who left the comment yesterday and they clearly have issues that are being transferred to me by projection. No idea what their problem is, but it certainly isn't shared by me. That site has kept me going for much of the last 7 years and the only pratt or wally is the person who sent me the rude message there, and whether or not it's the same person the one who left the comment. Why these guys who know you choose to go anonymous when they know me is cowardly and pathetic, and at least it means some people have worse problems than me, mentally I mean. My mental is quite good now, just the physical.
Friday, May 18, 2007
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Another day, little changes
I have found by airing all my weird ideas here (and elsewhere) regardless of alienating many and looking like a self obsessed weirdo at least I've got this stuff out of the way and without paying a penny to a therapist. And for all the people accused or accusing people being too deep it's like calling someone too intelligent. You can be too shallow almost to the point of horizontal, but too deep? No way.
I just discovered I ordered (after being a lot more selective than usual) 207 new photos to be printed just now. I have been out 3 0r 4 times a week this year though and made plenty of new views of places known and unknown. Rather than spread myself further afield to undistinguished areas I'm finding smaller and smaller details between the ones I already take. So as people plant new gardens I have different places to see, and did a bunch of road name signs today, not just the sign but the area around them so you can see where the road actually is. The best was an old cast iron double, one above another, saying where it led to. These little things are what life is really about, we all live somewhere but not everyone takes much notice of the details or cares.
Non events, Gordon Brown will be our next Prime Minister. Like changing the name of 1 to 1 to T Mobile. We won't notice the difference. Or if Cameron the twat gets in for the only opposition either. Get rid of grammar schools- by the tories? Fuck me, they'll be promoting immigration next, oh bugger, they are. Talk about between a rock and a hard place. Either way you look the same crazy totalitarian and anti-British policies. Let the EU take us over. Allow anyone in you like with no limits (I think it was 400,000 illegal immigrants just allowed to stay, if my memory was right), and I expect Cameron will finally top it all by agreeing with road charging. If we ever needed a revolution the time is now. General strike, stop paying council tax, using cars and buying petrol. They'll miss us when we stop performing. Petrol costs so much as people don't shop around. The shmock selling it for 97.9 round the corner from 94.9 has just as many people queuing up as the other. So they try and add another penny and it's gone up about 7 in the last month with no economic reasons.
If we were to stop buying it for a few days they'd be stuck.
This week has been reasonably average, the job planned for yesterday was cancelled for a while and I did a bit of work, then started tidying the spare room at last. Lots left to do though. One booking today then to NW11 for more photos as planned, then came back and uploaded them all as usual. And then back in a circle to the order, which takes quite a long time, although I chose them earlier which was half the job. Tomorrow is free all day, if dry probably gardening, and no plans for photos unless something comes to me. Maybe carry on the tidying and who knows. The gap today was I literally spoke to no one. Not even a shop. Besides a couple of irritating people on the phone I've been like someone in solitary. Not good for the soul and nothing you can ever do will replace having another person around. Not even the chatroom I went in with a few stupid kids pretending they were talking to non existent people for half an hour which they thought was really funny. That was the standard. The photos were quite nice, although I realised whether it's raining or not I really can't be bothered to wait for buses to arrive at bus stops to show people getting on and off. If one comes along I'll take it but it's really not worth the effort to do it deliberately.
Unless I'm inspired I could be on the computer all day tomorrow if it rains, although there's nothing I need to look at there either. So many choices...
I just discovered I ordered (after being a lot more selective than usual) 207 new photos to be printed just now. I have been out 3 0r 4 times a week this year though and made plenty of new views of places known and unknown. Rather than spread myself further afield to undistinguished areas I'm finding smaller and smaller details between the ones I already take. So as people plant new gardens I have different places to see, and did a bunch of road name signs today, not just the sign but the area around them so you can see where the road actually is. The best was an old cast iron double, one above another, saying where it led to. These little things are what life is really about, we all live somewhere but not everyone takes much notice of the details or cares.
Non events, Gordon Brown will be our next Prime Minister. Like changing the name of 1 to 1 to T Mobile. We won't notice the difference. Or if Cameron the twat gets in for the only opposition either. Get rid of grammar schools- by the tories? Fuck me, they'll be promoting immigration next, oh bugger, they are. Talk about between a rock and a hard place. Either way you look the same crazy totalitarian and anti-British policies. Let the EU take us over. Allow anyone in you like with no limits (I think it was 400,000 illegal immigrants just allowed to stay, if my memory was right), and I expect Cameron will finally top it all by agreeing with road charging. If we ever needed a revolution the time is now. General strike, stop paying council tax, using cars and buying petrol. They'll miss us when we stop performing. Petrol costs so much as people don't shop around. The shmock selling it for 97.9 round the corner from 94.9 has just as many people queuing up as the other. So they try and add another penny and it's gone up about 7 in the last month with no economic reasons.
If we were to stop buying it for a few days they'd be stuck.
This week has been reasonably average, the job planned for yesterday was cancelled for a while and I did a bit of work, then started tidying the spare room at last. Lots left to do though. One booking today then to NW11 for more photos as planned, then came back and uploaded them all as usual. And then back in a circle to the order, which takes quite a long time, although I chose them earlier which was half the job. Tomorrow is free all day, if dry probably gardening, and no plans for photos unless something comes to me. Maybe carry on the tidying and who knows. The gap today was I literally spoke to no one. Not even a shop. Besides a couple of irritating people on the phone I've been like someone in solitary. Not good for the soul and nothing you can ever do will replace having another person around. Not even the chatroom I went in with a few stupid kids pretending they were talking to non existent people for half an hour which they thought was really funny. That was the standard. The photos were quite nice, although I realised whether it's raining or not I really can't be bothered to wait for buses to arrive at bus stops to show people getting on and off. If one comes along I'll take it but it's really not worth the effort to do it deliberately.
Unless I'm inspired I could be on the computer all day tomorrow if it rains, although there's nothing I need to look at there either. So many choices...
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Who came first?
I always knew she reminded me of someone. Billie Piper b 1982 Tiddler the Riddler born 1986.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
I've been
Where do I start? Slowly things are beginning to be done and I'm still seeing pretty clear connections all around, in the form of bunches of similar events. It does make life more interesting and challenge every aspect of science which seems to limit our scope and ability to progress in life. I think all the news as such was in the last entry, and since then I've been back taking some very nice photos though I say it myself, road signs, gardens and a block of shops with a huge name on it. The number of details you notice when you go up every street in turn is quite fascinating. There's little point going to distant or foreign areas as I know most places beyond the existing scope and there are only a few worth visiting, and I will sooner or later. Swiss Cottage station is a real carsey from outside though a massive subway system underneath. I was asked to join 2 Harrow groups but besides the station it's not very photogenic, the Hill is the best part but well photographed already and not as good as where I went so far.
It's satisfying to have got so many crap jobs out of the way in one go, and shown I was up to it. One of our staff just went crazy at Funtrivia so a few cobwebs have been blown away as a result and the few of us left are having to pick up the pieces. It was someone I never really rated as well over the top, and by the look of it finally lost his pieces. The only drama via a computer and thousands of miles, but drama nonetheless. I'm back trawling blogs and have seen a few new visitors although no comments. If anyone actually knows how people on blogspot are meant to keep in touch now the links are gone please let me know as London is only a small fraction of my lost audience.
No major plans now, one female friend (no more yet but friend for sure) and there is a chance it will extend further. I also saw the woman I was busy with at the gym at last, and sorted out the little issue I had to sort out, and am confident she doesn't go online so can say I'm still in love with her. No reason ever not to be, she brightens the whole place up and whatever it is she's got I need more of it, wherever it comes from.
Knowing one of the three possibly best women I know is still interested in me after 32 years is no practical use unless her boyfriend disappears and then somehow I found a way to bridge the 60 mile space between us. She'd never live with a man again so that wouldn't be the solution. If it could happen. But knowing she wanted me (in theory) and is as good as it could get I know I must have whatever is needed to do it elsewhere. Not many like her about though. The one in the gym is not in my standard mould. Looks wise she is but is what you can only call working class, with standard associated lifestyle. Lovely woman and otherwise perfect but someone who probably expects all their problems to be solved in the pub wouldn't last very long with me. You know how you can divide people into those who want to ask questions and those who don't care about the answers. They can never mix and never change. She at least has some questions which opened a door between the class wall that may have previously totally blocked any dialogue between us, but I'd already been showing her how to do crosswords (reluctantly I have to say, she would rather have gone off and had a fag or something, had she smoked) but when it comes to her I could probably devote a separate blog to her as when I think of her I'm happier.
I never mind if anyone reads what I say as it's all fair and honest, and if she read this at least I wouldn't have to wish she knew how I felt every time I saw her. Having a wife who wanted to go to bingo, the Costa Brava and the disco every bloody weekend would force her into an affair as if she went it wouldn't be with me. It would be a real Pygmalion relationship, me the teacher and father figure and she would be mixing with her own friends and society while I looked on at a distance from my study. I hear Des O'Connor had a son at about 73 so I shouldn't feel too old at my time of life, but would still rather be seen as a father not grandfather.
I wanted a family and kids as soon as I was free at 24, I dreamed about it and babysat since 16, with many glowing reports from the kids. But not even close to my own results. Any and all of my mental and physical problems could get in the way but they don't stop anyone. Criminals, psychotics, all have no shortage of kids. It's not a requirement to have all your marbles or limbs. In fact this odd government prefer people without faculties apparently as they are favoured over others for adoption, lottery grants and laws so I'd be in good company. OK, my poor kids would have to admit their father didn't have a job but at least that's one form of diversity I do want to promote as having a job is no big deal either way. Paying the bills is a big deal, how you do isn't important if no one gets hurt. And if you wanted to blame anyone, blame the youknowwhats that didn't give me a job when I was prepared to work, not me for never finding one. The longer you're out of it the less likely you'll want to get back in. The aristocracy know that better than anyone. Only plebs actually have to work for a living according to them. Pretty impractical but no one really looks down on them for not working through reason of millions in the bank.
It's satisfying to have got so many crap jobs out of the way in one go, and shown I was up to it. One of our staff just went crazy at Funtrivia so a few cobwebs have been blown away as a result and the few of us left are having to pick up the pieces. It was someone I never really rated as well over the top, and by the look of it finally lost his pieces. The only drama via a computer and thousands of miles, but drama nonetheless. I'm back trawling blogs and have seen a few new visitors although no comments. If anyone actually knows how people on blogspot are meant to keep in touch now the links are gone please let me know as London is only a small fraction of my lost audience.
No major plans now, one female friend (no more yet but friend for sure) and there is a chance it will extend further. I also saw the woman I was busy with at the gym at last, and sorted out the little issue I had to sort out, and am confident she doesn't go online so can say I'm still in love with her. No reason ever not to be, she brightens the whole place up and whatever it is she's got I need more of it, wherever it comes from.
