Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Gone a bit dead

It's interesting how I think the best you can do is roughly aim for something and then whatever will come takes over, like fishing but far less precise. I found someone on Facebook who wants to see me, of all the hundreds of people I've contacted this is only the third. I will see. And I actually found another old sign using Streetview which wasn't at all hard to get to either. I also reckon where the meeting is and what happens is also pretty well out of my control besides keeping it out of the centre of London. Like many things I see a certain age looming ahead and don't want to be past it before the good things finally arrive.

Besides a few work bookings there's nothing else planned ahead although the football friendlies are on so may actually get to one if convenient. I think expecting things is against both practical and spiritual rules and far better to get used to only being concerned with the present, however boring that may be. But the mind also assumes that will continue indefinitely if there's nothing ahead known to change it, but we never really know in reality.
So for a change it has made my mind a bit blank as well, which considering it's time for bed and I'm working tomorrow may have a good reason. I had no idea how much I'd written last time till I just scrolled through it and was amazed how so much can come for so little. I don't know how many people can be arsed to read more than about an A4 page, I suspect not many, but when I've something I like reading I can read quite a long way.

I'm sorry I haven't got much more to report for a change, it was too early to go to bed and for a change I'd run out of other websites which happens a couple of times a year. Those of you who are not single wouldn't have a clue what it's like to have to fill nearly all a day on your own. It's also inclined to make you appreciate the rare times you do speak to interesting people and make the most of it. Work doesn't really count as I can't even talk about myself as part of the rules. That's work and not conversation however interesting some of the people may be. I suppose there could be a place for counsellors who also light their farts (no I don't but others do), discuss their sex lives (never seen the need either), although one area that could never help is comparing your own problems which is the very thing many untrained people do (like my late grandma always did). 'You think you've got problems...' is the most pointless way to try and help anyone as you've instantly ignored them and switched to you. Still, I get well paid for such discipline and don't really slip up as it was always how things were done.

I also believe the offers so many counsellors claim they have for sex, male and female, is a bit of false advertising. After 17 years I've had no more than a couple of hints and from the stories I've heard in private the ones who claim more frequently act on it. It's one thing restraining your self interest but another rejecting it totally. Not that I believe many of them, unless I really am such a turn off. So having all these yawning gaps for a very long time I have just read they are the basis of stress and disease. Holy shit, what a surprise. Counselling aside I tell everyone you can't think of many problems when you're on the job with someone you actually like. And very few people disagree. That was one of the things nature got right, but then fucked up when it made women treat it like a currency that had to be earned. Bad mistake. People appreciate things when they have them, lose them and get them back again, not when they are rationed permanently. That's just socialism.

Well I think I've even bored myself but now stopped myself going to bed early which is a mixed blessing. There's always something that stops me, obviously excepting sex. In fact that's the only reason I go to bed early excluding illness. When there's someone to go to bed with then no reason not to. So any of you guys not appreciating your partners learn from those who have none. And if it's that bad then drop it as it's even worse being with the wrong person than alone as it's like a ball and chain. Empty freedom is better than that as I just about remember.

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