Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Drawing a blank

This is an interesting test. Each day of freedom shows me it can be used despite no plans until I get there. I got some nice pictures in Harrow School today and then got a few chores done before getting in front of the TV and computer as normal. I've got a counter here now with enough numbers not to get busted in a few years, and finally (I hope) repaired my Internet Explorer as it was only loading pages every few attempts. I still can't use my recent documents but the two went together so may be connected. Tomorrow is free again and besides making a possible video haven't made any decisions, although in the evening do plan some paperwork now it's dark by before 5. I haven't checked the hit counter yet a day after I set it, but will be commenting on others again now it's too dark to stay out very late.

The green taxes hit hard today, with meat to follow the fuel already set to double or more. As if I didn't see it coming and shame on all the gullible fools who thought it was about the planet. I hope one by one these people learn a lesson the governments are bigger crooks than the convicts, and no different from Soviet Russia or even the Nazis, who were arguably more honest as they said exactly what they planned to do and the people happened to agree. I don't of course but I don't agree with the current bunch of wankers either. The era of truth has begun though, the immigration plans are now out of the bag and as long as an MP or two force an enquiry the issue may be discredited as it should have been via the last election that kept these clowns in. The BBC were forced to admit the climate figures, probably before everyone else left them behind to look like climate stability deniers. Boot on other foot now isn't it?

It's always a balance between the personal world and the outside world, any good news on either always helps but comes as and when it chooses. As I have 32 blue panel direction signs already the idea of travelling the London equivalent of an Indiana Jones journey is allowed to discourage me, after getting some far rarer ones just as far afield but on much easier routes. Then is Knockholt, a lot further but in the country, and Sevenoaks which is on one route there. Saved for later if I can be arsed that is. The woman whose sister claimed she wanted to marry me in a few months is not behaving like anyone who even wants more than a free evening of entertainment to me. I don't want more than her body as her mind sadly is a very large echoing void. Quite harmless but the mind of a child. If not she'd have been married years ago.

So I hope for a lot, although hope is second to greed as it's smaller child. But I don't expect it which is the child of unintelligence. I expect nothing as even the usual events can change either way, and only dare to hope as things have happened before so set the precedent. There is a line to cross for every event in my life from darkness to light. Women, fame, sorting out each news issue, and everything else affecting my quality of life. I blog besides living alone as there's no community in London. People in Liphook 50 miles away were saying on TV they all know each other, and had I grew up in a small town like that I'd be part of something and know lots of people nearby. As it is the only neighbour who bothered with me (usually to cadge favours) was sent 60 miles away by a court in his absence, my best friend fled the country in 2002, and my nearest two relatives to me are both dead now. There's Ms Medication, the nearest thing to a relationship currently who does live round the corner and gives little but grief and aggravation, besides getting me out doing things again, someone a few miles away who works nights, my parents even further (in different directions), and currently that's it. There was the creepy lizard literally round the corner who entertained herself visiting for whatever she could get out of my personal abilities till I didn't do her a favour in the way she wanted and let all her poison out by email. Not that that was new, she'd just saved it as if I couldn't tell until she didn't want me any more and let me know what was always in her mind.

Then there's the list of people I do my best to avoid. These are the tail end of a stream of hangers on I've had since I left school who didn't work and found me around during the day when I was a student or working odd hours (yes, I worked properly till a while ago). I learnt to head them off but one or two still return when they feel like a try again. I have a car, a decent computer and plenty to eat. Then I can do my impressions and similar to complete the full use of my potential with absolutely nothing in return. No thanks. I've done my best to keep the sponge from the door but it keeps trying. I've had enough of being sponged and that was after 2am trips to supermarkets and other minicab jobs (unpaid) before I drew the line. So being almost fully isolated from actual people I have no current choice but the internet. I hope (yet again) that will not last for too much longer.

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