Knowing one of the three possibly best women I know is still interested in me after 32 years is no practical use unless her boyfriend disappears and then somehow I found a way to bridge the 60 mile space between us. She'd never live with a man again so that wouldn't be the solution. If it could happen. But knowing she wanted me (in theory) and is as good as it could get I know I must have whatever is needed to do it elsewhere. Not many like her about though. The one in the gym is not in my standard mould. Looks wise she is but is what you can only call working class, with standard associated lifestyle. Lovely woman and otherwise perfect but someone who probably expects all their problems to be solved in the pub wouldn't last very long with me. You know how you can divide people into those who want to ask questions and those who don't care about the answers. They can never mix and never change. She at least has some questions which opened a door between the class wall that may have previously totally blocked any dialogue between us, but I'd already been showing her how to do crosswords (reluctantly I have to say, she would rather have gone off and had a fag or something, had she smoked) but when it comes to her I could probably devote a separate blog to her as when I think of her I'm happier.
I never mind if anyone reads what I say as it's all fair and honest, and if she read this at least I wouldn't have to wish she knew how I felt every time I saw her. Having a wife who wanted to go to bingo, the Costa Brava and the disco every bloody weekend would force her into an affair as if she went it wouldn't be with me. It would be a real Pygmalion relationship, me the teacher and father figure and she would be mixing with her own friends and society while I looked on at a distance from my study. I hear Des O'Connor had a son at about 73 so I shouldn't feel too old at my time of life, but would still rather be seen as a father not grandfather.
I wanted a family and kids as soon as I was free at 24, I dreamed about it and babysat since 16, with many glowing reports from the kids. But not even close to my own results. Any and all of my mental and physical problems could get in the way but they don't stop anyone. Criminals, psychotics, all have no shortage of kids. It's not a requirement to have all your marbles or limbs. In fact this odd government prefer people without faculties apparently as they are favoured over others for adoption, lottery grants and laws so I'd be in good company. OK, my poor kids would have to admit their father didn't have a job but at least that's one form of diversity I do want to promote as having a job is no big deal either way. Paying the bills is a big deal, how you do isn't important if no one gets hurt. And if you wanted to blame anyone, blame the youknowwhats that didn't give me a job when I was prepared to work, not me for never finding one. The longer you're out of it the less likely you'll want to get back in. The aristocracy know that better than anyone. Only plebs actually have to work for a living according to them. Pretty impractical but no one really looks down on them for not working through reason of millions in the bank.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Poo poo, the train's coming...
Well, as part of my new quest to revive blogger (since they unlinked all the fucking members, the crazy arseholes) I've been using the only linked blog facility I know, London Bloggers. OK, it limits me to only locals, besides those clever clever wallies who think it's amusing to say they're in London while writing from the Phillipines as they once spent a week in Earls Court in 1989.
Anyway, one trip took me to Ealing Broadway where guess what, he was offering and requesting poo stories. As soon as the blog site emails me a password I'll add mine, just the best one, as no one wants to be reminded of 10 minutes in the back of a friend's car at about the age of 6 with the fullest pants it's possible to have in human terms. It was just too big to wait. Well now I've told you instead but it's the wiping circles on the wall story for him, the one that had the 6'4'' John Mitchell doubled up with laughter in the school corridor when told by mt friend Peter in about 1976. Those were the days. Except for the exams, not that I even minded them then. A bit of travel (as a private candidate I got sent all over London per O and A level) and competition, with the inevitable fail grades the following summer. What a foundation laid for my future.
OK, I resat the Os, having started a year early for fun, and passed next time, and just scraped 3 As rather than fail, followed by failing nearly every exam in my degree till I got a private tutor. All's well that ends well in exam land anyway. My biggest shock at 16 was discovering I'd stopped growing at the exact height all my friends were when they started. Despite a long string of girlfriends I believed for many years this would hold me back although the evidence all contradicted it. And of course I'm stuck at the size (and mind) of a 14 year old all my life now, and it is absolutely no advantage at all. Like having one leg. No silver lining wherever you look. We can't even go after midget girls either now as besides achondroplastic most are now fixed with growth hormone and half probably overtook me at about 13. I suppose if there were to be a silver lining I think unlike Steven, my neighbour with the personality of a snail (after being trodden on), who walked into a disco once and the girls literally queued to dance with, forced me to use my personality as guys like him pulled with no need for one. A mental Napoleon complex. Pushed my mind to its limits as because my body couldn't grow I had to use the only thing that could.
I still think I missed a few hundred extra women though but I only ever wanted one good one. Still waiting. Meanwhile, where it lets me, I'm commenting on blogs again hoping to revive this dying format, and if I add enough maybe someone will have a look in here. An 80% reduction of hits in a year is pretty drastic and luckily this isn't a business. Flickr is how this was a couple of years ago. Loads of comments and unlike blogger you can track your own comments for replies in a click, which is so fucking simple to do it makes you wonder if this whole site is created by a machine and has no actual human brain behind it. It can't log me in automatically despite checking the box and the post labels are of no use to anyone as I always write about the same few topics anyway. If we could search other blogs with it then it would work, but our own? What the hell use is that?
It's pissing with rain and I'm waiting to collect the car from its service. I had a couple of spare hours as a result and decided to listen to the radio programmes I record overnight. I was busy yesterday, took the car in, had a friend over and had computer problems which have now been bypassed rather than totally repaired. Then saw Chelsea and Man Utd shlep out a pointless 0-0 draw having decided the champion's position already. I've got all my jobs done work or not this week and the rest is a bonus. But good to see poo stories are alive and well. Going back to holidays as a teenager when sooner or later someone would tell a poo story and it would last all night as we remembered car journeys and school assemblies where noises and smells gave away the unavoidable evidence of an unplanned dump. Going behind sofas, in back gardens, finding soiled pants discarded in a room etc are universal except possibly in primitive socities where that is all they do anyway, like Saudi Arabia. I joke not, anyone spending time in Edgware Road around Paddington will know they go wherever they are, and squat indoors in any available corner. Or outdoors once they leave the hotel or Harrods. My friend lived there for a couple of years and besides take a photo or ask me along to look I trust his word for it. Better than their bombs I suppose but almost as unpleasant.
Yesterday they had a programme on TV for non P.C. humour, and basically concluded if you make one subject taboo then how do you pick which? All or nothing really, and jokes are far less harmful than direct insults. But Arabs crapping in hotel rooms sadly is not funny unless you see someone step in it.
I still don't know how many spastics it takes to screw in a lightbulb though. Probably because it's impossible...
Anyway, one trip took me to Ealing Broadway where guess what, he was offering and requesting poo stories. As soon as the blog site emails me a password I'll add mine, just the best one, as no one wants to be reminded of 10 minutes in the back of a friend's car at about the age of 6 with the fullest pants it's possible to have in human terms. It was just too big to wait. Well now I've told you instead but it's the wiping circles on the wall story for him, the one that had the 6'4'' John Mitchell doubled up with laughter in the school corridor when told by mt friend Peter in about 1976. Those were the days. Except for the exams, not that I even minded them then. A bit of travel (as a private candidate I got sent all over London per O and A level) and competition, with the inevitable fail grades the following summer. What a foundation laid for my future.
OK, I resat the Os, having started a year early for fun, and passed next time, and just scraped 3 As rather than fail, followed by failing nearly every exam in my degree till I got a private tutor. All's well that ends well in exam land anyway. My biggest shock at 16 was discovering I'd stopped growing at the exact height all my friends were when they started. Despite a long string of girlfriends I believed for many years this would hold me back although the evidence all contradicted it. And of course I'm stuck at the size (and mind) of a 14 year old all my life now, and it is absolutely no advantage at all. Like having one leg. No silver lining wherever you look. We can't even go after midget girls either now as besides achondroplastic most are now fixed with growth hormone and half probably overtook me at about 13. I suppose if there were to be a silver lining I think unlike Steven, my neighbour with the personality of a snail (after being trodden on), who walked into a disco once and the girls literally queued to dance with, forced me to use my personality as guys like him pulled with no need for one. A mental Napoleon complex. Pushed my mind to its limits as because my body couldn't grow I had to use the only thing that could.
I still think I missed a few hundred extra women though but I only ever wanted one good one. Still waiting. Meanwhile, where it lets me, I'm commenting on blogs again hoping to revive this dying format, and if I add enough maybe someone will have a look in here. An 80% reduction of hits in a year is pretty drastic and luckily this isn't a business. Flickr is how this was a couple of years ago. Loads of comments and unlike blogger you can track your own comments for replies in a click, which is so fucking simple to do it makes you wonder if this whole site is created by a machine and has no actual human brain behind it. It can't log me in automatically despite checking the box and the post labels are of no use to anyone as I always write about the same few topics anyway. If we could search other blogs with it then it would work, but our own? What the hell use is that?
It's pissing with rain and I'm waiting to collect the car from its service. I had a couple of spare hours as a result and decided to listen to the radio programmes I record overnight. I was busy yesterday, took the car in, had a friend over and had computer problems which have now been bypassed rather than totally repaired. Then saw Chelsea and Man Utd shlep out a pointless 0-0 draw having decided the champion's position already. I've got all my jobs done work or not this week and the rest is a bonus. But good to see poo stories are alive and well. Going back to holidays as a teenager when sooner or later someone would tell a poo story and it would last all night as we remembered car journeys and school assemblies where noises and smells gave away the unavoidable evidence of an unplanned dump. Going behind sofas, in back gardens, finding soiled pants discarded in a room etc are universal except possibly in primitive socities where that is all they do anyway, like Saudi Arabia. I joke not, anyone spending time in Edgware Road around Paddington will know they go wherever they are, and squat indoors in any available corner. Or outdoors once they leave the hotel or Harrods. My friend lived there for a couple of years and besides take a photo or ask me along to look I trust his word for it. Better than their bombs I suppose but almost as unpleasant.
Yesterday they had a programme on TV for non P.C. humour, and basically concluded if you make one subject taboo then how do you pick which? All or nothing really, and jokes are far less harmful than direct insults. But Arabs crapping in hotel rooms sadly is not funny unless you see someone step in it.
I still don't know how many spastics it takes to screw in a lightbulb though. Probably because it's impossible...
Monday, May 07, 2007
Nothing on TV but snooker
Being snookered (a very boring world final) by the TV I am back here. I am glad to see a few more visitors than recently, including one from Albania (they have computers?/electricity). I've done sweet FA anyhow since my last visit besides a bit of shopping (normally only reported by geriatrics and retards but little enough excitement can turn anyone into either) but I've played many more online quizzes and this was all that was left. The Funtrivia blogs were threatened with extinction, so typically everyone suddenly realised they needed them and started writing again and they're still there so far. We did get a little chat board instead but not quite as impressive.
