Saturday, December 24, 2005


has happened since yesterday, but as I'm about to go out I thought I'd get in here first, as whenever I have nothing to report I always end up with something here. The only item I forgot to mention was my new neighbour/s arrived on Thursday, and all I will say is my theory was correct, maybe it was psychic, I can't be sure, but it was almost as if I got an image in my mind. I've only seen the man of the house, and my guess was a couple with a child (little room for more) so if I find anyone else I'll keep things updated. I went over just now but he was out, but was there all day yesterday when I was busy. It doesn't look as if it'll be anyone who socialises, but if I'm wrong it'll be nice.

So, as usual I have a small list of attempts on the system, none of which are expected to materialise, also as usual. But if you send the same thing to a million people and it's any good, one should use it. Currently my blog and other writing is with three people and Jenny Eclair has received an email about my performance 20 years ago, as I reported it here and she's now working on LBC so easy to contact. Women are almost another universe (besides ones from the past) and I've dropped the whole subject for now. I doubt anyone at the leisure centre's single, even the staff in their early 20s are all getting pregnant, which would have been fine if I'd had a part in it... (literally). All the ones in the gym have had partners (I make my enquiries) and as that's the main place I meet people despite a very high quality (I'd guess at least ten women have been well up to my standard in the last 3 years) they may as well be on TV for all the use it is to me. Just to lower the tone totally for Christmas/Chanukah/life I have never gone to a prostitute. Mainly as I don't believe it's necessary as long as people I know are available. But the other reason is in this strange country it's legal to work as one, but like solicitors till recently, illegal to advertise. I'm not about to throw a dart in a list of names and spend money on a literal random chance. It wouldn't be nice to turn up and then say 'I don't really fancy you so I'm going'. I know they do advertise regardless, but the few photos are unreliable and then the nice ones probably live in Newcastle or Penrith so it's not really a starter.
Where am I leading? Well, as far as I'm concerned, if I could see someone I liked who was up for it, then I'd pay. Why the hell not? Statistically the number of women I've had that I actually wanted can not only be counted on the fingers of one hand, but I didn't even go all the way with any of them. So of course I'd pay to pick a few favourites as then I could catch god knows what the next day and still die happy. I have very simple needs and that's number one. And they did make a film about it so I don't think many men would disagree, at least in principle.

As usual, I'm pushing the envelope here. A dreadful expression I know, but it fits and I know when I do it. Those people I refer to are those people I have given my URL to, and though I don't insult anyone, and definitely can't identify them (which is the important bit) if I don't write about everyone I know it'll only be half a blog, a car with no wheels. So if I have created a few red faces on my travels, I apologise, but it is a writer's role to relate true instances, and for goodness sake, if any woman on earth were to announce online, on the radio and on TV they wanted my babies I'd be up in the clouds, whoever they were! It's funny (good example of reverse sexism) how if a man says the same thing most women would curl up in embarrassment. Considering it has to take both a man and a woman to do the job, how on earth can the reactions be so polarily different? I certainly don't know, besides being an extension of the Victorian/Catholic 'Ladies don't like sex' kick. But talking about it here or anywhere else can't change deeply held attitudes, and it's only cultural as even if a few Pacific islands had women as the primary movers (and I think they do) it would prove it wasn't genetic. Besides that, if I didn't come straight out with things it would break a tradition going back my whole life of saying things out in the open. No one's tried to assasinate me yet or kicked me out of anywhere for it, except one total arsehole at college, who deliberately didn't tell me I had to be on a formal placement so he could throw me out of my course at the end of the year, as I was so outspoken in class. Luckily he retired and I got a placement and carried on, but it did spoil things for some time. Otherwise the respect I ought to get, both from the many people who don't dare to say things directly but wish they could, and those that do, as well as my self respect which is the most important, would be lost just for not wanting to rock the boat a bit.

Underneath we're all the same (even men and women), so saying you want to have kids with someone, live with them, or any other observation good or bad is what we all think as long as we're awake, and then continues in our dreams. It's just only a minority voice those wishes as they seem to believe if they let the person find out the truth it'll make the sky fall in. Well, as I said, I've been doing it, originally involuntarily, but then under discretion, and I'm still here. I've lost no friends, jobs or any other benefits, and hope on the plus side I've shown it's both possible to talk straight and actually preferable. If women were to write about me I'd be amazed they were even interested enough to mention me. Sometimes Indie Queen does (thanks Indie) as we spend a lot of time online together, though due to a few thousand miles have never met. I don't think anyone else has though, though to be fair no one I know in person even has a website, let alone a blog. One does have a photo album now he's travelling, but that's the only one I can think of. But again, if we write about people then it's not sensible or accurate to leave bits out, unless libellous of course. So if I send my words in a circle by telling people about this and then writing about them it's natural, as they're the very people I know to write about, and as I said, had my first official request for inclusion last week. But then to have to select bits to mention or not would be the artistic equivalent of holding ones breath. I really want to say the things I do about people. And to say I want kids with anyone is a pretty high compliment, don't you think? How many women do any of us know (assuming we're single) we'd want kids with? Not many, I'm sure. So shift your perception ladies, stop the red faces and angry knee-jerk reactions when I or any other man says they like you (anonymously), a lot. One day when you're alone and no longer in the flush of youth you'll be desperate for even the toothless old bloke at the centre to want you and remember how many men you turned down when things were going the other way. Respect and acknowledge every compliment now as they don't carry on for ever, and the man you may turn down today could be married with kids of his own when you suddenly need him. I should know, I did exactly the same when I was in my 20s, and have one or more possible long-term partners that never happened purely as I didn't know the value of what was right in front of me before it was too late.


Philosopher Newport said...

How ya crackin' on with the Newport book??

By the way: your webcam don't show up on Mozilla Firefox, but it do with IE.

There might be a webcam extension for Firefox, I'll look into it.

Last I heard you wuz up to page 55 of that someday-to-be-famous Newport book, is this true?

David said...

I certainly am, and should be right through it by next week. You are one of the few that stands up for the different, we need more!
Glad you found the webcam at last, my HTML has managed to fix it again and it's running smoothly again. Have a good christmas and I'll report when I've read everything.