Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Nothing else to do

'May you live in interesting times' is a Chinese curse based on the same principle I mentioned the other day and echoed by teachers ever since. Excitement and activity is not concerned if good or bad, it just is. Pure chaos. So is demonstrated here. I pay too high a price for the activity but without readers a blog may as well not exist. If I gave up any activity that came at a cost I'd do even less than I do now and no one will stop me doing that.

After managing a day with my agoraphobia cure, the woman I used to go out with from Manchester, who dragged me to many of the places I didn't like in the past, and as a result made me cope with far more films, restaurants and discos than I would have otherwise. She made me take her round central London each time she came until I finally had enough and even yesterday got me doing far more than I would otherwise so that had its positive side. It can still be stressful though but I haven't really got anyone round here who insists so much I have to go to certain places. It would probably make me worse if I did though.
It rained most of today, my cleaner said she'd come in as she was away the weekend she would normally come, so I didn't go anywhere in case and she didn't turn up. Maybe I wrote the wrong date. So I did the little accounts entries left and then took some photos locally after the rain stopped for an hour. But not seeing anyone for a day shows by the end and with nothing on TV besides Big Brother really gets noticeable.

Currently I'm free, the only trip planned is the one to Walthamstow and then who knows what, plus I am taking the postcards round the shops where I took them but can already hear them say they want to pay a third of what they cost me. I suppose if I sign the back they'll be worth even less... Besides being gloss finish (who ever saw a postcard that looks like a normal photo?) they are very good quality, but can't see them selling at this price. So unless something dangerous intervenes I'll be doing one of those tomorrow. Unless it rains. The woman who has me in reserve just got back from holiday, she may phone soon and no doubt will do nothing about dumping her boyfriend as when you're next they never do. Or do and then don't want you anyway.

I can't think writing my CV in my blog would be of that much interest to many, even for context, and also as it would really need to be on my profile (even worse) otherwise you'd only know if you read the entry it was hiding in. And if I say I'm a psychotherapist that sort of implies certain minimum levels of qualification although legally you don't need any here. And even by the relatively young age of 48 your career has taken so many twists and turns even your own family can't keep up with it so why try on a blog? But as it'll eliminate some controversy I can kill another 10 minutes by doing a rough one here although unless I copy my certificates the very person who couldn't keep up wouldn't believe me anyway. No such word as trust for those who see the rest of humanity as the common enemy.

1984 I got a law degree and taught while studying counselling on and off till 1991. Then I gave up teaching in schools and found the qualifications I had weren't accepted by anyone and ended up working in a shop for 5 years. I was made redundant and besides the week in another job spent the time since gaining the missing therapy qualifications so I can now apply for jobs I won't get.

Those are the stats that count, all the other stuff was alongside that but whatever others think qualified people are supposed to be like, they can't be labelled as writing or talking to a certain way others expect of them. I ramble here as I'm not allowed to in my work (ie the few clients I do see) and won't do with people I know as our conversations are two sided rather than me giving a lecture. A blog is a lecture with questions at the end, so suits my purposes perfectly. Now I think people should save their hate for actual criminals and leave innocent and unfortunate people alone however much they disapprove of them. But as criminals can't write about their exploits online (until the EU approves the human rights of criminals to do so without risk of prosecution) they'll go after us instead and good luck to them. Maybe it'll stop them setting fire to a drunk instead.

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