The week ahead (my Monday allowance of predictions) seems fairly free, a couple of bookings and that's about it. I want to take pictures of a couple of stations tomorrow as I saw you can probably see them from bridges, and have chosen the next I want to print, and did end up with some nice ones last week after seeing little places in between the others I've taken. How long they will continue to turn up is anyone's guess, but I have now gone out taking them with someone else at last. And female. I certainly appreciate everything I do now as there have been days when I couldn't do any of them for health reasons and now I know it all counts, no job is small, it's only whether you can do it or not that day, like lifting weights. What may be easy to one is impossible to another but may be later on and vice versa. I still have my share of worries, some old, some new and some may be over but can't know for certain. But when I saw the stats today I thought how disappointing it can be to visit a blog and find nothing new. I found 3 of my links are gone now so time to delete but nothing to replace them with. I was looking up an answer for Funtrivia which made me look for this scene from Reginald Perrin, one of my all time favourites.
Adam: I done biggies! (The car screeches to a halt).
Elizabeth: That is not the right way to say it, Adam. It's "I've done biggies".
Linda: Let them talk the way they want to, Mum.
Elizabeth: Well, they should be able to speak correctly. They might want jobs with the BBC one day.
Reggie: Yes, and all the BBC newsreaders say "I've done biggies".
Tom: It's just that we like our own way of bringing them up. We treat them, not as children, but as tiny adults.
The complete scripts are on www.Leonardrossiter.com I also found a load of Fawlty Towers quotes which also sent me back to around 1978. They don't seem to manage such quality any more, possibly Seinfeld but that's long gone as well. I watch a lot less TV now, partly as it's crap and partly as I have broadband. My favourite programmes are on digital which are all from the 60s like Randall and Hopkirk deceased, which I forgot to record today. The Avengers (Thursday) The Saint and all the rest of the similar bunch all show Britain as I remembered it, Morris cars (who sees them any more, not just age but abysmal quality) Routemaster buses, hippy posters, old phones with named exchanges (CUNningham 5797), the adverts you no longer see like the lemon on the grocery door 'I drink Idris when I's dry', Watney's Red Barrel and all the other products long forgotten, although Idris now appears only to supply pubs. These are the things I notice besides the action in life and TV. The setting. And art and design is influenced by atmosphere, and that must mean 2007 is poisonous if you look at the new houses and cars, let alone the TV ads, which appear to be written by and for drug addicts. Totally random and meaningless except to the writer themself. It's a diseased attitude throughout this century, begun with Thatcher's grey emasculation of anything left of the 60s culture, followed by Labour's mirror image 'style over content' government (named by Ben Elton, formerly a fan) which saw Britain become a multicultural overcrowded version of the worst suburbs of Paris. But without the cheap and frequent public transport. Anyone in London can't avoid moaning nowadays unless living in the parts that cost over a million, as the places and people have switched to the third world. Flats replace houses, people double in density due to loss of restrictions on immigration and as a result building densities. No room to move on roads pavements or in any public building. It can't just be Brent and Barnet changing like this, I assume every borough has their share of it and in 50 years the tower blocks will have returned and English will be a minority language. Not racist, just descriptive of how it's starting to change. And if people can't speak the language (I include people who have been here many years, not just recent arrivals) how on earth are they expected to mix with the people who do? They simply don't need to. They have their own communities and clearly manage to get everything they need within them. I mean kids who start school at 5 and have to be taught English, if they're lucky. At least they just had a TV programme about it though it left the viewers with no opinion or conclusion, just the facts. Not that it's hard to make one from them.
Isolation, division, overcrowding and competiton for resources are always signs of a declining society and economy. Add the highest prices for housing and transport (public and private) and anywhere else would have had a war or revolution. We have the Daily Mail which just moans about it and states the bleedin' obvious. Then they vote the idiot Blair and antichrist Livingstone in again to make the damage even worse. OK, David Cameron was chosen to do a Blair to win an election, so we'll get the same either way. Great. More lies about global warming and punitive taxes that hit the poor more as a result. If I say it often enough people may begin to wake up as if you miss the picture it's still there. You've just had it hidden by smoke and mirrors. I try and blow it all away, someone has to do it.
The week ahead (my Monday allowance of predictions) seems fairly free, a couple of bookings and that's about it. I want to take pictures of a couple of stations tomorrow as I saw you can probably see them from bridges, and have chosen the next I want to print, and did end up with some nice ones last week after seeing little places in between the others I've taken. How long they will continue to turn up is anyone's guess, but I have now gone out taking them with someone else at last. And female. I certainly appreciate everything I do now as there have been days when I couldn't do any of them for health reasons and now I know it all counts, no job is small, it's only whether you can do it or not that day, like lifting weights. What may be easy to one is impossible to another but may be later on and vice versa. I still have my share of worries, some old, some new and some may be over but can't know for certain. But when I saw the stats today I thought how disappointing it can be to visit a blog and find nothing new. I found 3 of my links are gone now so time to delete but nothing to replace them with. I was looking up an answer for Funtrivia which made me look for this scene from Reginald Perrin, one of my all time favourites.
Adam: I done biggies! (The car screeches to a halt).
Elizabeth: That is not the right way to say it, Adam. It's "I've done biggies".
Linda: Let them talk the way they want to, Mum.
Elizabeth: Well, they should be able to speak correctly. They might want jobs with the BBC one day.
Reggie: Yes, and all the BBC newsreaders say "I've done biggies".
Tom: It's just that we like our own way of bringing them up. We treat them, not as children, but as tiny adults.
The complete scripts are on www.Leonardrossiter.com I also found a load of Fawlty Towers quotes which also sent me back to around 1978. They don't seem to manage such quality any more, possibly Seinfeld but that's long gone as well. I watch a lot less TV now, partly as it's crap and partly as I have broadband. My favourite programmes are on digital which are all from the 60s like Randall and Hopkirk deceased, which I forgot to record today. The Avengers (Thursday) The Saint and all the rest of the similar bunch all show Britain as I remembered it, Morris cars (who sees them any more, not just age but abysmal quality) Routemaster buses, hippy posters, old phones with named exchanges (CUNningham 5797), the adverts you no longer see like the lemon on the grocery door 'I drink Idris when I's dry', Watney's Red Barrel and all the other products long forgotten, although Idris now appears only to supply pubs. These are the things I notice besides the action in life and TV. The setting. And art and design is influenced by atmosphere, and that must mean 2007 is poisonous if you look at the new houses and cars, let alone the TV ads, which appear to be written by and for drug addicts. Totally random and meaningless except to the writer themself. It's a diseased attitude throughout this century, begun with Thatcher's grey emasculation of anything left of the 60s culture, followed by Labour's mirror image 'style over content' government (named by Ben Elton, formerly a fan) which saw Britain become a multicultural overcrowded version of the worst suburbs of Paris. But without the cheap and frequent public transport. Anyone in London can't avoid moaning nowadays unless living in the parts that cost over a million, as the places and people have switched to the third world. Flats replace houses, people double in density due to loss of restrictions on immigration and as a result building densities. No room to move on roads pavements or in any public building. It can't just be Brent and Barnet changing like this, I assume every borough has their share of it and in 50 years the tower blocks will have returned and English will be a minority language. Not racist, just descriptive of how it's starting to change. And if people can't speak the language (I include people who have been here many years, not just recent arrivals) how on earth are they expected to mix with the people who do? They simply don't need to. They have their own communities and clearly manage to get everything they need within them. I mean kids who start school at 5 and have to be taught English, if they're lucky. At least they just had a TV programme about it though it left the viewers with no opinion or conclusion, just the facts. Not that it's hard to make one from them.
Isolation, division, overcrowding and competiton for resources are always signs of a declining society and economy. Add the highest prices for housing and transport (public and private) and anywhere else would have had a war or revolution. We have the Daily Mail which just moans about it and states the bleedin' obvious. Then they vote the idiot Blair and antichrist Livingstone in again to make the damage even worse. OK, David Cameron was chosen to do a Blair to win an election, so we'll get the same either way. Great. More lies about global warming and punitive taxes that hit the poor more as a result. If I say it often enough people may begin to wake up as if you miss the picture it's still there. You've just had it hidden by smoke and mirrors. I try and blow it all away, someone has to do it.
Saturday, May 05, 2007
Busier than usual
I see the last post appears quite old but I'm sure I added one since. Never mind, they don't get lost here unlike flickr which sends many photos to oblivion and needs checking from time to time. Another week with two dates with two women, it often seems to happen that way though still only friends, ditto on that as well sadly. I need the patience of a saint whether I have it or not. Even my 2 local buses weren't as slow as these seem to take.
I had another major batch of accounts I just completed today, I assume they are OK. Took two decent lots of photos in between, not new areas as they are all done, but the gaps between the old places, and there seem to be many. I'd so much want to do a TV tour of London NW11 and if I ever get friendly with a producer will push the idea. And I wouldn't have to work far away or indoors either. Perfect job. These films have been made before and were fairly popular so is a possibility. And if allowed I'd be the only one to sneak in toilet jokes as well somehow. Or in the case of NW11 lack of toilets. One in the station and that's the lot. Temple Fortune never had any and the Suburb lost the NW11 one with the N2 one recently reopened. So in that area it's not just the bears that shit in the woods, trust me.
So a bit of business and pleasure this week for a change, and saw a few people, and female. You could almost say my life was becoming what boring people call normal. Of course if you enjoy life and don't hurt anyone that's normal, but not for conventional people. The hippies were the best hope to change all that but that died in the 70s and Victorian values seem to rule again. I think I'll ask blogger why we can't link profiles any more, upgrades are meant to be better but we have lost the most important tool for publicity. I literally have no way of finding any but the few blogs they link from the front page. There is London bloggers but that has been hacked by criminals and is now all ads for viagra, or viA^G*rA as they choose to spell it. Any webmaster can delete nonsense but I think the clever guys can block their spam from being deleted and the whole sites end up folding as did my one on enlightenment. Well, one day I'll be famous. People take the piss when you say that but there's no time limit and I think anyone with ambition can do it, as Max Clifford agrees. I am on step two now and just have to be patient. No sign of the web TV gig yet but they won't waste all that effort. My second subject already has a DVD of some so they have it ready to show. That's the news from Kingsbury for this week and anything else is better left out.
I had another major batch of accounts I just completed today, I assume they are OK. Took two decent lots of photos in between, not new areas as they are all done, but the gaps between the old places, and there seem to be many. I'd so much want to do a TV tour of London NW11 and if I ever get friendly with a producer will push the idea. And I wouldn't have to work far away or indoors either. Perfect job. These films have been made before and were fairly popular so is a possibility. And if allowed I'd be the only one to sneak in toilet jokes as well somehow. Or in the case of NW11 lack of toilets. One in the station and that's the lot. Temple Fortune never had any and the Suburb lost the NW11 one with the N2 one recently reopened. So in that area it's not just the bears that shit in the woods, trust me.
