There are two parts to this post. The prelude, which is planned, and the point, which I am writing the prelude to hope to discover. There are two sorts of people, those more satisfied with life now, and those who aren't. Now I am clearly not, and due to that look for ways to fix it, while those who are stand back and wonder why I talk such rubbish.
Well, eventually, behind all my variety of complaints and possible solutions, there may be a single point. What it is seems to be a fuzzy image now (previously it was nothing) and may come into focus. I hope it is, as it's almost as if I've been set a puzzle and maybe I'm finding the solution. Writing it down here (even if not read) is where I do my working out. You are looking at as much personal unscrambling than anything written for others. It didn't start like that but became my way of doing the mental maths working out.
So my apparent aim is to solve a problem behind dissatisfaction with life as it is. How it happens and how to undo it. This applies to those not happy now, but many who are (as even I have been) but won't be in the future. It's as if somehow I was put in every situation I feared one after another as I had the determination to learn ways out of it. Me, down? Hardly surprising... But I wasn't much of the time people thought I was, bored maybe but I try not to talk about being depressed as no one can do much about it and just brings other people down. But if my physical health would be more reliable that would be the main thing for me.
As I haven't got to the point in my own mind yet, just suspect there is one, I'll write what I was going to about manna from heaven, and let any point come to me as I write. Magic is apparently the aim of my mission, so I'll bear that in mind. The other half of active improvement of life is outside events.
Manna from heaven is rare but we all get a little occasionally. Usually when we don't need it the most but that's its random nature. I'll describe the childish but perfect new age concept of unconditional miracles.
This means we do not need to earn anything, it'll come to us. Being alive is our only qualification for it. No pain and gain, just gain. How childish is that, and how perfect? How they expect it to happen is another story, but it's a nice dream.
I still would like to know what my own point is. I feel all my blogging has been leading up to it. A simple and obvious solution. One people will understand and relate to. Currently I come across as a released mental patient with an intellect but no direction. It isn't quite like that. I look back and see what I write and realise to hook the few views I need to agree I'll alienate the majority of the rest. I see how pointless some of my ideas appear, and that's because they're still a work in progress. Buddha was on a mission to end suffering, and somehow I seem to be in a more modern version of it. Something that will help everyone. Also because I've searched the elite of teachers, and gained a few pieces of the jigsaw. Only Dr Who seems to know it all, and he's not actually real. I have collected their pieces in my picture, but it's still nearly all space.
One example is enlightenment. It's so rare and such a long path if you get it, you actually need something else to relieve the pain until you are. Otherwise you spend your life doing whatever you do that may allow it to happen, but still suffer just as you always did. Meditation is a good escape when it works, but the times it didn't mean it's the best of a pretty average lot. Drugs rob Peter to pay Paul, you may (apparently) feel great for a while, then pay for it afterwards, often until it kills you. Not a good route.
My original mission was bullshit busting, allowing others to see it and maybe force some of the rules that keep us from enjoying life to the full (including speed humps) are removed one by one. But anyone with time on their hands and their heart in the right place can do that and no one ever does a thing when you do anyway. So it can't be that. I have also had a collection of people with my own collection of problems so I can firstly see they are generally present, and also to look at ways to fix it. Knowing an answer may exist means I'm more than half way there, as I am pointing towards a destination possibly.
So while people with happy and normal lives (it seems the majority I come across) look at me with pity (at best) and contempt and embarrassment at worst, I am busy doing what I have to regardless as I've been put in that position. Unlike my ego question which has been dealt with, this is 100% practical. I could say I'll accept no one actually cares what I say and give up, but it's free to write so I'll carry on, plus I've got nothing more interesting to do instead anyway. But critics aside, I saw how apparently confused all my writing appeared since I started this mission, and and maybe the clouds started to clear and just knowing there may be a point will start me aiming to find it, actively when I can and passively if it just comes to me.
But I've prepared and cleared the ground for it with this series of blogs, and my personal wish is to get the point by tomorrow, but getting it at all is fine.