This should normally be posted on my spiritual blog, but that is for positive direct teaching, while this is purely observation, and by its nature possibly negative.
For me one of the best ways to solve a mess is to write it down. With the benefit of the internet I can share it with others.
My lifetime of searching has ultimately been for God, initially through god-like powers, then to the direct source itself, and life after death as I believe limiting our huge amounts of knowledge gained in under a century and wiping it all out is pointless. Imagine the wisdom we'd have if we did regenerate and retain what we knew before. This way all the abilities and benefits you could have for other people are just gone. Apparently.
I have never been too concerned about heaven and hell after death, as the evidence suggests if we do survive it is a mixture, just like here. I have one solid account of hell (as in eternal, which should also break every single one of God's laws) and even that (so far as I haven't finished it) was not permanent, however awful it was.
My concern is that we carry on after death as awareness, and heaven and hell are right here and now, heaven being the temporary drift into a situation where everything's OK, so we become aware it exists, and hell the reverse. Additionally, knowing we can easily slip into hell, but not into heaven, should be sufficient as a potential threat to know during this life we can enter hell randomly at any moment, so our corresponding heaven is conditional. Dreams amplify both ends to let us know things can be potentially extreme at either end.
But I believe, at whatever level and duration, I have experienced both, and I expect so has everyone else. Spiritual practice, primarily Buddhism, shows you how to escape this while alive, but of course very few make it out, and are said to need innumerate lives to complete the task (if they ever do), returning to heaven/hell not after death but during each lifetime. So my equations are find we do survive death, and have a connection to God while we are alive to help us become enlightened (ie free of suffering) as it's not something anyone can do on their own and literally would need divine help. See my summary of evidence here. Evidence of the supernatural
Now to relate it directly to my life. Without going into details, like Job, I had everything taken away from me, besides the very basics. Some has since returned to make life tolerable, and I appreciate that. And yes, I did add a little more by my own efforts which can't be taken away from me as far as I am aware. But the point is despite seeing guidance all around me in my life and of others, I first saw negative guidance (which I recently have come across in other teaching), where you are forced into a bad situation whatever you do last year, and am now fully aware it is still 'supernatural guidance' but not all for our direct benefit. While one major part of my life is slowly building back (literally in this case as it's my house), the other side has stopped in its tracks with no means of progress, ie on the academic side. It has limited my career (what's left of it approaching retirement age, it was still something I could have carried on freelance), albeit not totally, but ended one of my final personal ambitions, whatever the details.
Now having covered manifestation videos claiming in numerous ways we can co-create with God, as well as spiritual videos saying every bad event is a learning experience, losing a limb or your house to me is paying more than you need to to learn anything. As Bones said in the Star Trek film, 'I know you are not God as God does not threaten or bribe people' (to paraphrase). God is love, God is good. That's its nature, Satan is the lack of God blocked out by the cloud into darkness, so although the sun is there its rays are not reaching you, but you only need discretion to see right through it and be the source of your own light as an illusion is never real.
I have never believed in co-creation, manifestation or seeing the future. I've tried them all, and the closest I've seen in seeing the future would suggest the event was guaranteed to happen and anyone who did manage to see it correctly was simply following the thread of a fairly linear outcome. But it's not meant to be known and ruins our experience of the present. Who wants to read a novel or watch a film in the wrong order? However, with nothing to lose and an open mind I watch more and more material on manifestation by carrying out very simple practices, and at best, as one recently explained, we can send things towards that direction but they are far too complex to aim for anything specific, which I agree with. I, however, have always been clairvoyant, and strongest of all with the very worst messages. I could feel every exam failure when the letter arrived, and felt a planning permission failure the second the email arrived even though it said it had passed, a paragraph contradicted it as the architect had made a mistake in drawing the plans. My instant and extreme reaction each time told me exactly the result with no possible doubts. Once someone gave me the envelope with their degree result in it as he wanted me to tell him what it was as he was too worried to open it. I wavered and said it keeps switching between a 2-1 and a 2-2, and I couldn't get it to settle down. He opened it and it said a 2-1, and about the next day they called him to say it was a mistake and it was a 2-2. I had a few witnesses.
So, as the teaching goes, there are two levels of powers, minor such as clairvoyance which simply mirrors both radio waves and quantum physics, and major such as bilocation, levitation and manifestation. The minor ones are to me of little practical use, besides telling you what someone is like quickly long before you have enough information to find out over time, and whether claims and articles etc. are lying or not, which I suppose is quite useful but most people dismiss it and only other people who can see the same things know already and we just share confirmation with each other. But I had to go for the big stuff as that could totally revolutionise our life.
So back to heaven and hell. If in life you are given a lesson which is irreversible, ie you have no second or third chances etc to put it right, which happens to us all in one way or another, spiritual or not, does that negate the entire spiritual path for not just the victim but altogether? This is my question, and one I have no answer to besides the strictly physical logical answer that yes it must do, therefore all that is left is to look for evidence to find otherwise. As we are still here after a disaster where it is impossible to come back from, we have to continue or lives without a leg, a house, or whatever else has been lost, or a career impossible to follow as the course was beyond them, the next and hardest lesson yet is how to recover and take what has to be an equal or better path, otherwise you indeed spend the rest of your life closer to hell, which may as well not be there at all for such a poor quality. So you can't give up as you simply give in to Satan. But, like Jesus but not Job (as far as I know), you will doubt the existence of God altogether. Don't we get any help at all once we work with spirit? Are our angels, despite all their abilities, only allowed to intervene in either relatively ordinary situations or to save our lives but nothing in between?
So I have more questions than answers this time, and if the past is anything to go by, won't get any here as blogs dried up a decade ago, and outside here any answers will be as confused as my own. The one point here is I have been given a third riddle. One, life after death, two, discovering God directly, and three, coming back from a hellish situation. And the reason for that is no one should have to reach the third, although many do, and far worse than mine. But they are not relative to the victim, they are absolute, and therefore equal. I have the rest of my life to find even a crumb of a solution, and if one exists it will be discovered in time.