So a bit of business and pleasure this week for a change, and saw a few people, and female. You could almost say my life was becoming what boring people call normal. Of course if you enjoy life and don't hurt anyone that's normal, but not for conventional people. The hippies were the best hope to change all that but that died in the 70s and Victorian values seem to rule again. I think I'll ask blogger why we can't link profiles any more, upgrades are meant to be better but we have lost the most important tool for publicity. I literally have no way of finding any but the few blogs they link from the front page. There is London bloggers but that has been hacked by criminals and is now all ads for viagra, or viA^G*rA as they choose to spell it. Any webmaster can delete nonsense but I think the clever guys can block their spam from being deleted and the whole sites end up folding as did my one on enlightenment. Well, one day I'll be famous. People take the piss when you say that but there's no time limit and I think anyone with ambition can do it, as Max Clifford agrees. I am on step two now and just have to be patient. No sign of the web TV gig yet but they won't waste all that effort. My second subject already has a DVD of some so they have it ready to show. That's the news from Kingsbury for this week and anything else is better left out.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Quiet as the grave
Warning, potentially depressing entry ahead:
OK, if you've got this far at least you've been prepared. I'll start on a high note, did you know the most I get to meeting people socially is after funerals nowadays? I'm not even making it up. I go to the gym as well but as I actually know most people at the funerals I have a reason to converse. Certain members are local to me but do you think they keep in touch the rest of the time? Clearly not.
Otherwise it's become so quiet I sat down and analysed what had happened. It's either deadly dull or stress at the moment, and nothing better. Having returned from photographing disused rail bridges and posting the results on the internet has been the high since appearing on TV (500 UK viewers, firm now closed) a few months ago. Having intermittent earache hasn't helped me do much as it can also make me very tired and limit the ambition to go and do any more than the minimum possible. So what with trips on my bike to the local shops and photos of trees I fit this excitement into little bunches of work and seeing family and a few really incredibly draining people as my actual friends have all managed to leave gracefully.
I reckon if one person old or new arrived to share even parts of my life as an asset and not a demanding boring liability that would be the best key to improvement. And there are so many people out there, but all busy with their own lives. People get married, they get divorced and get married again within a year, I'm approaching 50 and never even been engaged besides a few days 200 miles from the person who then changed their mind. That was a blessing as she asked me and is a real liability but I was desperate. We tried it for a couple of weeks and I know what I was missing now. I admit in that time I did more than I had for ages but on about 5 hours sleep a night (not sex, she woke me up early) and constant shopping that was it. The highs were a day in Belgium and a trip (alone) to the Capital Radio roadshow which happened to be on the way home from taking her to work. And we were all given the prizes as not enough people turned up to compete for them! Yes, those were the days. I was just unemployed at the time and assuming within a year I'd be working again. Shows how you can't see anything ahead.
Now despite doing all I can to keep out of trouble when there's nothing bad there's still nothing good. I have an early (for me) appointment tomorrow and stupid aggravating arrangements following, I hope will be better than assumed. Sometimes you can't say no however much you want to. I ought to get them to come round and sort the accounts fgor me, that'll put her off ever bothering with me again. Actually it may even work...
Interestingly I just saw a programme following the lives of 3 short men, 2 the same height as me. It took me many years to realise I wasn't inferior and was just one more thing I had to deal with after being landed an only child which was probably equally destructive to a person. They both last a lifetime, like missing a leg or two, and unless married once your parents die you're on your own. And whatever age you are, you'll always look 14 to everyone else as well. Good formula. Admittedly my brains seem to be taller than most but it isn't quite as instantly obvious. And some won't believe it anyway. Getting told you think too deeply just means you are boring people who can't follow what you're saying and don't care as long as their alcohol supply is available. They may as well close down every philosophy and psychology department in the world as well while they're at it as they're clearly no value to them or in their opinions anyone else.
So maybe the week ahead could be better. I can't tell until it happens. Until recently I had what I called 'The system' where all the good things that may happen ahead were listed. That ended after my last TV appearance and is now empty. OK, only a few things on it ever did happen, most good things can't be seen coming and were not expected in advance, but it added a little hope. My current system is finishing the list of crap arrangements this week. Not a positive but a negative, which is never a good thing. And believe me, it helps to write it all here as if not I'd have to dump it on someone I know and lose another friend or relative as a result. I learnt that many years ago. And oddly the second best woman I probably met (brutal but accurate) still thinks the sun shines via my rectum but besides being in the woods so deep it would take Ranulf Fiennes a few days to get there she's got someone else already. So even though there is one woman alive suitable who thinks I am as well, but am only in with a chance if said man dies suddenly, which a) won't happen and b) is not the way to gain success. Just knowing the right woman is out there who feels the same about me is not just not good enough, but a fucking insult in many ways. Not by her but by life. Like having a meal in the fridge which is locked. No fucking use really is it? Except to my self esteem which still can't find another person 33 years later who feels the same way and isn't carrying a certificate of insanity. So it may tell me I can get the pick of the crop in theory but that's the same as the cheese shop in Monty Pythoin. It really doesn't matter how good the cheese is if it's not in stock is it?
Trust me, few people in my position could feel any different, it must be impossible. The earache that comes and goes doesn't help my attitude either of course...
OK, if you've got this far at least you've been prepared. I'll start on a high note, did you know the most I get to meeting people socially is after funerals nowadays? I'm not even making it up. I go to the gym as well but as I actually know most people at the funerals I have a reason to converse. Certain members are local to me but do you think they keep in touch the rest of the time? Clearly not.
Otherwise it's become so quiet I sat down and analysed what had happened. It's either deadly dull or stress at the moment, and nothing better. Having returned from photographing disused rail bridges and posting the results on the internet has been the high since appearing on TV (500 UK viewers, firm now closed) a few months ago. Having intermittent earache hasn't helped me do much as it can also make me very tired and limit the ambition to go and do any more than the minimum possible. So what with trips on my bike to the local shops and photos of trees I fit this excitement into little bunches of work and seeing family and a few really incredibly draining people as my actual friends have all managed to leave gracefully.
I reckon if one person old or new arrived to share even parts of my life as an asset and not a demanding boring liability that would be the best key to improvement. And there are so many people out there, but all busy with their own lives. People get married, they get divorced and get married again within a year, I'm approaching 50 and never even been engaged besides a few days 200 miles from the person who then changed their mind. That was a blessing as she asked me and is a real liability but I was desperate. We tried it for a couple of weeks and I know what I was missing now. I admit in that time I did more than I had for ages but on about 5 hours sleep a night (not sex, she woke me up early) and constant shopping that was it. The highs were a day in Belgium and a trip (alone) to the Capital Radio roadshow which happened to be on the way home from taking her to work. And we were all given the prizes as not enough people turned up to compete for them! Yes, those were the days. I was just unemployed at the time and assuming within a year I'd be working again. Shows how you can't see anything ahead.
Now despite doing all I can to keep out of trouble when there's nothing bad there's still nothing good. I have an early (for me) appointment tomorrow and stupid aggravating arrangements following, I hope will be better than assumed. Sometimes you can't say no however much you want to. I ought to get them to come round and sort the accounts fgor me, that'll put her off ever bothering with me again. Actually it may even work...
Interestingly I just saw a programme following the lives of 3 short men, 2 the same height as me. It took me many years to realise I wasn't inferior and was just one more thing I had to deal with after being landed an only child which was probably equally destructive to a person. They both last a lifetime, like missing a leg or two, and unless married once your parents die you're on your own. And whatever age you are, you'll always look 14 to everyone else as well. Good formula. Admittedly my brains seem to be taller than most but it isn't quite as instantly obvious. And some won't believe it anyway. Getting told you think too deeply just means you are boring people who can't follow what you're saying and don't care as long as their alcohol supply is available. They may as well close down every philosophy and psychology department in the world as well while they're at it as they're clearly no value to them or in their opinions anyone else.
So maybe the week ahead could be better. I can't tell until it happens. Until recently I had what I called 'The system' where all the good things that may happen ahead were listed. That ended after my last TV appearance and is now empty. OK, only a few things on it ever did happen, most good things can't be seen coming and were not expected in advance, but it added a little hope. My current system is finishing the list of crap arrangements this week. Not a positive but a negative, which is never a good thing. And believe me, it helps to write it all here as if not I'd have to dump it on someone I know and lose another friend or relative as a result. I learnt that many years ago. And oddly the second best woman I probably met (brutal but accurate) still thinks the sun shines via my rectum but besides being in the woods so deep it would take Ranulf Fiennes a few days to get there she's got someone else already. So even though there is one woman alive suitable who thinks I am as well, but am only in with a chance if said man dies suddenly, which a) won't happen and b) is not the way to gain success. Just knowing the right woman is out there who feels the same about me is not just not good enough, but a fucking insult in many ways. Not by her but by life. Like having a meal in the fridge which is locked. No fucking use really is it? Except to my self esteem which still can't find another person 33 years later who feels the same way and isn't carrying a certificate of insanity. So it may tell me I can get the pick of the crop in theory but that's the same as the cheese shop in Monty Pythoin. It really doesn't matter how good the cheese is if it's not in stock is it?
Trust me, few people in my position could feel any different, it must be impossible. The earache that comes and goes doesn't help my attitude either of course...
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Saturday's ramblings
Back again. The tail end of my photos, and at least the work waited till I hadn't any left to take. I took a few gardens and that was more or less it, but the work was clearly more important. Other than that I've had nothing new I can think of, but had to come here for a reason that's not clear yet. I am still waiting to see a woman at the gym about the little issue I mentioned earlier, it could take days or weeks, I never know. My only real project is my photo albums, and I've had no time to promote them yet. I have a new radio quiz since last week so have been phoning that a couple of times, and asked someone I know to call in tonight with the answer to my question as he was the one who gave it to me. I hope he does.
Besides a few standard appointments and pointless social arrangements I have no real plans ahead either, and to cover that and the lack of new photos it's time to clear out the house next. No trouble doing that, and if I get far enough will get a van to remove all the junk at the end of it. I also have the regular accounts to do but that's hardly worth mentioning. Although the last month or so has been fairly reasonable it hasn't gone above the level of average, now in my case that's a great improvement, but I know the highs I'm missing, and these are not up to me to create. They come at random and like anything else seem to be in phases implying the law of attraction does work. Having finally found a discussion on it, with many doubts and criticisms, it just means that if it works we do it all the time anyway, and may as well be in control than let it unfold like a sewage flow. Nothing immoral in that. We can be immoral with or without extra power and it's no different to who we are now if we are given that power, just part of human evolution.
