Wednesday, March 01, 2006


Maybe I'm nearing enlightenment. I can see the need to feel something interesting as the day has passed less and less has been happening. I am now bored stiff, nothing on TV, done the internet since I came home from taking photos, and the only person I spoke to was my neighbour who came to collect a parcel.

I put my 'get a life' scenario to the forums, and eventually got a couple of the sort of comments I was referring to, which illustrated it perfectly. But sadly the sort of people who say and think it aren't going to change, but at least I can make everyone else aware of them and ready for any nonsense they talk.

Otherwise it's all systems wait here. I finished proof reading a book today so that's another job done, the tablets have no side effects and seem to help so that's good, but even with my health getting better boredom can happen to everyone unless they're enlightened. You feel what's behind the usual feelings (whatever that is) and apparently prefer it to the chaos you had before. I'm sure I would. Of course the boredom is very temporary, and could be replaced by any other feeling at any time, but that's the whole point, why be caught up in that endless whirlpool, if there's a way out I'm heading for it.

Any other plans are non-existent at present. I think I more or less completed my digital photo list today, and as flickr only give you 200 photos was nearing my limit as well. Of course I still see unplanned scenes worth taking, but I haven't got anywhere nice or interesting enough to take pictures to bore everyone else with as well. For the places I do take, I exclude 99%. Like my women! The difference is the places have no choice and the women do...

Not wanting to stop while I'm behind, there must be a positive as well as the current level of not much. Being self centred (as accused by one without the sense to know the concept) is only because I am alone with no one else to inspire me. So all I see is my own world as no one else's crosse mine from day to day. That's not worthy of criticism as you might as well criticise Tristan Da Cunha for being remote. If life puts you in a position you react to it. It's not who or what I am, it's what life has done for me right now. If that changes of course I will. I'm not born self centred. And sometimes you are forced to advertise your achievements. I help a lot of troubled people, both for work and people I meet elsewhere. I know I help as they tell me and thank me for it. In life if you piss off two people a year and help fifty, fuck the two, if you didn't hurt them physically (which I never do). Who pleases everyone the whole time? And those who make the most noise regarding others are the ones who contribute the least to life as all they do is make trouble.
Nothing productive can come from a 'bad attitude', as the victim is always just that, and it turns the one with the attitude to a mindless bully who hasn't even got the level of introspection to realise that's all they are.

I have given up trying to reform the unreformable, and just talk about it to save others from worrying if it ever happens around them, as many do. It's their problem and not yours, and sooner or later someone in their immediate circle with less patience and tolerance will either verbally or physically wallop them, they will still believe they weren't in the wrong but at least they'll get a bloody good kicking for it one way or another. And it will. These guys can't turn it on and off, and sooner or later will meet their match, and watch out when they do.

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