Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Emotions

One thing men, especially me, have been accused of, is being separate from my emotions. Wrong. Women unfornately are prone to being ruled by them, while men feel them just the same have been designed to keep logic and commonsense as a priority in comparison. So I get the full gamut of emotions, but was trained (by a woman actually) not to let them run my life.

So counselling methods that put emotions first are actually giving them too much power. I will give an example. If you believe something that causes you stress, only to find out it wasn't true, then the negative emotion should go. But I get people who are more concerned with dealing the emotion than the lie that caused it. I only feel instant relief when I discover a concept I thought was going to ruin my life was wrong, but these guys aren't even that concerned with facts, but wallowing in self pity.

That means they may as well ignore facts altogether, as though none of their negativity existed until they started getting problems and feeling bad about them, discovering the problems were actually quite different to what they believed (as they usually are) that doesn't seem to help, as they've actually got accustomed to feeling shit and like addicts are loth to let it go. If they are clients and want to carry on paying me after I've solved the case I'll carry on happily.

But outside work, the way women ignore major faults in men as they turn them on, accepting violence, lies and unfaithfulness is their downfall, and one men tend to cope with far better. It also means that women are less likely to care what men do or don't do as they either feel right or not, which means they can more or less get away with murder if they are winners. The trouble is it means any good qualities we have will only get us a good job or possibly good friends. But not a partner. Women generally don't care if you're clever, reliable or creative, though funny is the one that crosses over and can be used as a tool if it works. But being Gandhi or Picasso doesn't pull the birds. Power, money and status are far better at attracting women as again the wish to be dominated and often paid for are factors rather than interesting conversation or nursing when they're ill. After years of marriage the good qualities do become more important, but they are not the bait that catches the fish on the first place.

So to set the world straight, I have emotions but because they don't usually affect my judgement, many people say I don't. They have in the past, and I ended up with two flats I didn't like, a number of unsuitable girlfriends, and other dangerous pursuits I was lucky to survive. That's the negative consequence of them, and one no one needs. So now I realise people who have a thing about emotions believe them to be our friend, so follow them ahead of logic, are just deluded.
Nick Roach became so convinced of this fact he turned into Surrey's version of a Vulcan by dissolving his and spending all his time teaching others to. Further than me, he actually says we're better off with no emotions at all. I don't go that far, but am not the soppy fan of them who believes if we don't cry at everyone else's bad news we're tough as nails and not truly human. They just missed the point, but they won't be taught whatever they learn, as they're happy with their lot, despite the trouble it causes them. But none can tell me I'm wrong for not being like them. The evidence is here for all to see.

3 comments:

Sharon Schoepe said...

You can only do what is right for you and be true to who you are. Not all women care about power, money and status.

David said...

I talk on a sliding scale, as it's not an academic paper, so I generalise when I mean the majority, which is between 51% and a lot more. But if it's all then I'd say something more definite. But remember this is London, and whatever poor qualities people have elsewhere they are far more concentrated here. I think that's why I see the worst of it, and a lot of sheep flock here as it attracts similar types.

Wolfie said...

I like your outlook Dave, very healthy.

Sharon, no not all but way too many for my liking.