Meanwhile it's been the hottest April on record, equals global warming. Except every time we have warm weather it's global warming, every time it's cold it's an isolated event. Many inches of isolated events fell on the USA last month and no one seems to have mentioned the heavy snow there which easily wipes out any sun in England over the same period. Every pro global warming policy is financial and designed to restrict everyone's lives and freedom. Just the same as anti terrorism laws. David Icke got it right and the few of us who can see through it all need to do only that and convert the sheep one by one. We can't do it any other way. To the people who do see through it it's as obvious as it is to me, but the rest believe the propoganda as if it makes sense, which none of it does. I have assembled all the possible data I can, as did the recent TV programme, that will have to stand on its own and hope one by one people see the sense and rebel against the powers trying to rob us in the name of saving a planet in absolutely no danger. CO2, especially in the tiny quantities we produce (less than 1% of the total) is reabsorbed by nature, the sea and trees. Always has, always will. Self regulating. Do you know how much more CO2 a major volcano emits than humanity? A hell of a lot more. All we need to know. Carbon emissions are irrelevant and rising temperatures are 50% of every day on earth, the other 50% being falling. Up, down and up again, for eternity.
And they think by not driving our cars on a Tuesday the world will be saved. From what? I have to repeat the same message over and over again, one by one people get the point. Meanwhile 800,000 people are due to be added to London in the next few years (10%). That is official, from the mayor. That is the real problem facing the world, global overpopulation. The resources will go a lot further if the population did not increase, rising temperatures as predicted can only help by saving energy usage. Simple childish logic.
Besides a few standard appointments and pointless social arrangements I have no real plans ahead either, and to cover that and the lack of new photos it's time to clear out the house next. No trouble doing that, and if I get far enough will get a van to remove all the junk at the end of it. I also have the regular accounts to do but that's hardly worth mentioning. Although the last month or so has been fairly reasonable it hasn't gone above the level of average, now in my case that's a great improvement, but I know the highs I'm missing, and these are not up to me to create. They come at random and like anything else seem to be in phases implying the law of attraction does work. Having finally found a discussion on it, with many doubts and criticisms, it just means that if it works we do it all the time anyway, and may as well be in control than let it unfold like a sewage flow. Nothing immoral in that. We can be immoral with or without extra power and it's no different to who we are now if we are given that power, just part of human evolution.
Meanwhile it's been the hottest April on record, equals global warming. Except every time we have warm weather it's global warming, every time it's cold it's an isolated event. Many inches of isolated events fell on the USA last month and no one seems to have mentioned the heavy snow there which easily wipes out any sun in England over the same period. Every pro global warming policy is financial and designed to restrict everyone's lives and freedom. Just the same as anti terrorism laws. David Icke got it right and the few of us who can see through it all need to do only that and convert the sheep one by one. We can't do it any other way. To the people who do see through it it's as obvious as it is to me, but the rest believe the propoganda as if it makes sense, which none of it does. I have assembled all the possible data I can, as did the recent TV programme, that will have to stand on its own and hope one by one people see the sense and rebel against the powers trying to rob us in the name of saving a planet in absolutely no danger. CO2, especially in the tiny quantities we produce (less than 1% of the total) is reabsorbed by nature, the sea and trees. Always has, always will. Self regulating. Do you know how much more CO2 a major volcano emits than humanity? A hell of a lot more. All we need to know. Carbon emissions are irrelevant and rising temperatures are 50% of every day on earth, the other 50% being falling. Up, down and up again, for eternity.
And they think by not driving our cars on a Tuesday the world will be saved. From what? I have to repeat the same message over and over again, one by one people get the point. Meanwhile 800,000 people are due to be added to London in the next few years (10%). That is official, from the mayor. That is the real problem facing the world, global overpopulation. The resources will go a lot further if the population did not increase, rising temperatures as predicted can only help by saving energy usage. Simple childish logic.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Am I wasting my life?
Here I am again, things are what I would call typical, although besides being on another treatment for earache which has improved today, I actually have few obligations lined up at the moment. That I know of anyway. Tomorrow is my day off, although there are accounts to do here at my leisure, ie when I have the time, so once I've been out if it's dry will probably get on with sorting all the receipts for over a year for a random inspection. Again. I know why they do it but can really do without the work even though I get paid for it it's boring and not worth the few pounds I get.
Looking back there's literally nothing worth reporting besides a few photos of nice gardens on my block (this estate actually has proper blocks like America) and was working much of the afternoon on said accounts mainly. The annual lot seem virtually sorted out after explaining our program to the accountant who agreed they have labelled everything with the wrong headings. Not an accounting convention, just a bunch of wank, as they say in Kingsbury.
Last night they were talking about coincidences on the radio so I called in and asked if anyone had seen The Secret, not a squeak. Then the next presenter came on and said he'd planned to talk about coincidences as well before the other one did. And no one called him either. But they are real. I know that much. But sooner or later out of the millions I can't be the only person who wants to investigate it further. I am looking for even one discussion forum on it, and the few I started have screamed to a halt. Such an alleged big deal should have a little more reaction and interest than it has, besides fucking enormous sales and profit figures for the participants. Is that really all it is about, as the critics say? This is the best all or nothing example I have seen, and fairly easily testable compared to most.
Otherwise each day passes with more or less activity, amazingly despite intermittent health problems I've got my chores done, they were just a lot harder than they would have been. Just like my 97 year old grandma, although I now do a lot less, every little job can feel like an achievement. But looking back the main thing I see is they were done. I hadn't taken my albums anywhere else yet but no rush for that, and the pictures I've taken are adding to the next one anyway. In a way besides knowing where to look I've gone to the trouble of driving around for ages taking them, although if you were given a map you could probably polish most of them off in a week. And spend a packet on a good camera as well. I've technically finished my list now, and am finally looking around gardens just in case I see any more nice ones like today. But I've done every decent road within 5 miles of Kingsbury and although I can go to Bushey eventually it isn't that great really. Plus half my relatives are there after they died. It has two associations for me, years of horse riding and the cemetery. We used to go shopping there as well and bought a car in the big Honda garage as well. The health food shop owner also gave me piano lessons for a while. When in doubt trawl past memories.
Beyond that lies Hatch End which has a few possibilities, and used to be one of my shops of choice when I lived near there as it was quiet and easy to park. Pinner has already had all the best photos done on film as we had a friend there years ago. The Northwood and Ruislip which really aren't that photogenic and not worth the trip. In all other directions are run down dumps, Kilburn, Hornsey, and the other way miles of faceless suburbs like Southgate and Palmers Green which are like the dark side in comparison to where I usually go. One day when I get a contact in TV I'll get a documentary walking the London suburbs making my usual comments on how many testicles would buy a house in Hampstead Garden Suburb or how many gangsters live in a street in Stanmore. You can also tell the areas to avoid by the taxi quotient or TQ. When I lived in Canons Park it was about 1 in 10, second only to Ilford and besides one friend who is far from typical all the ones who call the radio are total stereotypes, frustrated professors and politicians. OK, it takes a mechanical memory to pass the knowledge but it's the easiest actual job on earth once you pass, high fares and hours by choice. What could be better? I refused to take my law finals as I knew what the job involved and didn't see the point in qualifying to do a job I couldn't stand. I tried a few other courses and ended up with one not recognised by the state so basically bloody useless. Very helpful to the clients but not one to make a living in.
Besides taxi driving writing articles from home is another well paid holiday, and if I can screw the right person I may one day become published. Actually if I could screw anyone it would be quite nice. Especially if female, and human. Any considered. Time is running out and I can't be too choosy...
Looking back there's literally nothing worth reporting besides a few photos of nice gardens on my block (this estate actually has proper blocks like America) and was working much of the afternoon on said accounts mainly. The annual lot seem virtually sorted out after explaining our program to the accountant who agreed they have labelled everything with the wrong headings. Not an accounting convention, just a bunch of wank, as they say in Kingsbury.
Last night they were talking about coincidences on the radio so I called in and asked if anyone had seen The Secret, not a squeak. Then the next presenter came on and said he'd planned to talk about coincidences as well before the other one did. And no one called him either. But they are real. I know that much. But sooner or later out of the millions I can't be the only person who wants to investigate it further. I am looking for even one discussion forum on it, and the few I started have screamed to a halt. Such an alleged big deal should have a little more reaction and interest than it has, besides fucking enormous sales and profit figures for the participants. Is that really all it is about, as the critics say? This is the best all or nothing example I have seen, and fairly easily testable compared to most.
Otherwise each day passes with more or less activity, amazingly despite intermittent health problems I've got my chores done, they were just a lot harder than they would have been. Just like my 97 year old grandma, although I now do a lot less, every little job can feel like an achievement. But looking back the main thing I see is they were done. I hadn't taken my albums anywhere else yet but no rush for that, and the pictures I've taken are adding to the next one anyway. In a way besides knowing where to look I've gone to the trouble of driving around for ages taking them, although if you were given a map you could probably polish most of them off in a week. And spend a packet on a good camera as well. I've technically finished my list now, and am finally looking around gardens just in case I see any more nice ones like today. But I've done every decent road within 5 miles of Kingsbury and although I can go to Bushey eventually it isn't that great really. Plus half my relatives are there after they died. It has two associations for me, years of horse riding and the cemetery. We used to go shopping there as well and bought a car in the big Honda garage as well. The health food shop owner also gave me piano lessons for a while. When in doubt trawl past memories.
Beyond that lies Hatch End which has a few possibilities, and used to be one of my shops of choice when I lived near there as it was quiet and easy to park. Pinner has already had all the best photos done on film as we had a friend there years ago. The Northwood and Ruislip which really aren't that photogenic and not worth the trip. In all other directions are run down dumps, Kilburn, Hornsey, and the other way miles of faceless suburbs like Southgate and Palmers Green which are like the dark side in comparison to where I usually go. One day when I get a contact in TV I'll get a documentary walking the London suburbs making my usual comments on how many testicles would buy a house in Hampstead Garden Suburb or how many gangsters live in a street in Stanmore. You can also tell the areas to avoid by the taxi quotient or TQ. When I lived in Canons Park it was about 1 in 10, second only to Ilford and besides one friend who is far from typical all the ones who call the radio are total stereotypes, frustrated professors and politicians. OK, it takes a mechanical memory to pass the knowledge but it's the easiest actual job on earth once you pass, high fares and hours by choice. What could be better? I refused to take my law finals as I knew what the job involved and didn't see the point in qualifying to do a job I couldn't stand. I tried a few other courses and ended up with one not recognised by the state so basically bloody useless. Very helpful to the clients but not one to make a living in.
Besides taxi driving writing articles from home is another well paid holiday, and if I can screw the right person I may one day become published. Actually if I could screw anyone it would be quite nice. Especially if female, and human. Any considered. Time is running out and I can't be too choosy...
Friday, April 20, 2007
Any progress?
