Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Guidance and freedom

Life is getting back to normal again although minus the regular visits to grandma. I'll admit some was out of duty and she enjoyed the visits so much but I also made the most of her while I could. Tonight was the first Tuesday for as long as I can remember when I was free (besides when she was in hospital but sometimes saw her there as well) and needed a rest full stop after a hectic few weeks working and then last week's funeral related activities. Besides the worst of the gardening (more was prevented as the hedge cutters have finally had it) and a little walk it was TV most of the day and at least plenty to watch for a change, plus two cold callers I felt a religious duty to convert to being decent people. That is not a way to earn a living or create business, it's begging in the street and in a civilised country (oh, it isn't) would be included in the same laws.

Free tomorrow as well besides one late booking (I hope, unconfirmed), various little jobs I can be doing and probably will and the rest I will see. Guidance has been apparent again, and what better indication than road signs which can't be missed? I got an email yesterday evening with two locations nowhere near me I was able to get to on the way home, and got five, including two I didn't have already. So I could relax today having covered the width of London and collected a major supply of photos. I'm hoping to get a positive to paint the one I found last week as is nearby and a lot easier than the last one as two colours and my height. I can't do the library trip tomorrow as it's closed, but is on the list.

Now as the guidance is so clear then it can't just be for road signs. Besides running out if life can be arranged that tidily then it ought to work for everything now it's started. These gaps are only temporary so far and when filled in realise it's just as much as ever. Even my own hesitations and delays can't stop the direction. If I don't want to go to a woman that's suitable then she'll come to me if all is guided. Like I was shown signs when the lights turned red the delays make you look somewhere you would have missed otherwise. And when I make wrong turns I find things there as well as if made to. So if I'm being made to not visit some woman it's either as they don't want to know and I'd be wasting my time (been there, done that for 30 years) or did want me and would make the effort to come after me and prove it.

More clues on enlightenment from Youtube's teachers, whatever the route if you stick to your meditation come what may if your mind stops then you do as well. The three legged stool of Buddhism means whichever leg you lose the ego falls down, and when the mind stops it takes the ego with it. I'll keep going. I also found out this guy lives in London and although I chose not to join his school (too much work for me thanks) still learn just as much listening to his lessons.
I have a list of ambitions, raising any area to the level (some I've had and lost and others beyond) that would make me feel better. Many things could make it happen, I've missed out on hundreds of opportunities already but at least known they could have happened. The newspaper article would have been one example and very unlikely if it hadn't led to more. Any of the women who turned me down as well. Enlightenment means peace within so no old crap can get through to you, but till then it's reality first. I do realise however I've done it I have put in enough work now to earn everything I'd like to happen. I know when I get each part, even if I have no idea what form it could come in I'll know when it does. If the signs can be sent to me then so can everything else.

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