Monday, March 08, 2010

Giudance. The next level

Having seen a complete equation which would appear to tell me that unless something can happen the same naturally there has to be connection between everything, and it's able to work for a specific cause. I have seen this so far solely in relation to old road signs I collect. Very appropriate to use signs as signs and very easy to notice.
Now I've seen it work not once but for a year, then regardless of the fact my life and inner self seem no different, my knowledge, as described after I saw it happen to me in the Celestine Prophecy, has been changed and would be pretty hard to undo what I know as it's already happened. So having had a project working on my behalf and when I lost my faith had it brought back by giving me the exact item I thought I'd lost (I hadn't- it wasn't actually there), with another series of events even more complex and dependent on each other that the original scenario it is now safe to suggest the next step. If this is working and in an intelligent way, then regardless of where I am now (where I've been for ages but with many more photos of signs basically) it really could send me to each of my other chosen destinations as it has already with that.

Therefore although I can creep my media career forward with the small stuff- short appearances on fringe TV, articles in professional journals and now photos in a book, possibly to be in a newspaper, I have a list of similar ambitions to the sign collection that are either in their very earliest stages or nowhere at all.

These would be:

Not living alone
Having a girlfriend/wife
Being on terrestrial TV
Having a book published
Being in a national paper
Working on the site I used to (nb getting something back you've lost is one of the hardest of all, more than anything for the first time)
Seeing the scientists finally admit one by one that everything they said about global warming originally is now being overtaken by new facts and it's no longer an issue
Seeing at least one of my old friends again
Having my other friends back from abroad and in London
Getting the truth on alien life
and probably many more that aren't so obvious to think of.

Firstly the only control I've had over this was using the methods in The Secret to help finding one of the signs, but that was before the guidance started clearly. But when it did and since I've had absolutely no control over it. These things turn up when I need them or where they fit into my search. So I can't actually ask for any of the guidance or where I want it to go. I'm putting it here to partly organise my thoughts and partly share the self evident fact that if you accept I may have the guidance in my life then it's part of your life as well. Either our lives are guided or not. When it starts is another thing, but just knowing there's the potential may start it off.
I am also aware my own anxieties are getting in the way but I'm only human and hard to remove existing memories they are based on. Avoiding the past repeating itself is a pretty strong driver even when you work too hard at it. But the bottom line is I want a happy ending. However it happens I've suffered too many of my 50 years, and why should I use up even more the same way? If it hadn't been guided it would be up and down at random, like the weather, but it clearly isn't. Plus sharing it here may remind others when it happened to them and they dismissed it. When it happens properly you sit back and watch, as if it could only have been written as a story. Life wasn't supposed to fit together perfectly was it?

So, I have lost my faith and regained it, and can't restrict a phenomenon to a single area where it can clearly cover them all. I had no say in it coming and what it covered, but can only ask and hope it now covers the next area. I may be able to look for another house later in the year. Unlikely it'll be my first choice but may be my second. I will probably also need a tenant to pay for it, so won't be alone either although that is not the way you ought to fix it. I'm well past expecting to control the woman situation, that stopped at 25 when all the good ones got taken when I was at college doing exams. My media career has to do more than a few photos somewhere where no one knows I did it unless they search the small print. I now need the jump that will get me seen, however it comes. I don't really need to question my writing. It's been used in various places and accepted as professional where required. Here I have fun and mess around but if given a subject know what to do with it.
The next request is not just to direct this guidance more widely but without delay. I should be ready for many improvements- naturally the woman would have to accept my phobias but if you want a person then where you go with them shouldn't put you off as if they'd been a criminal. Even if I got on TV or the papers and was asked to travel around for work I'm not obliged to accept it. It's not for the money and once you've got far enough to reach that point you've got your name on the list already and free to pick and choose. Like with the women, if they really want you then they can come to you to do an interview or do the work locally if possible.

So maybe if I cover all the possible banana skins in advance (I'll have to make a list now) the powers will decide I'm ready and give me each as I am. This is the level of adept, one I have read much about and clearly not a fairy tale. My parallel is the positions of the Indian guru, they either travel or have an ashram. If they have an ashram they are still a guru with the same ability, but you go to him. Who's ever slagged off Sai Baba for not travelling to Wembley? So the precedents for that have been set, and many radio presenters have their studios at home so why not me? I can work round it I'm sure and also now I've done my first outside job for ages I know I'm able to work in a small circle for a short time at least. I do try and come half way wherever possible.

So this is the second level in front of me. I have no idea if it'll materialise but am writing this maybe as part of it, as the guidance has affected me as much as any other director. Making a wrong turn or being caught at traffic lights has also led me to signs I'd never have found otherwise.

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