What the hell I need to write here to get things going again is probably non existent. I could write the equivalent of a best selling novel and still get the same 9 hard core readers (please don't desert me as well) and wonder if people have stopped reading and writing blogs what has replaced it. Don't ask me. I still do my photo site but don't stop things I was doing before. Anyway. It's only just gone Friday but I may as well look back at the week so far, little else to do. Nice weather, went to Hampstead, Willesden and Dollis Hill (as a result of the previous Willesden visit being diverted to avoid traffic) and I went back today and saw if you look either side of Dollis Hill Avenue you can see north and south of London to both borders. I got a picture of each though ought to use a new memory card to get high definition.
I even started the housework today, emptied some rubbish, washed up and did some washing, which flooded the kitchen as the 30 year old outlet had split. I cut off a few inches and hopefully the remainder is now watertight again. I didn't make one phone call today but should tomorrow, some people have really been left behind and I should do something about it. The weekly trip to my mum has photos each time when it's light, and I have a couple of ideas though of course the new places and angles have virtually run out after so long.
Otherwise I seem to have used up every attempt to analyse and improve life directly or indirectly. This malarkey about attracting what you think about is either true or not and that's as simple as that. Just see if anyone bothers to try it after seeing the DVD. These groups of spiritual pursuits inspire but rarely seem to do more. I did get a massive 3rd eye dream after a Sai Baba service as well as some more clairvoyance, and I did go a few times before the constant repetition became too much to bother. If I had no alternative methods I would have carried on more but it's not the only one by any means.
My lack of major plans is more realistic than before as even when I did, besides keeping me busy didn't often produce any results. Things do seem to just happen when the time is ready or not at all. If there are entities in other dimensions able to see and hear us and influence our lives invisibly I wonder why, with all this power, they'd piss around like children with ant's nests and magnifying glasses. If they can help for christ's sake do something helpful. And more than cancelling the odd nasty arrangement at the last minute. Something of a profit. The fact a few people I know claim to be in contact with these guys yet are unable to transfer their channeling to other people leaves me a bit skeptical. Despite now having three people channel the same information, two through Sasha despite having no knowledge of the other, keeps me looking, but although they give me (meaningless) messages indirectly they seem to be unable or unwilling to contact me directly though they say I need a professional hypnotic regression to do it. My arse, I don't even know anyone else let alone anyone who does it free like I do. Something like that would open up what seems like being buried alive and would be my open door to something better. All these projects start well but never get any further. A few need money to build equipment and the rest just fizzle out.
The people who say I think too deeply miss the point. There's sod all else to do and if I can think that deeply it's a waste not to, many people couldn't if you trained them for years. It's like telling Picasso not to paint so well. I know I can't do lateral thinking well but then again doubt you can get anywhere any quicker when you can. It's like trying to play in two keys at the same time and I do clarity. I don't know if anyone can combine direct and indirect thought or you must stick to one or the other. When I get stuck I ask other people and believe me, when I'm stumped almost everyone else is even more. And the few who seem to know offer methods that appear to have no effect either. Well it's late again so I'd better go to bed before I get hooked again, tell your friends about blogspot as we need more active members although it's still apparently impossible to search for blogs now. Maybe they want it to die?
I even started the housework today, emptied some rubbish, washed up and did some washing, which flooded the kitchen as the 30 year old outlet had split. I cut off a few inches and hopefully the remainder is now watertight again. I didn't make one phone call today but should tomorrow, some people have really been left behind and I should do something about it. The weekly trip to my mum has photos each time when it's light, and I have a couple of ideas though of course the new places and angles have virtually run out after so long.
Otherwise I seem to have used up every attempt to analyse and improve life directly or indirectly. This malarkey about attracting what you think about is either true or not and that's as simple as that. Just see if anyone bothers to try it after seeing the DVD. These groups of spiritual pursuits inspire but rarely seem to do more. I did get a massive 3rd eye dream after a Sai Baba service as well as some more clairvoyance, and I did go a few times before the constant repetition became too much to bother. If I had no alternative methods I would have carried on more but it's not the only one by any means.
My lack of major plans is more realistic than before as even when I did, besides keeping me busy didn't often produce any results. Things do seem to just happen when the time is ready or not at all. If there are entities in other dimensions able to see and hear us and influence our lives invisibly I wonder why, with all this power, they'd piss around like children with ant's nests and magnifying glasses. If they can help for christ's sake do something helpful. And more than cancelling the odd nasty arrangement at the last minute. Something of a profit. The fact a few people I know claim to be in contact with these guys yet are unable to transfer their channeling to other people leaves me a bit skeptical. Despite now having three people channel the same information, two through Sasha despite having no knowledge of the other, keeps me looking, but although they give me (meaningless) messages indirectly they seem to be unable or unwilling to contact me directly though they say I need a professional hypnotic regression to do it. My arse, I don't even know anyone else let alone anyone who does it free like I do. Something like that would open up what seems like being buried alive and would be my open door to something better. All these projects start well but never get any further. A few need money to build equipment and the rest just fizzle out.
The people who say I think too deeply miss the point. There's sod all else to do and if I can think that deeply it's a waste not to, many people couldn't if you trained them for years. It's like telling Picasso not to paint so well. I know I can't do lateral thinking well but then again doubt you can get anywhere any quicker when you can. It's like trying to play in two keys at the same time and I do clarity. I don't know if anyone can combine direct and indirect thought or you must stick to one or the other. When I get stuck I ask other people and believe me, when I'm stumped almost everyone else is even more. And the few who seem to know offer methods that appear to have no effect either. Well it's late again so I'd better go to bed before I get hooked again, tell your friends about blogspot as we need more active members although it's still apparently impossible to search for blogs now. Maybe they want it to die?
Thursday, April 19, 2007
It all comes to a stop
If life really does go through phases this is the boring one. I do my best to keep busy but the trouble is whatever I do finishes and it's back to nothing. Nothing that has ended leaves an effect in the present so although on paer I've done a reasonable amount, besides some photos on a website the rest is gone. How long this phase will last is not a question that can even be asked, except that normally once I see a phase it means it's ending. These are the only reasons the totally unbelievable idea we attract what we think about may be real. It happens to me and nothing else would explain it.
Not only that but my plans for the week, although followed, ended today and it's only just gone Wednesday. Tomorrow is free until someone comes over in the evening and unless I go for tea in a new kosher cafe in a park in Temple Fortune (on my own) I may not even leave the house whatever the weather. The last two days may have completed my photo list, with some nice ones of Hampstead Heath and some trains in Willesden. After a traffic jam so slow half the people including me did a u turn (where two weeks earlier had been totally clear) and luckily there was a long way round which didn't have much traffic. Willesden High Road is a perfect example of London and every other urban hell on earth. I took photos there once as it was where the Routemaster buses went but the area itself is one straight from Dickens and representative of half of London. Then due to following the railway I did use a few roads I never had and discovered 1930s suburbia does extend further than I realised. Due to the traffic I didn't stop so may return tomorrow. That's one idea at least. So I'm becoming familiar with the back doubles and blocked roads of Dollis Hill. Fascinating.
I am about to search new blogger to see if there are any new ways of finding other blogs, if not it would explain why new readers can't find me as I couldn't find them either. It would be a design fault to end all design faults but stupidity is not a limited quality as anyone can see. Also I don't think the post a photo works from flickr now either, but as what I'm writing may be putting people off I think a couple of pictures may be a welcome diversion.
This is Willesden Green station seen through the bars of the railings, limiting any angle I could get, and was pleased this was more or less how I wanted it. I got a number from the nearby bridge including some trains so had quite a good result for the day's efforts. Had they not put in parking meters I may well have returned more to Willesden Green although not buying more trainers stopped one shop, and besides the charity shops and the jewellers (again, no longer required for gold jewellery) I suppose there wasn't much point going just to look any more. Costs are amazing now. It may cost £1 to park for the average shopping trip, but the bus would cost about £3 altogether and the train at least £4. Basically living in London is just plain fucking expsnsive whichever way you travel, so I now either use a bike or retail parks which are free to park in, although Brent Cross will not be for much longer. And whatever shit we have in London probably applies to the whole country sooner or later. Congestion charging will spread, road humps are national and parking charges probably universal. Despite the dollar reaching a low not seen since the 60s petrol went up 20p or so a gallon in a week and the oil price hasn't even changed. They say it'll be £1 a litre soon and that's for life. And of course it's not to do with saving the planet or the public transport would be cheaper than driving but they put the prices up now because too many people were using it. And not April the first like the barbecue charge turned out to be. And public transport prices are the same for rich and poor so favour the rich and as the poor still need to travel forces them to spend more on that than other options. Lovely country we live in...
Not only that but my plans for the week, although followed, ended today and it's only just gone Wednesday. Tomorrow is free until someone comes over in the evening and unless I go for tea in a new kosher cafe in a park in Temple Fortune (on my own) I may not even leave the house whatever the weather. The last two days may have completed my photo list, with some nice ones of Hampstead Heath and some trains in Willesden. After a traffic jam so slow half the people including me did a u turn (where two weeks earlier had been totally clear) and luckily there was a long way round which didn't have much traffic. Willesden High Road is a perfect example of London and every other urban hell on earth. I took photos there once as it was where the Routemaster buses went but the area itself is one straight from Dickens and representative of half of London. Then due to following the railway I did use a few roads I never had and discovered 1930s suburbia does extend further than I realised. Due to the traffic I didn't stop so may return tomorrow. That's one idea at least. So I'm becoming familiar with the back doubles and blocked roads of Dollis Hill. Fascinating.
I am about to search new blogger to see if there are any new ways of finding other blogs, if not it would explain why new readers can't find me as I couldn't find them either. It would be a design fault to end all design faults but stupidity is not a limited quality as anyone can see. Also I don't think the post a photo works from flickr now either, but as what I'm writing may be putting people off I think a couple of pictures may be a welcome diversion.
This is Willesden Green station seen through the bars of the railings, limiting any angle I could get, and was pleased this was more or less how I wanted it. I got a number from the nearby bridge including some trains so had quite a good result for the day's efforts. Had they not put in parking meters I may well have returned more to Willesden Green although not buying more trainers stopped one shop, and besides the charity shops and the jewellers (again, no longer required for gold jewellery) I suppose there wasn't much point going just to look any more. Costs are amazing now. It may cost £1 to park for the average shopping trip, but the bus would cost about £3 altogether and the train at least £4. Basically living in London is just plain fucking expsnsive whichever way you travel, so I now either use a bike or retail parks which are free to park in, although Brent Cross will not be for much longer. And whatever shit we have in London probably applies to the whole country sooner or later. Congestion charging will spread, road humps are national and parking charges probably universal. Despite the dollar reaching a low not seen since the 60s petrol went up 20p or so a gallon in a week and the oil price hasn't even changed. They say it'll be £1 a litre soon and that's for life. And of course it's not to do with saving the planet or the public transport would be cheaper than driving but they put the prices up now because too many people were using it. And not April the first like the barbecue charge turned out to be. And public transport prices are the same for rich and poor so favour the rich and as the poor still need to travel forces them to spend more on that than other options. Lovely country we live in... Sunday, April 15, 2007
Life as a geek
It has gone very quiet. Whether or not my photo ideas are drying up the next project is clearing the house up, which can't be a bad thing. The last two weeks were almost exactly as planned, which meant I kept myself busy, and despite having no awful things to do ahead running out of material still makes things potentially pretty boring. I have discovered not only does my main website have a number of unique internet entries, but now everyone mentioned there has followed them up and I now know the details of Armaretta cars, made in America from 1985-8, and the one I saw apparently only one of 30.
I will have to see. So far there's pretty much a free week ahead, and I have a few little ideas to fill it as usual. Especially as the weather seems to have improved. I've also discovered TV on demand is now up and running, but only available to Sky subscribers or 3G phones (not 3 ones though) for £5 a month, and the full schedules aren't published. My 3rd programme is due but not out yet, and despite not being a Sky subscriber I won't be able to see it any other way besides online with a password, assuming they let me have one (having given up half a day for free for them). Why it is people on TV either get paid a fortune or nothing is a bit strange but they probably cover the huge salaries for the stars by paying the wanabees sod all. At least they didn't want me to pay to appear.
When there's little happening all the minor jobs become more noticed. Haircuts, car washes, gardening etc. Like any other retired geriatric except it can happen at any age when forced on you by life. No one wants to have a totally empty life but when left alone with nothing but a TV radio and computer there's not much else worth doing, and whatever else I do one of them is usually going at the same time. And if I go out besides family there are few if any friends left to visit, and I either piss around local shops as we all have to or go to the park if I'm not taking photos. Or I go there and take the camera with me. One thing fame or a media career would do is break this monotony, I could write and do interviews and get paid as well. As well as meeting people. The more photo albums I get in the area will be the next step so it keeps creeping ahead. The Discovery Kids channel which was dumped through their own lack of effort is going online, but currently although free only has 4 programmes on it. Hardly the same is it? If they intend to expand they may put mine on so everyone I know can see it online. I expect I'll end up doing more UFO programmes as there aren't many other people in the country doing what I do so a fairly captive audience.
I may be linking the blog to another site soon as they seem to have got all the activity we lost here, although besides losing the profile interest links is still the best one from the ones available. I suspect losing the interest links was the last nail in the coffin as unless you bookmark other blogs you can no longer search others in blogger which makes it impossible to find any new ones. Not that anyone adds any more but that'll stop any expansion. I sometimes wonder if anyone else is stuck in my sort of situation. Some overlap but I don't remember anyone with all the circumstances, especially once you include my minimal family size. OK, I'm not an orphan but realised the main reason I didn't fit in with peer groups for 25 years was because I spent most of my time with my parents who had nothing in common with them. And if not my parents then alone as they worked full time and my mother was gone by the time I was 21 anyway. I had to guess how to fit in as I knew people were impressed by certain clothes and attitudes but had no idea what they were. The only time I really did was with the hippies, but at 7 or 8 was too young to really join in although it felt absolutely right for me. Being like that in the 80s doesn't really work in Thatcher's Britain and despising modern fashions and the sheep who followed them meant I never fitted in even with my close friends. I was always a novelty, a freak show who they watched for entertainment as much as seeing for company, and I played up to it. I still do really, although I want to make that image one Woody Allen uses in his films and makes a career from it. I do exagerrate certain things of course simply as I can see people remember it. Clive Bull, who I've called on LBC for 20 years, has now pigeonholed me as the class A geek, so uses me to ask about the internet, collecting and public transport as he knows I can always talk about it. I have profited from pushing the image as at least it's a niche I happily fit into. Of course I prefer sex to car number plates but I can go outside and spot plates all day (and have, believe me) but not have sex. So it seems I'm more into my hobbies but without a girlfriend or wife there's nothing else left to do. But it's not all there is, just all there is to do. That's totally different.
I will have to see. So far there's pretty much a free week ahead, and I have a few little ideas to fill it as usual. Especially as the weather seems to have improved. I've also discovered TV on demand is now up and running, but only available to Sky subscribers or 3G phones (not 3 ones though) for £5 a month, and the full schedules aren't published. My 3rd programme is due but not out yet, and despite not being a Sky subscriber I won't be able to see it any other way besides online with a password, assuming they let me have one (having given up half a day for free for them). Why it is people on TV either get paid a fortune or nothing is a bit strange but they probably cover the huge salaries for the stars by paying the wanabees sod all. At least they didn't want me to pay to appear.
When there's little happening all the minor jobs become more noticed. Haircuts, car washes, gardening etc. Like any other retired geriatric except it can happen at any age when forced on you by life. No one wants to have a totally empty life but when left alone with nothing but a TV radio and computer there's not much else worth doing, and whatever else I do one of them is usually going at the same time. And if I go out besides family there are few if any friends left to visit, and I either piss around local shops as we all have to or go to the park if I'm not taking photos. Or I go there and take the camera with me. One thing fame or a media career would do is break this monotony, I could write and do interviews and get paid as well. As well as meeting people. The more photo albums I get in the area will be the next step so it keeps creeping ahead. The Discovery Kids channel which was dumped through their own lack of effort is going online, but currently although free only has 4 programmes on it. Hardly the same is it? If they intend to expand they may put mine on so everyone I know can see it online. I expect I'll end up doing more UFO programmes as there aren't many other people in the country doing what I do so a fairly captive audience.
I may be linking the blog to another site soon as they seem to have got all the activity we lost here, although besides losing the profile interest links is still the best one from the ones available. I suspect losing the interest links was the last nail in the coffin as unless you bookmark other blogs you can no longer search others in blogger which makes it impossible to find any new ones. Not that anyone adds any more but that'll stop any expansion. I sometimes wonder if anyone else is stuck in my sort of situation. Some overlap but I don't remember anyone with all the circumstances, especially once you include my minimal family size. OK, I'm not an orphan but realised the main reason I didn't fit in with peer groups for 25 years was because I spent most of my time with my parents who had nothing in common with them. And if not my parents then alone as they worked full time and my mother was gone by the time I was 21 anyway. I had to guess how to fit in as I knew people were impressed by certain clothes and attitudes but had no idea what they were. The only time I really did was with the hippies, but at 7 or 8 was too young to really join in although it felt absolutely right for me. Being like that in the 80s doesn't really work in Thatcher's Britain and despising modern fashions and the sheep who followed them meant I never fitted in even with my close friends. I was always a novelty, a freak show who they watched for entertainment as much as seeing for company, and I played up to it. I still do really, although I want to make that image one Woody Allen uses in his films and makes a career from it. I do exagerrate certain things of course simply as I can see people remember it. Clive Bull, who I've called on LBC for 20 years, has now pigeonholed me as the class A geek, so uses me to ask about the internet, collecting and public transport as he knows I can always talk about it. I have profited from pushing the image as at least it's a niche I happily fit into. Of course I prefer sex to car number plates but I can go outside and spot plates all day (and have, believe me) but not have sex. So it seems I'm more into my hobbies but without a girlfriend or wife there's nothing else left to do. But it's not all there is, just all there is to do. That's totally different.
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Back again, again
I see it's been a while. Probably a good sign as it means I was busy and didn't have time to write here, but also there wasn't much to write. Planning has been good, and each week for the last few has been closer to how I planned it than the last. The good news being there was enough each day to fill it usefully. Besides a little work on Wednesday and doing my mum's garden today it's been photos every day. I worked my way through each flickr group, and have done buses and gardens after the stations last time. And I'm pleased with the results. Other than that I've hardly done a thing but haven't really noticed.
I have also started this year's gardening, done in record time for a change, possibly as I did more last year so wasn't overgrown. But it has been pretty quiet but reasonably tolerable. Only the anticlimax of the empty house at night which rather than get used to becomes like the Chinese water torture and wears me down gradually. So having reported a whole week's activity what do I do to fill the remaining space?
Outer stories dry up like an ancient vagina. All these portents of changes and developments actually leave us with a world just as it was before but more boring. Global warming would liven things up if it happened, the TV coverage of floods and the like would be like New Orleans and the tsunami all the time and the companies would double the viewers. That's why it's still snowing across half the USA this week and I think they'd enjoy it as much as we would here in England. If only. I've forgotten all the other distant predictions as they never happened, and even the stupid internet TV programme I was in hasn't been on a month after unofficially scheduled. Big news is rarer than people realise as most they see is possible, never happened and then forgotten about. War in Iraq was not news, it was a waste of our money and didn't affect us here one bit besides raising our taxes to pay for it. Terrorism is not news, it's the lowest of the low behaving like savages and no relevance to life or society, just scum. The biggest news of 2007 has been the release of the TX4 London cab, the first new car to go on the road in the UK with an older style than the previous (unlike Japan who had loads). I called the radio twice about it and also got to talk about Funtrivia and other transport related stuff which brought in many more enthusiasts.
I have also now got two friends on Funtrivia after 7 years, though neither have posted anything yet. I have no plans now. Tomorrow will be the live online quiz if awake, and that's it until I go to the gym. No photos as I took every one on my list this week. If it's as nice as they predict I may go out on my bike again. The car wash was finally working the 4th time of trying, so it now almost looks like new. Socially it's been dead besides 2 clients (OK, shouldn't count) and talking to the woman next door while doing the garden, but I was too busy to notice. Well, I mustn't look ahead as I'm not there yet so will stop that now, and if this blog has become boring then try being here. I'm not complaining now as it wasn't too bad, but certainly not worth reporting, but I'm all out of fantasy now and also run out of poo jokes. Took me 47 years but it happened. That's showbiz...
I have also started this year's gardening, done in record time for a change, possibly as I did more last year so wasn't overgrown. But it has been pretty quiet but reasonably tolerable. Only the anticlimax of the empty house at night which rather than get used to becomes like the Chinese water torture and wears me down gradually. So having reported a whole week's activity what do I do to fill the remaining space?
Outer stories dry up like an ancient vagina. All these portents of changes and developments actually leave us with a world just as it was before but more boring. Global warming would liven things up if it happened, the TV coverage of floods and the like would be like New Orleans and the tsunami all the time and the companies would double the viewers. That's why it's still snowing across half the USA this week and I think they'd enjoy it as much as we would here in England. If only. I've forgotten all the other distant predictions as they never happened, and even the stupid internet TV programme I was in hasn't been on a month after unofficially scheduled. Big news is rarer than people realise as most they see is possible, never happened and then forgotten about. War in Iraq was not news, it was a waste of our money and didn't affect us here one bit besides raising our taxes to pay for it. Terrorism is not news, it's the lowest of the low behaving like savages and no relevance to life or society, just scum. The biggest news of 2007 has been the release of the TX4 London cab, the first new car to go on the road in the UK with an older style than the previous (unlike Japan who had loads). I called the radio twice about it and also got to talk about Funtrivia and other transport related stuff which brought in many more enthusiasts.
I have also now got two friends on Funtrivia after 7 years, though neither have posted anything yet. I have no plans now. Tomorrow will be the live online quiz if awake, and that's it until I go to the gym. No photos as I took every one on my list this week. If it's as nice as they predict I may go out on my bike again. The car wash was finally working the 4th time of trying, so it now almost looks like new. Socially it's been dead besides 2 clients (OK, shouldn't count) and talking to the woman next door while doing the garden, but I was too busy to notice. Well, I mustn't look ahead as I'm not there yet so will stop that now, and if this blog has become boring then try being here. I'm not complaining now as it wasn't too bad, but certainly not worth reporting, but I'm all out of fantasy now and also run out of poo jokes. Took me 47 years but it happened. That's showbiz...
Monday, April 09, 2007
In a world of my own
If possible we should laugh at life. Take nothing too seriously. It's marginally easier to do this with other people's problems than our own, but it can work. I can't see much to laugh at, do or anything else at the moment, though I am getting to know someone better and better who is taken, too young, unsuitable and one of the only women I know at the moment besides one who thinks I'm too young (as if that was possible) who has any effect on me. I get more from spending a little time with her than a lot with most other women, even if something actually happens. It's the quality that counts and I saw it the first day I ever saw her and it grows each time since. That's one example of letting it happen out of my control, it's got its own momentum and however unlikely any progress would be I am happy the way things are going as they are.
So, possibly for the first time blogger removed 2 paragraphs. I removed a third as it made me look like more of a geek than I really am. Yes, it is possible. I basically was repeating the same story as usual in different ways and may have done everyone a favour losing it all. So I have to replace it with something. It was only because there was nothing else to do and I was listening to web radio I came back here at all. I also said I seem to have lost everyone but family and cat, the other people being either like the sort of people you see every day on the bsu and recognise but rarely if ever speak to, and the others less than useful. Worse than neutral. But even in prison people usually prefer to be sharing a cell with a couple of perverts than solitary. But my experience with tenants showed this not to be the case. I've met a number of evil men but possibly just the one woman, who shared my house for 9 months. Anyone who saw the witches in Dr Who last weekend she made them look like Margaret Thatcher and Shirley Williams. She was the real deal. One person (I was aware of) wouldn't even come in my house because of her.
So I appear to be surrounded by a cast of Twilight Zone meets One flew over the cuckoo's nest. And a bit of Rain Man, not that I saw it. Even Forrest Gump would be an improvement but I do know a few as well. Having a diary I can mention the week ahead, having done the station photos last week, despite very few variations it's bus photos next. That or sod all. Then mow the lawn, work on Wednesday and the rest is mystery. Predictable possibly but last week was actually pretty good. Five straight days of photos, no work as described yesterday, and a little necessary shopping. Maybe the lack of life will force me to meditate more as whatever else happens that is always the same. Not the results but the system. And it can't make me worse and usually makes me better, even for a few minutes. Just for fun (I am bored) it's April so I'll quickly review 2007's little highs so far. I have:
Interestingly the computer ate this paragraph. Just read the earlier entries and you'll find out, it was fuck all really, who was I ever trying to kid.
I may have missed a few things and as this clearly has a bug and ate another paragraph the angels are trying to stop me. I did point out this is as good as therapy, free and get as much feedback as many in analysis, and if I can work things out here others may learn as well. Though people vary I can only assume we all share the same spectrum of feelings, as do animals, and problems are the same whoever you are. Only so many with personal variations. Well before this arsehole of a computer kills any more of my writing I'd better save this and piss off.
So, possibly for the first time blogger removed 2 paragraphs. I removed a third as it made me look like more of a geek than I really am. Yes, it is possible. I basically was repeating the same story as usual in different ways and may have done everyone a favour losing it all. So I have to replace it with something. It was only because there was nothing else to do and I was listening to web radio I came back here at all. I also said I seem to have lost everyone but family and cat, the other people being either like the sort of people you see every day on the bsu and recognise but rarely if ever speak to, and the others less than useful. Worse than neutral. But even in prison people usually prefer to be sharing a cell with a couple of perverts than solitary. But my experience with tenants showed this not to be the case. I've met a number of evil men but possibly just the one woman, who shared my house for 9 months. Anyone who saw the witches in Dr Who last weekend she made them look like Margaret Thatcher and Shirley Williams. She was the real deal. One person (I was aware of) wouldn't even come in my house because of her.
So I appear to be surrounded by a cast of Twilight Zone meets One flew over the cuckoo's nest. And a bit of Rain Man, not that I saw it. Even Forrest Gump would be an improvement but I do know a few as well. Having a diary I can mention the week ahead, having done the station photos last week, despite very few variations it's bus photos next. That or sod all. Then mow the lawn, work on Wednesday and the rest is mystery. Predictable possibly but last week was actually pretty good. Five straight days of photos, no work as described yesterday, and a little necessary shopping. Maybe the lack of life will force me to meditate more as whatever else happens that is always the same. Not the results but the system. And it can't make me worse and usually makes me better, even for a few minutes. Just for fun (I am bored) it's April so I'll quickly review 2007's little highs so far. I have:
Interestingly the computer ate this paragraph. Just read the earlier entries and you'll find out, it was fuck all really, who was I ever trying to kid.
I may have missed a few things and as this clearly has a bug and ate another paragraph the angels are trying to stop me. I did point out this is as good as therapy, free and get as much feedback as many in analysis, and if I can work things out here others may learn as well. Though people vary I can only assume we all share the same spectrum of feelings, as do animals, and problems are the same whoever you are. Only so many with personal variations. Well before this arsehole of a computer kills any more of my writing I'd better save this and piss off.
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Gone rather quiet
A busy week taking photos, filing and little else besides a couple of hours doing my mum's garden. But looking back there's sod all now and ahead unless I think of things when the time comes. But you can run out with no work and precious few friends. A real challenge.
Otherwise my life and mind are blank. I see a hard core of regular visitors here so at least I'm not writing for nothing. Knowing how little I had to report was also a challenge and as I've written every variation on philosophy and bodily functions here, plus plenty of nostalgia there's not a lot left in the system.
So many authors and composers say they are apparently taken over when writing, Jung and Freud would say it was a blockage from the creative subconscious but I'm not so sure, especially with talents and information beyond their own. This should happen to me now, I'm open to it and in the past I've put together some pretty good ideas straight off with no planning that only formed as I wrote them.
One question is how long, if at all, will it take for the majority to realise global warming is created to steal our money and not a realistic issue. The evidence is overwhelming but the press on regardless as most people don't believe the authorities capable of such a con. I wish. Even the first line of attack fails as many scientists say the temperatures aren't rising at all. If experts can disagree even on this I'd give up already but no. And if it was, a) I'd say it's a good thing (saving energy and hypothermia) and b) we couldn't do a thing to stop it. End of. Just a little climate variation at a faster than average pace. Big fucking deal. They blew it up to look like the martians were coming and without the slightest criticism the majority of people accepted the figures all based on things happening in 2080. I am reaching a level of major authority after collecting as many links and statistics that even if a fraction are true means the whole thing is made up. The TV programme said most of it and may have won a few over but the momentum appears to carry on. If it wasn't an excuse to steal more of our money (obtaining money by deception is theft) I couldn't care less how scared people were based on absolutely nothing but that's why they made it up in the first place. For any doubters just remembered how they arranged attacking Iraq which cost us all so much they need a reason to rob us to get it back.
So there's one paragraph I'd need many years to prove and would rather in a way was true as Britain would do very well from global warming, although they'd still pretend it was our fault and tax the world to poverty. If it wasn't for that detail it would be easier to believe but it's only a very effective way to take our money.
The other minor issue that may or may not be a fairy story is the new DVD The Secret I recently watched. That's a simple answer. Try it and see if it works. If it does there's no need to understand why. The first example I see working (remember, it works for all thoughts, good, bad and indifferent, is I predicted last week an unknown American would win the Master's golf and Zach Johnson is just about to in 10 minutes or so. Boring and predictable, but if the universe is in me then only I make it all happen, but that's a different DVD. But either way it's all I can experience and it's become extremely boring at the moment every way I look. But for how long?
Otherwise my life and mind are blank. I see a hard core of regular visitors here so at least I'm not writing for nothing. Knowing how little I had to report was also a challenge and as I've written every variation on philosophy and bodily functions here, plus plenty of nostalgia there's not a lot left in the system.
So many authors and composers say they are apparently taken over when writing, Jung and Freud would say it was a blockage from the creative subconscious but I'm not so sure, especially with talents and information beyond their own. This should happen to me now, I'm open to it and in the past I've put together some pretty good ideas straight off with no planning that only formed as I wrote them.
One question is how long, if at all, will it take for the majority to realise global warming is created to steal our money and not a realistic issue. The evidence is overwhelming but the press on regardless as most people don't believe the authorities capable of such a con. I wish. Even the first line of attack fails as many scientists say the temperatures aren't rising at all. If experts can disagree even on this I'd give up already but no. And if it was, a) I'd say it's a good thing (saving energy and hypothermia) and b) we couldn't do a thing to stop it. End of. Just a little climate variation at a faster than average pace. Big fucking deal. They blew it up to look like the martians were coming and without the slightest criticism the majority of people accepted the figures all based on things happening in 2080. I am reaching a level of major authority after collecting as many links and statistics that even if a fraction are true means the whole thing is made up. The TV programme said most of it and may have won a few over but the momentum appears to carry on. If it wasn't an excuse to steal more of our money (obtaining money by deception is theft) I couldn't care less how scared people were based on absolutely nothing but that's why they made it up in the first place. For any doubters just remembered how they arranged attacking Iraq which cost us all so much they need a reason to rob us to get it back.
So there's one paragraph I'd need many years to prove and would rather in a way was true as Britain would do very well from global warming, although they'd still pretend it was our fault and tax the world to poverty. If it wasn't for that detail it would be easier to believe but it's only a very effective way to take our money.
The other minor issue that may or may not be a fairy story is the new DVD The Secret I recently watched. That's a simple answer. Try it and see if it works. If it does there's no need to understand why. The first example I see working (remember, it works for all thoughts, good, bad and indifferent, is I predicted last week an unknown American would win the Master's golf and Zach Johnson is just about to in 10 minutes or so. Boring and predictable, but if the universe is in me then only I make it all happen, but that's a different DVD. But either way it's all I can experience and it's become extremely boring at the moment every way I look. But for how long?
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